The Less You Think, The Better

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic

Submitted: January 30, 2017

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Submitted: January 30, 2017



You're not afraid.Towering over the city's normal for you. You do it every night, trying to solve your life's mysteries. Observing your life as if it's a challenging gaem that you messed up on. You saved the game just before the enemy attacked you, leaving it to kill you every time you open the load file. You obeserve your life like a hopelessly huge knot that needs to be cut to untiied. But in the process it destroys the string. But don't you want that? 

After years of trying to make sense of it, you realised who tied the first knot. It had to be the reason why you were here. The nuesences that watched you up until you were six, when your mom walked away with disgust tying up her frowed eyebrows.They never really have a choice. That's what everyone said, acting as if they were the victums. Did they really not have the choice? You noticed the lottery tickets pill up like the bills. Your big hazel eyes watched the cigarettes and bottles clutter up. Your small ears listened as your parents fought, telling each other they weren't ready to have a child. It's okay. You were never really ready for life. 

It was a big change. One day you were living with those horrible people, then the next angels saved you from the storm. Your grandparents took you in and loved you until you couldn't stand their love. Too bad you had to ruin it. They told you not to try. They told you to listen to them. And how do you respond? You did it for the thrill, the rush. Your heart was finally beating and you felt alive. Didn't you tell them you wouldn't? 

You learned their lesson. Once you came back from the party, they could tell. Now the only people in this world that actually loved you don't trust you anymore. Now you're stuck in awful situations that you can't get out of. Ones that you wanted to avoid before. You tried so hard to be good. You tried so hard to be perfect, but all of that was washed away with one single act. You said you were the good kid. What are you now? 

When your eyes land on perfect people, you fell sick. How you envy those poster children. The ones that never had a speck of imperfection. Maybe if you tried hard enough. Maybe if your parents actually loved you. But, oh well. You just have to face it. You're the bad example. The thing parents are afraid their children will turn out to be like. You can feel their eyes staring you down at school. They smile, because they made it. They aren't like you. 

So what do you say? What will you do? You know the only way to stop this is by jumping off the edge into the lights of the cars passing by on the street millions of miles below you. 

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