dear feminists, please ignore fighting a non-existent fight

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an essay i decided to write about a subject i'm really passionate about.

Submitted: February 21, 2017

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Submitted: February 21, 2017



Okay, so before I make any point of consequence, let me highlight the fact that men are not responsible for the fact of many women making marriage as their topmost priority. Again, let me also say that it is unarguably clear that when it comes to the gender that would do any and everything to have the all-important ring, it is none other than feminine. And it goes without mentioning that mainly due to this situation, many men have exploited, maltreated and will continue to do same despite the fact that feminists and other female activist groups are still on the rise in a bid to fight a non-existent fight.

Patriarchy society has been an age old phenomenon. I am a Christian who  believes and trusts in the bible, because “Every scripture is God breathed”…. (2 Tim 3:16). So if the bible says “for the head of the wife is the husband and the head of the husband is God” (1 Cor 11:3), I unreservedly believe. The bible seeks to ultimately make God the foundation of every relationship. Therefore if the man, who is the head of the family doesn’t make God his head, the whole foundation will obviously be weak.  God says “If you seek first his kingdom and righteousness, all other things-including prosperous marriage et al. - will be yours" (Matt 6:33)…. And that, I think, is what women should be considering vividly before accepting any proposal in the first place, before all the other checklists  because with a weak foundation, you can attend all the counseling sessions around the globe, but it would come to nothing.

Over two thousand years of human existence AD. , One fact has been sacred. Everything has got its strengths and weaknesses. Indeed, even the most important things that have defined our way of life, thinking and existence as a people have got its corresponding challenges.

Education is one of the most important tools that have transformed our existence. Without education, how could a child of a kayaye aim to achieve a similar end with that of te president's?  In fact, how could we have reasoned to abolish some of the wicked outmoded cultural practices? And would the world have benefitted from the brains of women, who were only a reserve for the kitchen in yesteryears? Oh! how  good a tool education has been. But just like every other thing, too much of it can yield both morally and spiritually regressive consequences.

Feminism is a product of education. I know it is a movement that is legal. Per its definition, the movement is said to fight for gender equality. It aims to achieve equality of rights and interests for women.  What I don’t know is whether it is a religion. Quite frankly, I sometimes get awed by some of the trivialities this movement sometimes takes up. But I guess it is sometimes some of the consequences of too much reasoning resulting from education. Education sometimes makes people challenge any and everything including biblical, Quran, common sense and many other sound principles and doctrines.

I would be the least bit surprised if in future, women begin to fight for men to carry babies halfway their pregnancies. Indeed I would be more shocked if it doesn’t happen considering their agitation for men to share household chores with them and protest for women to ignore the adoption of their husband's  surnames after marriage among a legion of other trivialities. Today, feminists are even fighting for their fellows to walk around virtually naked because we don’t complain about the dress code of men. Oh how pathetic could this fight be?

It is never wrong for a lady to pray for marriage. For me, a serious marriage seeking woman is the one who seeks the face of God, and not the one who has made it a point to fight and defend her fellow women irrespective of their wrong deeds in the name of equality.  If men are engaged in any particular bad deed and no one complains, does that justify that of women’s? For me, I think the society favors women ahead of men. That is why women get a lot of backlash when they goof. And that is also why they get outrageous and overwhelming acclaim even when they do little.

It is a common saying that men are moved by what they see and women are moved by what they hear. But the earlier women understand this phrase and realize they must be ruling the world, the better. Beautiful ladies are more effective tools to men destruction than guns. Women have all the privileges men have.  And if we should talk about discrimination here, men are the worse victims.

All things being equal, if a guy goes to an interview with a beautiful lady, the lady would be chosen ahead of the guy. Hard work is a preserve for men. It is acceptable for an uneducated lady to marry a well-educated and rich guy, but it is almost ominous for the reverse to be given a thought. There are so many moves that are quiet discriminatory towards men. But is there any movement for men empowerment? A resoundingly NO! So why women?

It all goes back to the point of most women craving for marriage and, the fact of many of them adopting a laid-back attitude in life for successful men to marry and absorb them of their predicament that has given men the upper hand. Ironically, most of these feminists openly oppose men and condemn gullible women, but when they finally find their Mr. Rights, their movement sadly becomes “each one for himself, God for us all”.

I have to be decorous here, if I want to underscore the fact that many practice feminism due to their present precarious situation. But as the Akan adage goes “if you don’t sell your disease, you won’t get it’s medicine” so if for whatever reason you are single, I think you should open up to people and pray and believe.

For me, there is no issue anywhere. If indeed there is any issue we must be fighting for women, its to change the mindset of women about marriage, which, i think, is nearly an impossible mission. But women must know that to succeed in life there are three things, namely; prayer, hard word and determination. Protesting against men, opposing them and fighting a non-existent fight are obviously going to prove futile! King Solomon once said “an open rebuke is better than a hidden love” feminists should redefine themselves! I love women, and I love you!

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