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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Fantasy  |  House: Contently Deranged Travelers
A Gaga fan-fiction.

Submitted: December 12, 2016

A A A | A A A

Submitted: December 12, 2016



The portal opened and I stepped out. I took a deep breath and exhaled. I was in New York. Business was booming. I was looking for some fun. I put in my earphones, Poker Face was playing. “Can't read my, can't read my...” I walked up to the first building and opened the door. There was an escalator. I rode up to what seemed to be a bar. It was dark and gloomy and I could hear the techno booming through my earphones.

“Funny finding you here.”

“ I knew you would come.”

“So, what do you want this time? My soul again?”

I pointed my spirit bow at his forehead. “You know I won't go without a fight.”

“Relax. I have a job for you.”

“Of course. I was looking for some fun. What is it?”

“I want you to be Lady Gaga.”

“Really? How will I manage that?”

“Easy, I put you in a glass box, when you come out, you're Lady Gaga. That's it.”

“I don't believe I have a choice, do I?”

“Its easier if you come clean.”

“I'll do it, but only if its a luxury box.”

“Its good enough.”

I follow the devil through a velvet curtain into the back of the bar. The box is tall with one metal wire attached.

“That's interesting technology.”

“It works.”

He opens the box and I step in. He closes the door. I see him saying an incantation. Immediately I see sparks of electricity. It's painful. Then it stops. He opens the door and leads me to a mirror where I see my hair. It was platinum blond. Then I saw my face. A little fuller but not too different.

“Nice job. Could've done without the pain though.”

“You're fine aren't you? Now I want you to find Neo. He has a song for you.”

“Fun, the matrix.”

“That's the song you're doing, matrix. But he has the code. Don't come back without that code.”

“If I come back at all.”


Neo is sitting on his throne. “Who sent you?”

“The devil. It's for matrix.”

“You want matrix? That's funny.”

I pointed my spirit bow at him.

“I don't want any funny business.”

“Lets make an agreement. You go back and kill the devil and I'll forget all about this.”

“You guys are working together.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Because you're making this impossible.”

I shoot an arrow. He dodges.

“ I won't be attacked.”

“You already are.”

I pull out a spirit knife. “I will have the matrix.”

He appears in front of me and kisses my lips.

“Not before I make you sing.”

I stab him in the stomach.

“You know I won't die.”

“I know but I have to-”

He kisses me again. “Come with me.”

A portal opens and we are in a bedroom.

“What is this?”

I'm suddenly strapped to the bed.

“Stop this.”

“I just want to do one thing.”

He puts a chip on the center of my forehead.

“There.” And everything goes black.

I'm getting worried. I just started feeling better.

Then I see a white spiral above me.

Out comes a big red demon. He looks in my direction and pulls out a long bright sword.


I struggle.

He points the sword at me and in a flash it cuts my throat. I can feel the blood running. Fawns appear and lap up the blood. I'm in pain, and furious. I struggle, but its no use. I telepath God.

“Oh, now you want me.”

“Are you going to leave me like this?”

The ribbons on my wrists untie and I heal my throat. I untie the other ribbons and jump through an express portal. I send God a mental thank you.

Fuck matrix. I have to escape. I make it to Aphrodite.

The ocean is shimmering. The breeze is cool.

© Copyright 2020 Juan Valdez. All rights reserved.

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