The Man with No Balls

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Horror  |  House: Booksie Classic
It was the first day that John knew his life would end...

Submitted: October 18, 2016

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Submitted: October 18, 2016



The Man with No Balls

The clock struck 10am and Lukas Kelp stumbled out of his bed - he had been on a huge bender the night before.  'Fuck me' he moaned in his thick African accent as he bent over and put a carrot up his arse, as was usual in London at the time.  Pulling open his window a strong gust blew him over and he began to cry.  Lukas wasn't crying because he was sad, he wept because that breeze of wind knocked the carrot so far up his chiefer that he started to bleed.

Suddenly, a great eagle flew in through the window and began to suck his penis.  Lukas shouted 'AWAY!' but the bird said 'everything is mine'.  It dawned on Lukas that he couldn't fight this majestic beast so he began to embrace the sloppy beak that was wrapped around his thick member.  The eagle flapped it's wings in a rage and began scratching at Lukas' balls.  'I will finish you!' he cried and with a big blow he knocked the eagle unconscious.  'Nothing is yours now, is it?  My feathery friend...' he cackled while prying the birds beak off his enormous cock.

The clock struck 1pm and Lukas Kelp woke up for the second time today in a pool of his own blood.  He looked down and to his amazement saw that his balls were hanging from his body by a thread of fine silk.  He immediately began to start chewing on the silken thread so that he might suck the sperm from his nuts and save his children.  In a fit of agony he tore the balls from his body and began licking them like they had been his own fathers.  With the milky liquor pouring down his luscious lips Lukas screamed to the world 'STOP!' as he had done so many times before in his miserable life.  But the world didn't stop.

Lukas got up and began running out of the front door.  He burst onto Carnaby Street and began assaulting tourists and policemen.  He felt as though he was immortal.  In some strange way the bird had transferred its power to Lukas and at once he felt gold surge through his veins as he grew in height and penis size.  His muscles started trembling and Lukas realised he was having an orgasm.  Ripping his cock off he threw it like a spear into the head of the Chief of Police who screamed a bloodcurdling 'FUCK YOU!' as he passed into the next life.

It was at this point that Lukas realised he needed to stop being such a fucking wasteman and he injected himself with a needle that he found while robbing one of the tourists.  The needle contained an elixir... the elixir of life.  Lukas now, was really immortal...


© Copyright 2017 John Fish. All rights reserved.

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