To Dream Again

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Flash Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
This story is all about a girl's coping mechanism with abuse.

Submitted: February 08, 2017

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Submitted: February 08, 2017

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When someone hurts you bad enough, it stops hurting at all. You shut your eyes, and you shut your ears, and all your senses turn off, just for a moment, and you relax. You don't cry. You don't shout. And no matter how loud the world may sound, you don't hear. And no matter how bright the world may look, you don't see. And your therapist tells you, that you can't pretend to not hear and to not see, and to not feel, that you have to face your problems. But he doesn't understand. It's not pretend. The only things that are pretend to you is the shape of your mother's mouth screaming words that used to cut into you like knives, and the shape of your fathers body, coiling back, yeilding a bat, or a pot, or a spoon, striking at you and your brother, and your sister. But now you don't hear, and you don't feel. It all feels distant. Like when you're half awake, but you're still dreaming. And just like that it's over. You hear the distant sound of your mother's car driving away. She got tired of screaming at you, and is off to go scream at her employees. You see the distant shape of your father, taking his dog out for a walk, whom he loves so much more than you. Your older sister has disapeared into her room, and your younger brother has run off to your aunts house. Your bother was always your aunts favourite. And you, as usual walk slowly up the stairs into the bathroom, and run yourself a bath, where you then sit for hours. You can't forgive and you can't forget, so you do what you can, and you stow away the last dream in the back of your mind, knowing that one just like it could arrive at any moment. And you drift off into your new reality.

You wake up on the other side. The smell of the grass, and dirt, just after it rains. The sun just rising over the ocean, turning the sky into a marvelous pink. You sit, your feet burried in the sand, the salty air blowing in from the ocean slightly scratching your face, but you don't care. Your hair is blown back by the wind, not in your face, it's never in your face here. You know that you will eventually go back, so you make the most of what you have, and you stand up, and walk back to the cabin. A tall shape get's out of the bed, and walks over to you. His blond hair so soft, and his green eyes so beautiful you can't even describe. He runs a hand through your hair, and kisses your lips softly. He takes your hand, you walk together along the beach. And before you know it, it's all over.

 

You wake up underneath the water, struggling. You manage to get to the surface. You get out of the bathtub, and wrap yourself in a towel. You get dressed. Not saying a word, or making a sound. You know that tomorrow, all of this will start over again. And you just can't wait to dream again.

 

 


© Copyright 2017 Josie J.. All rights reserved.

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