Balinese Puppet Shadows

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
While not written to be pornographic there are many explicit descriptions of sex not appropriate for minors. Only adults should read this book.

A Chinese/Philippine girl grows up poor in a dysfunctional family. The family settled in Tropicana Village a vast low income subdivision on the East side of Santa Clara Valley, California, before it became Silicon Valley. Unlike other neighbor kids, she attends parochial school and wants to be a nun. During puberty, however, imagining a movie scene while taking a soapy shower, she commits an impure act of self stimulation, a mortal sin. She discovers sex, not as talked about but as felt. Ashamed to confess her transgression to the priest she sins again and again concealing a wanton secret puppet shadow, a hidden life unknown to all but her.

In January, 1966 her future husband, stops her on the sidewalk as she walks home from her bus stop after school. She is 16. He just moved next door, is white and is five years older. On her 17th birthday she is engaged to him and at 18, they marry. Once engaged he takes responsibility for her life including saving her virginity until marriage.

She in return obtains security and escape from her dysfunctional family and vows to be the loyal wife and super mom. Always shy and with low self esteem, she eventually realizes while married she is the swan her father said, not the ugly duckling she thought. From a husband's swinging suggestion her secret puppet shadow returns to develop a wanton life of infidelity despite appearing to be the good wife. Like a spy she betrays all who trust her for her secret shadow life.

The serial tale reveals her secret puppet shadow's life of wanton sex with many men as seen from her perspective of hindsight in old age. As she writes she learns who she really was, loved and who loved her, accepting she is not the innocent pretended and what she thought was, was not.

While not written to be pornographic there are many explicit descriptions of sex not appropriate for minors. Only adults should read this book.

While explicit it is written not to use vulgar words unless necessary for the character. I apologize for the graphic descriptions but they are integral to wantonness and adultery which occur.

Table of Contents

Prologue To Adultery

Submitted: October 18, 2016


While not written to be pornographic there are many explicit descriptions of sex not appropriate for minors. Only adults should read this book.


I apologize for the graphic salacious descriptions but they are integral to the wantonness and adultery which occur.


While explicit it is written to avoid use of vulgar words except in a few instances necessary for a particular uncouth character.
Read Chapter

Chapter One, Rear View Mirror

Submitted: October 18, 2016

Chapter One, Rear View Mirror Reflection I'm old, not in spirit but old none the less. Young, it was so short a time ago. Then yo... Read Chapter

Chapter Two, Santa Clara Valley Poor Girl, Before Silicon

Submitted: October 18, 2016

Chapter Two, Santa Clara Valley Before Silicon, A Poor Girl Faces The World   On the morning of June 8, 1950, I met the worl... Read Chapter

Chapter Three, A Father Looked Up To Who Doesn’t Provide

Submitted: January 06, 2017

Chapter Three, A Father Looked Up To Who Doesn’t Provide   Dad was great at siring kids, womanizing and cooking. He was Ch... Read Chapter

Chapter Four, Admired Hotel Maid Mother

Submitted: January 06, 2017

Chapter Four, Admired Hotel Maid Mother   I never saw physical contact between my parents but with 5 kids knew something was... Read Chapter

Chapter Five, Catholic Parochial School, God Loves Me

Submitted: October 18, 2016

Chapter Five, Catholic Parochial School, God Loves Me     My siblings attended public school. Mom only enrolled me ... Read Chapter

Chapter Six, Norte Dame High School Puberty

Submitted: January 07, 2017

Chapter Six, Notre Dame High School Puberty   Between 13 and 16 I experienced puberty and left hop scotch and jump rope behi... Read Chapter

Chapter Seven Mortal Sins, A Secret Puppet Shadow’s Birth

Submitted: October 21, 2016

Chapter Seven, Mortal Sin's Secret Puppet Shadow Birth   The 1st time sex was openly mentioned in parochial school was at th... Read Chapter

Chapter Eight Driver's License Kiss

Submitted: October 23, 2016

Chapter Eight, Driver’s License Kiss   While my puberty’s puppet shadow fantasied about attractive boys, I was boy shy. ... Read Chapter

