Tinderella

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
Modern remakes of old classics

Submitted: November 09, 2016

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Submitted: November 09, 2016

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Once upon a time, there lived a girl of unimaginable beauty. She radiated with a delicate, piercing glow, but her soul was scarred by the death of her parents when she was a child. The heartbreak was painted on the blank canvas of her life and made her vulnerable- but all the more beautiful. The girl had moved to live with her evil stepmother and her 3 cruel stepsisters. In this house, the three sisters were consumed with jealousy over their stepsisters beauty. No matter how many filters they tried out, no matter how much editing they did on their Princetagram selfies, they were reminded of their physical imperfections every time they saw their stepsister's beauty. They tried to hide her perfection by ripping up her shapeless Primark jumpers, by creating a new Instagram account and posting pictures of her curled up on the floor sleeping, mid-snore. However, the sisters were all the more infuriated when these pictures started getting more likes than their own. They proceeded by trying their hardest to take the worst pictures of their sister while furiously editing their own posts. However, this was done to no prevail. Their social media followers started dropping as their sister's grew. The sisters were lost in a mad rage. When, one day, they posted one particularly unflattering picture of their step sister, the picture received no likes. Thinking they had finally won, the sisters thrust the phone in the poor, beautiful girl's face, laughing and pushing her around. All of a sudden, the phone dinged- a new IM had appeared. A hush fell on the room. The sisters, fingers shaking in fury, clicked on their sister's inbox. The message was from Princey148- the young creator of Princetagram. The message read:

'Hey, cute pics- you look great sleeping, but I'd love to see you awake. Give me a shout if you're free to come to the launch of my new app tonight. Princey."

The sisters took a moment to let the message sink in, then looked at each other- half excited to be holding a phone which had a message from Princey, half disgusted that the message wasn't meant for them. The sisters pushed their way into the other room, arguing over who was going to pretend to be their sister, and if they should message back asking for guest invites.

 

The poor sister was left sitting on her own in her tiny bedroom, with only an old Nokia for company- she couldn't even get internet access to reply to her admirer. She cried out in exasperation and flung her phone across the room, which bounced back off the wall and landed on the floor perfectly intact. Burying her head in her pillow, the girl lay there and cried into the night.

 

As darkness fell on the house, anyone walking around outside would have noted a strange energy in the air. There seemed to be a static atmosphere developing, and if they had happened to follow this to the source they would have spotted an odd glow outside the window of a small room with a beautiful, heartbroken girl sobbing on her bed. If this person had happened to stay for 5 minutes longer, they would have seen the dull glow suddenly burst into a bright light, and a short, robust lady in a tight fairy outfit tumble out of a strange portal and onto the grass underneath the window.

'bollocks' she muttered, 'missed again'. She peered into the window and gave the wand in her hand a grand, elaborate twirl- then cracked the end of it onto the glass pane, causing the girl to jump up in alarm. Now, this girl was very naive and vulnerable, but even a naive and vulnerable girl would be put aback by a stranger peering excitedly into her window. Her eyes widened, her mouth opened ready to let out an almighty scream- when the odd lady outside suddenly whipped out a strange looking phone which she pointed towards the Nokia lying on the floor. Suddenly, the phone screen lit up. A message appeared on the screen. Curious now, the girl apprehensively picked up the phone and looked at the message.

'Oi come on love, open up the window- it's bloody freezing out here'. Now, this message didn't particularly instill any trust in the girl, who promptly turned off the phone and made a move towards her door. Suddenly, the phone screen lit up again. Frowning, the girl looked down.

'Alright treacle, I'm not here to hurt you- I just want to get you to Princey's party tonight so you can show those bitc- sisters, sorry, of yours who's boss'. The girl was amazed- how could this strange, small lady know so much about her life? Tentatively, she reached over towards the window. She pulled it open a crack.

 

'Hello? How can I help you um... Miss?'

'Well to start with darling you can let me in, I'm so cold people will start to think I'm smuggling Tic Tacs in my bra!'

The girl giggled. She liked how this lady told her exactly what she thought rather than being horrible to her all the time. She opened the window further, and the small lady- oddly spritely considering her appearance- leapt up and, in the manner of an olympic diver, jumped through the window, rolled on the floor, and sprung to her feet. She then stumbled forwards, toppled over and hit her head on the bedroom door.

'Blimey, bit small in here isn't it?' She shook her head and looked at the girl who was staring at her in amazement. 'Crikey, you are fit aren't you? Though those clothes aren't the best...' With a wave of her wand, the girl was suddenly dressed in a beautiful dress. 'That's better!' cried the fairy. 'And that phone... You won't get anyone impressed with that.' All of a sudden, the phone transformed from a Nokia into a brand new smartphone which had a logo of a pumpkin with a bite taken out of it on the back. Excited, the girl picked up the phone and looked at the bright screen. 'Have a look at this app... You should see your prince there pretty soon.' The girl opened an app with a strange flame icon. A picture of her with the username 'Tinderella' appeared on the bottom of the screen. There was a picture of a large, hairy man appearing on the screen with a green heart and a red X beneath. Immediately, Tinderella clicked on the X. Next up came another picture of strange looking guy, which she immediately swiped no on.

