True Stuff

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: True Confessions  |  House: Booksie Classic
Everyone has a lesson to learn, we all learn the same lesson but each in our own way, some lessons come hard. Everyone's story is unique and when we tell our stories we hope our loved ones take heed in hopes they don't make the same mistakes. This is one I share with my daughters

Submitted: March 04, 2017

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Submitted: March 04, 2017

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This is what I call my Marie story.I think in some shape or form we all have our own similar Marie story, here's mine:

When I was 15 and going into high school I didn't have alot of friends.With one hand, I could count on my fingers how many friends I had (or thought I had). It was at that time that they began to stray. I did what I felt I had to just to keep up with them. Till I started getting getting bored, and doing my own thing.

I reasoned I didn't need anyone to get in trouble with, I found it fine on my own.When I went off on my own it was then that I got my 1st boyfriend and my 1st kiss ( I leave this part out when I shared this story with my kids, they only know about Marie). My grades began to slip, I hated my teachers and cut their classes.

Needless to say I didn't make it to the next grade and I dropped out. After a few months of being at home and enduring my mom's blatant hate for me(at least thats what I thought it was) my big brother began to talk to me seriously about life.Noone had ever bothered to talk to me like that, and I listened to everything he said. I cut off those bad influences and started fresh in a different school.I was ready to turn a new leaf.

It was there,at this new school, that I raised my grades back up and actually started enjoying learning again.Something I'd missed since...well leaving elementary.I had showed my mom my report cards reflecting that change but she turned on me.My home life sucked (so I thought) it sucked dead wet dead dog balls.Pretty extreme, hu? LOL.

Then I met Marie.

I had her for a few classes, and to be truthful I was kinda jealous of her cause she still possessed something I wish I still had for myself- Innocence.She was very pretty, and very smart. She was nothing like the other girls I had known up to this point in my life.They were very self absorbed, vindictive and demanding of attention.I didn't want to be around people like that.So we became friends pretty quick. I shared with her what I'd been up to and the trouble I'd gotten into and she quietly listened and never judged. I soon found out my best friend Marie was hiding her own sad secret.

It happened one morning when my mom and I had gotten into an arguement about her driving me to school. She just didn't feel it necessary anymore.I had dropped out and now to her I was just wasting my time with going back.So I told her that she didn't need to anymore then.I would find my own way. It became very apparent to me that she didn't believe in me anymore. I only got one shot with her and blew it. She told me that I just needed to get my G.E.D and get a job already. It hurt me,there was no chance for redemption in her eyes.I smarted off to her, for her not to be surprised if I didn't come home that day.

The rest of the day at school went to shit for me or I just stayed in a very bad mood. Marie noticed and offered an ear to me. But I didn't wanna bog her down with my problems. She asked me if I wanted to hang out with her after school, that we could walk home till we had to part ways. I told her I wasn't going home (that was the 1st time I'd ever considered running away).She said then for me to go hang out with her at her house, maybe then I would be ready to share with her what was bothering me.

That afternoon I was supposed to stay after school and rehearse for a school play that I was to be in.A very minor role with no speaking parts, but if it kept me from home for awhile it was worth it.So I was skipping practice too.We walked away from school talked away about anything and everything. When we got to her house,it all changed. Gone was the sweet smile of my friend and her easy laugh.Something took root in her heart that seemed to age her. See, I was the 1st friend according to her, that she ever brought home.She too didn't have many friends,tho I could never imagine why.

Marie had two younger sisters. A 12 yr old that was disabled and a 9 yr old. The 12 yr old was still in diapers,she couldn't walk she slid across the floor if she wanted to get around,drank from a bottle and couldn't talk.She mumbled stuff in which a way a baby would and threw the same tantrums and begged for attention that became very clear to me she only got from Marie.And when Marie got home from school, her sister became her sole responsibility.Along with the tasks of havng to help cleanup and cook.While her disabled sister slid around the house with the help of a baby's walker that she pushed along the way and her 9 yr old sister did her own thing.

But for this one day that I was there much to the surprise and disapproval of her mother,she left her alone for awhile.Marie shared with me that she had an older sister that didn't live with them, that she had moved far away.She showed me her sister's modeling portfolio and shared proudly her sisters pictures.Marie told me that her sister told her once she was finished with school that she would try her best to get her into modeling as well. My heart sank for my friend Marie, cause she said she didn't feel like she could leave her mom like that,and she worried still for her younger siblings.What a beautiful heart she had.

And me? I felt very ashamed of myself. Cause even though me and my mom didn't see eye to eye, and she's always kept me at arms distance from her,nothing that was going on at home bad for me nohow compared to the hell my beautiful friend Marie had to endure once she got home everyday. When I walked home that night, I stayed thinking about her. And when I got home one of my older sisters was staying over and was waiting up for me.She was watching some late nite talk show.

She asked me where I'd been? And that mom was very pissed at me. I shrugged my shoulders and told her I didn't care. I couldn't wait to sit down and talk to my sister about my friend Marie.See, I han't seen my older sister in awhile so it was a treat for me to even see her there. My mom came out of her room and stared me down.I stayed staring back, wondering what was she gonna do or say to me. She had already turned against me there was nothing else worse she could do or say to me that would or could break me.

I felt the sting of her slap across my face that sent my eyeglasses flying across the living room. Then she slapped me again and this time I was the one who flew the other way. I picked up my glasses and refused to cry.Hey, that shit hurt, but I knew better than to raise my fist at my mom.My religious tutelage I'd received along time ago from my dad's sisters told me God would shorten the days of my life if I ever raised my fist to my mom.Well it seemed a shame to try out that theory when I was still young and yearning to be free.Sure lets see how far that would take me.Didn't wanna die young.But I be damned if I was gonna let her see me cry, cause once I showed those tears,I showed a weakness in me that she would know she could get to me all the time.I was not about to give her that satisfaction.So being the smart ass that I was I asked her if she was done.I looked her straight in the eye,unflinching till she turned and walked back to her room.

Needless to say, my sister registered shock across her face. I threw myself next to her on the couch and she tried to keep from laughing.What else could one do after seeing some shit like that, right?She asked me if it hurt? With a wry grin I nodded my head but pulled up my finger to my lips to silence her.She asked me again,where I'd been. That's when I told her about Marie, and what I learned from all this.I told her mom's slap didn't mean that much to me compared to seeing what kinda life my friend had waiting for her at home.I thought I had it bad.No way,not even close!! I know my mom heard us,heard me.Her bedroom door was wide open. I hope she did hear. But she never spoke of it.

So I share this story of Marie to my girls,so they know "Hey,you think u got it bad? There's someone out there that has it worse.

And the difference between my mom and how our relationship was back then,compared to the one I have with my daughters now, is I'm always talking to them and encouraging them and telling them they may slip here and there but I always got their back, no matter what. I love my kids to the moon and back.They are my world.

I often think about Marie and wonder how she is and hope she's doing well. We all have people we dread seeing from our past, be it an old boyfriend an old nemesis or that group of snotty girls.Then there's always that one you wouldn't mind seeing again.I have a few of those.So few I can still count them on one hand.


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