Chapter Nine, Engaged At 17 With Parent's Consent

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter Nine, Engaged At 17 With Parent’s Consent   After his chauffeuring, driving lessons, hanging around our house, and... Read Chapter

Chapter Ten, Fiancée Honors And Protects Me

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter Ten, My Fiancée Honors And Protects Me   Engaged on my 17th birthday, my fiancée’s parents were initially not pl... Read Chapter

Chapter Eleven, Girl’s Night Out

Submitted: January 07, 2017

Chapter 12, Girl’s Night Out The summer of 1967, just after my engagement, I got a job at The Tropicana Gardens Bowl, with fibs I w... Read Chapter

Chapter Twelve, Alviso Train Kiss

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter Twelve, Alviso Train Kiss While everyone had heard of Alviso, had a vague notion of where it was, most like me, even though b... Read Chapter

Chapter Thirteen, Wedding Bells Peal

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter 13, Wedding Bells Peal   Things after Alviso’s train passage went as scheduled. On a Saturday, bright morning, Jun... Read Chapter

Chapter Fourteen, Honeymoon Highway, Past And Future To Be

Submitted: January 07, 2017

Chapter Fourteen, Honeymoon Highway, Past And Future To Be   Disneyland, our honeymoon destination, was a 2 day, 400-mile tr... Read Chapter

Chapter Fifteen, Motel 6 Virgin Gets Pregnant

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter Fifthteen, Motel 6 Virgin Gets Pregnant   After passing Santa Maria, the next town was Santa Barbara, our wedding ni... Read Chapter

Chapter Sixteen, Girl With Babies, House and Parents

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter Sixteen, Girl With Babies, House and Parents   As soon as my pregnancy was confirmed we turned in the 57 Chevy, the ... Read Chapter

Chapter Seventeeen, Asian Stereotype, Rickie Rests In Peace And Apple Pie

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter 17, Asian Stereotype, Rickie Rests In Peace And Apple Pie I wondered now and then. I'm not Japanese, Chinese or Pinay, I'... Read Chapter

Chapter Eighteen, 1970's Sex Revolution

Submitted: January 07, 2017

Chapter 18, 1970's Sex Liberation While having enjoyed soapy showers and then sex with hubby, I didn’t feel sexy while caring for b... Read Chapter

Chapter Nineteen, Cobra Belly Dances

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter Nineteen, Cobra Belly Dances   I’d enjoyed soapy showers and sex with hubby but didn’t feel sexy while caring fo... Read Chapter

Chapter Twenty, Fixing A Silicon Valley Culture Shock Flat

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter Twenty, Fixing A Silicon Valley Culture Shock Flat   During America’s 1970’s sexual revolution, Santa Clara Vall... Read Chapter

Chapter Twenty One A Swinger's Party Innuendo

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter Twenty One, Swinger’s Party Innuendo   The news media, movies, TV programs, even education in the 1970’s suddenl... Read Chapter

Chapter Twenty Two, Shoe Store Earrings, Forbidden Phone Calls And A Dress

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter Twenty Two, Shoe Store Earrings, Forbidden Phone Calls And A Dress Tra la! It's May! The lusty month of May! That lovely ... Read Chapter

Chapter Twenty Three, Infidelity Love Dates

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter Twenty Three, Infidelity Love Dates I let Edward call a few times more before agreeing to meet him the next Saturday evening,... Read Chapter

Chapter Twenty Four, A Girl Becomes A Woman

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter Twenty Four, Girl Becomes Woman The next Saturday night I stayed home due to husband jealously. The Saturday after, however, ... Read Chapter

Chapter Twenty Five, Jealous Husband

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter TwentyFive, Husband’s Jealousy Fit After lunch, the children outside blissfully playing, the questions began at the kitchen... Read Chapter

Chapter Twenty Six, Serving Two Men, Betraying Both

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter 26, Serving Two Men, Betraying Both Being the center of 2 men’s fluttering guppy tails assured my desirability. While empow... Read Chapter

Chapter Twenty Seven, Edward’s Edward’s Branding And Sex Games

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter Twenty 'Seven, Edward’s Branding And Sex Games My transition the night I changed from girl to woman continued under Edward... Read Chapter

