Its easier to let go.

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
When we love, we create a home within someone. A home that we cherish, invest in and forevermore expect to remain. However this is where we go wrong. By putting so mucch of ourselves into that home that doesnt completely belong to us, we allow ourselves to become broken when that home falls apart. That home falls apart taking everything that you put inside with it. Sometimes we are better off investing in ourselves and allow us to be happy without the need of someone.

Put yourself first before its too late..

Submitted: December 19, 2016

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Submitted: December 19, 2016

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When you surmise the life of a adolescent you'd expect a life of excitement and passion where your besotted with socializing and friends. The biggest decison you would be expected to make is what new trendy outfit you'll wear next, or what computer game is yet to come but i found myself within a spine chilling position that scarred me for life. Witnessing the person you are completely bewitched with and cherish turning into the monster you never saw coming, the one he said hed never become. 

With Him and i it was never how everyone expected it to be. We were never the soppy and sentimental couple that would hang around the corridors smooching or purposely display our affection infront of people but the love we shared was evident. This was maybe me just being an infatuated teenage girl but i thought this would last forever and he promised me it would. Simply the beginning of his charlatan promises. The repercussions of our fiery arguments never made me love him any less, infact there was something so charming about this man, or boy, that i couldnt seem to let go of. We had a year filled with laughter and bliss, continiuously making me fall even further.But i shouldve seen it coming. It was simply too good to be true. His eyes a seductive shade of green never left my innocent face even for a minute. Which at the time i admired because i thought this was love and that it was normal for your partner to constantly keep checks on you but these controlling, insecure characteristics of his later played to my submission. It soon became that the things i cherished about this boy terrified me the most. His warming breath, now furious, breathing down hot air on my naive face as he vents out his anger. His alarming hands bursting with veins primed to hit me, his once gorgeous eyes screaming hate for me as i stood there unaware of what i had actually done. 

I would sit here and amaze you with all the loving and caring memories we shared but after making the biggest decison of my life, i am now aware of the beastly, immature monster i was prepared to spend the rest of my life with. However i was not the strong and mature woman i am today and couldnt find a way to halt the pain i was feeling. But i had come to the brink of my endurance and decided this was enough. Little did i know this was to be the most influential decison of my soon to be contented life...

After continious months of apologizing after abusing me, defending his innocence i finally saw the light. His once adoring face i admired was now cracked and scarred with pain. The pain of losing the best thing that had ever happened to him. I once sat in the pity of my own endurance, however i soon discerned it was him i pity- becoming the monster he had become. I could get out this horror just fine, but he would be bewildered with his enraged obsession he has to control women. I just hope for his sake he can deal with his own demons because i do not need him anymore even though i once could not see any other way.

What we as women need to keep in mind is that we were made to love but also have reciprocal love back. Our biological needs itself prove that we love. We love what we care about and those we care about. However we cant let that ideology fool us into allowing ourselves to be treated in a way thats less than we deserve. Being infatuated with a monster can cause blinding 
curtains to our eyes and even though we may feel unfaithful and wrong  by admitting that its time to let go we must. For the sake of ourselves. Letting go is the hardest part of loving someone unconditionally but sometimes it is best to admit that you are both best parted. 


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