 

*30 Minutes Later*

 

Finally, 45 matches and countless left swipes later, Tinderella came across 'Princey'. The minute she saw his picture her heart skipped a beat. Not literally as that would indicate some serious medical concerns, but to her that was how it felt. She looked up at the fairy and whispered,

'But... how do I even get there?' The fairy chuckled.

'Sorry love, have you even heard of the internet before?' She tapped on her phone. 'There. You'll have a taxi here in 5 minutes. Just one warning... You have to be home by midnight or the spell will break and you will turn back to how you were before I came along. Now go, and have fun!'

 

Tinderella tumbled out of the taxi outside a huge club with glamorous people spilling out. There was a red carpet outside with swarms of people pointing cameras at everybody and nobody, trying to shove the lenses up skirts and take snaps at the most inopportune moment when people were mid-sneeze or picking the wedgie out of their bum. However, as soon as Tinderella swept out of the cab everyone seemed to freeze, stopping what they were doing and staring in her direction. She blushed, and timidly stepped forward onto the red carpet- when she was pushed out of the way by a huge man in a black suit, who stormed down the carpet, pushing the suddenly active camera men out of the way. An escort of 6 burly suited grunts made their way out of a limo surrounding the man of the hour- Princey. Tinderella stared at him as he made his way through the throng of people who had congregated around the entrance. All of a sudden, his sweeping gaze locked on to her- before he was swept away inside the party.

 

Tinderella waited until the commotion died down and made her way into the party. Funnily enough, she was allowed straight in while a group of 5 guys behind her were inexplicably held up. She continued through the party, staring at all the bright lights while the numbing throb of the speakers ensured nobody could hear what the person standing next to them were saying, resulting in a lot of nodding heads and blank stares. All of a sudden, on a raised platform in the middle of the room Tinderella spotted her 3 step sisters in crop tops and short skirts dancing with 3 older looking men. The sisters were looking around the room while they danced, and all of a sudden one stopped still and pointed at Tinderella, screeching to her slowly gyrating sisters to look over. Tinderella stopped in her tracks and dove into a large crowd and behind a poorly guarded red cloth barrier into a slightly quieter room. Taking a deep breath, she slowly made her way to the crowded bar to order a drink. Around 30 seconds later, Tinderella walked away from the bar with 2 free drinks in hand and another waiting at the bar. She walked around the room, staring at the oscillating disco ball suspended above them- when she bumped into a tall, strong man. She quickly looked at him, stammering an apology for spilling one of her drinks on his sleeve- when she saw it was Princey with a large grin on his face. She immediately went quiet, blushing, and turned quickly to leave. He grabbed her by the arm, shouting through the noise.

'Hold on, are you going to spill a drink on me and not even stay for a dance?' This seemed fairly reasonable to Tinderella, who felt bad that his jacket was ruined, so she decided to stay for one quick dance. This turned into 2 quick dances, then a slightly longer third dance, and soon she glanced up at the clock with her head buried in Princey's chest- and spotted it was 11:58. She glanced at him, eyes wide in fear, and ran out. As she ran, she dropped her smartphone, but didn't have time to pick it up and on she ran. She burst through the doors of the club and jumped into the nearest taxi, sobbing as her dress began to transition back to the bulky jumper she had been wearing earlier and her hair became frayed and tangled. The taxi drove her back to the unwelcoming house, back to the horrible step sisters. Back to her life.

 

Now, while Tinderella made her way home, Princey picked up the mobile phone she had dropped. By some strange magical coincidence unexplainable to even the most learned magical experts, the phone stayed as a smartphone instead of turning back into the brick originally used by Tinderella. Princey had tried turning on this phone but it was locked through fingerprint recognition, and try as he might the only information he could find of her online was her Princetagram profile and a hastily made Fire account. He saw that she was based around his area, and promised himself that he would find the girl no matter what. The only way he could conceivably think to do this would be by going around the town and asking every girl he saw to try their thumb print on the phone until he found the one that fit. Because that made perfect sense. So do that he did, and for weeks he had no luck until one fateful day.

 

Princey rolled up to the large house, tired after a long day fingerprint scanning. This was the last house he would try today, he told himself. He stepped out the car, went up and knocked on the door. After a minute, it was swung open by a horrible looking older lady.

'Ummm... Never mind' said Princey, resigned that this wouldn't be the place.

'Hold on- aren't you Princey?' said the lady. 'My daughters are huge fans of yours! Hold on, let me call them down!' Sighing, Princey nodded in resignation. In went the lady, and seconds later, down came 3 squealing sisters. Princey looked over them once, and knew they weren't the right girls. Nevertheless, they insisted that they should be able to try their thumb prints instead. All three girls stepped up and tried their thumbs at every angle, every pressure imaginable. Finally, Princey had enough.

'Listen ladies, very sorry but it looks like this isn't your phone and-' All of a sudden, his speech stopped and his mouth dropped open. Confused, the sisters looked round- and saw Tinderella in tattered clothes- staring at Princey. They scoffed, saying

'Well if it isn't us, it sure as hell isn-' The sisters were silenced as Princey pushed through the middle of them, stopping in front of Tinderella, wordlessly taking her trembling hand and placing her delicate thumb on the phones thumbprint scanner. The screen unlocked, but Princey didn't once look down from Tinderella's gaze.


© Copyright 2017 jakeness11. All rights reserved.

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