Chapter Twenty Eight, Pregnancy Scare And Edward’s Upscale World

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter Twenty Eight, Pregnancy Scare And Edward’s Upscale World   Some night dates with Edward were domestic due to time ... Read Chapter

Chapter Twenty Nine, Love Is Impossible

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter 29, Impossible Love Edward filled what I thought was missing in life but our physical time together was limited. With his int... Read Chapter

Chapter Thirty, Goodbye Is Hard To Say

Submitted: November 06, 2016

I wanted but never expected Edward to be faithful but for what I knew he was. There was never evidence of another woman in the almost two... Read Chapter

Chapter Thirty One, A Pushy Engineer

Submitted: November 06, 2016

Chapter Thirty One, Pushy Engineer Introduction   I continued to work swing shift after Edward left, was accepted at work as... Read Chapter

Chapter Thirty Two, The Alpha Engineer Is Tamed

Submitted: November 07, 2016

Chapter Thirty Two, Alpha Engineer Tamed   The next morning, I showed the dress and shoes to hubby. He wanted to know what t... Read Chapter

Chapter Thirty Three, Mr. Supini Introduces Himself

Submitted: November 07, 2016

Chapter Thirty Three, Mr. Supini Introduces Himself   It was a half hour drive to the San Jose Airport, Holiday Inn. Back th... Read Chapter

Chapter Thirty Four, Tiff, Tat, Lovers Spats

Submitted: November 07, 2016

Chapter Thirty Four, Tiff, Tat, Lovers Spats Enrico being married could only see me on the sly which suited me. When together we were... Read Chapter

Chapter Thirty Five, A Trophy Ring Goodbye

Submitted: November 07, 2016

Chapter Thirty Five, Trophy Ring For Goodbye   When meeting Enrico I wore Edward’s sapphire ring. Eventually he asked abou... Read Chapter

Chapter Thirty Six, Pacific Northwest Chaste In The Rain

Submitted: November 07, 2016

Chapter Thirty Six, Chaste Pacific Northwest Rain In 1979, with trophy ring memories, I followed hubby to the Pacific Northwest, part... Read Chapter

Chapter Thirty Seven, Country Bar Hot Wives

Submitted: November 07, 2016

Chapter Thirty Seven, Hot Wives In A Country Bar In January 1981, hubby switched jobs to work for a national company which required h... Read Chapter

Chapter Thirty Eight, The Potter’s Spinning Wheel

Submitted: November 07, 2016

Chapter Thirty Eight, A Potter’s Spinning Wheel With mind and heart nixing bar hopping, Vixen out of control, I compromised and sou... Read Chapter

Chapter Thirty Nine, The Birds Sing, But Then It’s Over

Submitted: November 07, 2016

Chapter , Thirty Ninehe Birds Sing Approval Until It's Over   It was a long wait until he called and said the dishes were fi... Read Chapter

Chapter Forty, Affairs Circle Crumbles

Submitted: November 07, 2016

Chapter 44, Affairs Circle Crumbles Thumper made, "Now Now", an Affairs Circle star. A trophy ring quest among them ensued. They soug... Read Chapter

Chapter Forty One, Space Invader’s Green Grass Golf Course

Submitted: November 07, 2016

Chapter Forty One, Green Grass Space Invader   By the summer of 1985, most of my new higher income friends were conservative... Read Chapter

Chapter Forty Three, Tisk, Tisk Lipstick On A Hotel Window

Submitted: November 08, 2016

Chapter Forty Three, Tisk, Tisk, Lipstick On A Hotel Window Vixen sated by hubby, my heart and mind cleared, ashamed for flirting wit... Read Chapter

Chapter FortyFour, Apartment Rug Burns

Submitted: November 11, 2016

Chapter Forty Four, Apartment Rug Burns   I expected Elliot's interest to wane once he added me to his "seduced list" but th... Read Chapter

Chapter Forty Five, No Diamond

Submitted: November 12, 2016

Chapter Forty Five, No Diamond Elliot never bought clothes, perfume or makeup like Edward and only on occasion flowers or jewelry. Ou... Read Chapter

