Lots of Laughs Vol.1: EXTENDED CUT

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
An extended version of my previous book.

Submitted: January 12, 2017

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Submitted: January 12, 2017

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How do you think the unthinkable?

With an ithberg.

 

What's brown and sticky?

A stick.

 

How many apples are in an apple tree?

All of them.

 

What's the best Christmas present in the world?

A broken drum. You just can't beat it!

 

What do you call a bunch of cows stampeding through the city?

Udder chaos.

 

What does a pirate need after a long journey across the sea?

Some R and R.

 

How many dead people are in a cemetery?

All of them.

 

The toilet at the police station got stolen. They tried to investigate, but they had nothing to go on.

 

Before you insult someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, you're a mile away and you've got their shoes!

 

 

What do you get when you cross a turtle and a porcupine?

A slowpoke.

 

What do you call a dwarf with telepathy who's escaped prison?

A small medium at large.

 

Why did Dracula quit art class?

Because he could only draw blood.

 

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Army.

Army who?

Are me and my friends invited to your party?

 

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

I'm a pile up.

I'm a pile up who?

No you're not, don't be so hard on yourself!

 

TOMMY: Mommy, can I lick the bowl?

MOMMY: No, Tommy, you have to flush like everybody else!

 

What do a tell-marketer and a boomerang have in common?

They always come back!

 

Inventions we need:

Boomerang trash; so trash always comes back to the person who threw it away.

 

What's the tallest building in the world?

A library. It has the most stories.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


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