looking for friendship letter-a woman's weekly article

looking for friendship letter-a woman's weekly article

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Submitted: January 31, 2017

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Submitted: January 31, 2017

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Looking for friendship letter

I am as happily married as is possible. But there is a void in my life since my childhood guy friends have moved away, after a 30 year friendship. Try as I might I cannot just be satisfied with my husband. It is affecting my happiness and perfect mental health. I used to be connected to people earlier who would help me out with developing male friendships. I have there taken the step of asking my friendship network through email for help. Somebody tall and handsome like my friend. Pure friendship, so should be attractive in a non flamboyant sort of way. It would fill the void in my life. Hope my prayers are answered.  I have plenty of impersonal relations when I go for walks but I am looking for someone local, not necessarily to hang out with , but someone I know by email and see when I go out. You and laxmikanth fill the void but I don’t see you often enough.  I understand your difficulties in communicating with me but I know you do welcome my letters.  Doesn’t have to be such a close friendship as it is with you, but someone nice and good looking who I can talk to. Can you help me ?

At this stage in my life I am fine for the most part. It’s not going to happen.  I just pray I end up with close personal friends.  Maybe movement to music will help with that. A few close friends is what I am looking for.  I have lived in this city for over 16 years.  I have friends all over the place. But no one who talks to me. But then I think, what is there to say. I unfortunately am not a good conversationalist on a everyday basis.  I want close personal friends, those who talk to me, somebody closer to my age.  I had that with Laxmikanth for a few months when he was here. Unfortunately he has moved away, back to the USA.  And I live in Australia. At my age  I guess impersonal relationships is what I should be happy with.  So now what do I do.  Just become more stoic. So that’s the answer. (Stoicism is a school of Hellenistic philosophy that flourished throughout the Roman and Greek world until the 3rd century AD. Stoicism is predominately a philosophy of personal ethics which is informed by its system of logic and its views on the natural world. According to its teachings, as social beings, the path to happiness for humans is found in accepting that which we have been given in life, by not allowing ourselves to be controlled by our desire for pleasure or our fear of pain, by using our minds to understand the world around us and to do our part in nature's plan, and by working together and treating others in a fair and just manner.

Here is what Epictetus has to say about that general point:

“Provoked by the sight of a handsome man or a beautiful woman, you will discover within you the contrary power of self-restraint. Faced with pain, you will discover the power of endurance. If you are insulted, you will discover patience. In time, you will grow to be confident that there is not a single impression that you will not have the moral means to tolerate.” (Enchiridion 10)

)

I have always lived that way. After all I an American Brahmin.  Not for  the first time in my life I am finding life a bit difficult. But I will cope, I will survive.  I don’t need a prop. ! 

**********The End********


© Copyright 2017 Katherine Kelly Lang. All rights reserved.

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