Chapter Forty Six, 36 C, At 40 Instead Of An Orange Dress

Submitted: November 12, 2016

Chapter 50, 36 C At 40 Instead Of Orange Dress After Elliot, I snuggled back with husband, spent more time in the office but by 1990... Read Chapter

Chapter Forty Seven, Mother-In-Law And Dad Secret Puppet Shadows

Submitted: November 12, 2016

Chapter Forty Seven, Mother-In-Law And Dad Secret Puppet Shadows   Mother In Law We hoped our kids would be accepted at St... Read Chapter

Chapter Forty Eight, Mom’s Secret Puppet Shadow

Submitted: November 12, 2016

Chapter Forty Eight, Mom’s Secret Puppet Shadow Sunday morning, arising early at the Sainte Clare Hotel where I always stayed when ... Read Chapter

Chapter Forty Nine, Recue By Sail Boat Skipper

Submitted: November 13, 2016

Chapter Forty Nine, Recue By Sail Boat Skipper Parked in an Alameda Avenue bus stop, I composed myself after my mind retching turned ... Read Chapter

Chapter Fifty, Sound At Sea

Submitted: November 13, 2016

Chapter Fifty, Sound at Sea Sailing with William was limited due to our schedules and sailing requirements. While we sailed again the... Read Chapter

Chapter Fifty One, Deck Framer Biceps

Submitted: November 13, 2016

Chapter Fifty One, Deck Framer Biceps The affair with William lasted almost 2 years. My secret puppet shadow was easy to conceal once... Read Chapter

Chapter Fifty Two, Caught In The Act

Submitted: November 14, 2016

Chapter Fifty Two, Caught in The Act The next week, just before noon, as usual, I arrived at William's for our ritual romp with a vie... Read Chapter

Chapter Fifty Three, Rough Encounter

Submitted: November 14, 2016

Chapter Fifty Three, Rough Framer’s Biceps   After William rushed to cuddle his true love, his abandonment of me to fend f... Read Chapter

Chapter Fifty Four, Framer’s Mistake

Submitted: November 15, 2016

Chapter Fifty Four, Framer Error   After 6 months Paul made a mistake which broke the chains he held me by. Sitting in bed a... Read Chapter

Chapter Fifty Five, Angel Gabriel

Submitted: November 15, 2016

Chapter Fifty Five, Angel Gabriel After the burdens of learning family heritage truths, William's abandonment and Paul's debasement i... Read Chapter

Chapter Fifty Six, I Confess

Submitted: November 16, 2016

Chapter Fifty Six, My Confession Lying next to one another on the bed, at last I made a confession, a taut music box spring confessio... Read Chapter

Chapter Fifty Seven, A Captain Joins My Book Club

Submitted: November 17, 2016

Chapter Fifty Seven, A Captain Joins My Book Club After my confession the only star's gravitation which pulled my life’s orbit... Read Chapter

Chapter Fifty Eight, The Funeral

Submitted: November 17, 2016

Chapter 64, A Funeral Awakens Succubus   Crossing the infidelity Rubicon with the Captain caused another. Who am I? ... Read Chapter

Chapter Fifty Nine, Last Gasp Things

Submitted: November 25, 2016

Chapter Fifty Nine, Last Gasp Things Freed, Succubus, initially acted out imagined, “I should have been!” characters. She wanted ... Read Chapter

Chapter Sixty, Hi Honey, I’m Home

Submitted: November 27, 2016

Chapter Sixty, Hi Honey, I’m Home With my secret puppet shadow in the memory trunk permanently I devoted myself, as promised on my ... Read Chapter

Chapter Sixty One, Guilty, The 7th Deadly Sin

Submitted: November 28, 2016

Chapter Sixty One, Guilty, The 7th Deadly Sin Fate’s fickle turns leave us with few lifelong friends. Some drifted in after high sc... Read Chapter

Chapter Sixty Two, Epilogue

Submitted: November 28, 2016

Chapter Sixty Two, Epilogue With attempted humility, I attend church again; a small Catholic one which, on occasion has a special Lat... Read Chapter

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