Adoration

Adoration

Status: Finished

Genre: Romance

Houses:

Details

Status: Finished

Genre: Romance

Houses:

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Summary

this story is a true story about love and anger along with loss and separation.
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Summary

this story is a true story about love and anger along with loss and separation.

Content

Submitted: April 04, 2017

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Content

Submitted: March 05, 2017

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His eyes twinkled as he saw the beauty of his crush. She had blonde hair and he couldn’t tell who she was. It was like Romeo and Juliet in high school as the guy thought. He had the personality of a lovestruck man who had the eyes of a twinkling star. The eyes started to twinkle more and more than a light on the band room's ceiling. He told his friend who was sitting next to him. The boy told his friend about how cute a girl looks and the friend looked at her she was sparkling in the window light but the friend had no interest in her as he was dating a friend. The bou had his eyes on his so called mistress. He fell head i\over heals for her. In her mind she had no boyfriend. At the moment she wasn’t looking for a relationship. He wanted to give his love to her and yet sometimes he had told friends that he’s gay but he has this urge to try to date women. He seemed to be a bisexual boy. He thought that would be it. She looked so radiant. She looked like an angel but she wasn’t seemed to be the person that would be right to him. He was in a dizzy temptation for how cute the girl is. He would be in the temptation for the entire day as the day would progress it was his love for her that he definitely wanted. Love wasn’t was the answer that the boy thought but the answer was there. So the next few days of being entranced in a temptation, the boy would be in love for what he wanted. He would be like “Aw she’s so cute. I never thought I’d see a true beauty till this night. He was writing love poems to her. Even though he would say “I’m gay or anything else.” He didn’t know if he should talk to her. He was swearing that he was gay. But he saw something in her that he loved. He wrote love poems while listening to love songs and would draw pictures with her and him in Paris or any other romantic place that everyone has heard. He managed to gather the courage to go up to her and ask her out on a date. He wrote a letter to her describing who he is. He loved her and he wasn’t sure if she would return the same. He wasn’t interested in the backlash that he may get for dating her. Her eyes were twinkling like a star and once again he fell in love. He wanted to ask her so badly but it was too much. So before the day he asked her, he wrote a letter describing who he was and why he loves her. When he wrote that he showed it to his friend and the friend said that he liked it and he may have a huge chance. He made her laugh and smile. He felt like he would have a chance and yet he was still worried about the backlash. He wouldn’t care he would want to date her. As he would get ready for his second period class, he looked in the mirror and said to himself “I got this. Please have her say ‘yes’.” He went and met with his friend and was flying 50 feet above the ground. He felt like he was ready.

“You got this” the friend said. He nodded as to say ‘yeah I got this.’ She arrived and sat with them. He looked at his friend and smiled like ‘i’m doing it.’ He got the letter out and took a deep breath. He said to her “This is for you.” He got up and left. He powered into the bathroom and splashed water in his face. He looked in the mirror and said “Am I really doing this?” He was. He was actually crying on the inside. He couldn’t believe that he was doing this. He looked at himself and said “This isn’t you. You’ve said that ‘you’re gay.’” He was pulling his iphone out and plugged his headphones in and listened to “Never Forget.” from Halo 3. He stayed in there for about 5 minutes when he got out he walked back and saw her just sitting there on her phone not talking to anyone. He felt like he was ready. He knew that he probably knew he wasn’t but he felt like it had to be done. He walked back and sat right next to her. The friend was on his computer. He was battling what he wanted to do that. He was just making it harder and harder for him.

“I got to do it. No I can't. Come on you dummy. Be a man.” he thought. He then turned to her direction.

“Hey, I was wondering if you’d go on a date with me?” he sad to her. She looked at him in amazement and said

“Sure” she responded. He was taken back by this and was shocked. They both exchanged phone numbers and they parted ways as there was pep assembly in Hyworth for Cancer Awareness. The friend and him hung out as the pep assembly came on. He was flying 14 feet above the ground. He was happy but at the same time he was like crying on the inside because of what she said. She said yes to a gay guy and she didn’t know it. He was kind of hurt because during the assembly he went to the bathroom and poured water on his face.

“What am I putting myself into? I know that I’m gay. I know I am. I may be bi but I don’t know. Life’s confusing.” he thought to himself.  It seemed that the world had just stopped and the so called God place her in front of him. But he didn’t believe in that because of how bad those people are. Religion people. He had his theory on what Religious people do and he just felt like there was no such thing. He looked up the mirror and saw what kind of person he was. A person who is about to put someone’s life at stake. He had all the ideas where people would label her as “The Gay Guy’s Pin Cushion.” or “The Gay’s slut.” He had those ideas and was more worried about what people would label her if anyone found out. Even though the friend knew that it was happening, he planned on silencing anyone who knew so that it would be kept secret. Not only was this crazy but he was so worried. He went back to the pep assembly to join in the fun as one of the counselors had cancer, it was to honor her. He arrived as it was done and the friend had his stuff and he went back to class.


 

That following night, she texted him and they discussed their interests. They seemed to click a lot. He still was pretty upset and yet she didn’t know. They discussed how their day went and all that crap couples do. The same night it took a lot to get his mind off of what was about.

“There’s nothing I can do. There’s nothing a bitch like me can do.” He thought to himself. She probably was like
‘I got a boyfriend, i got a boyfriend.” She was probably like she loved how she had someone to call hers. But that wasn’t the case. He felt like an actor. He’s seen a ton of plays and how good they were but he hated that he saw that it was mostly fake. Just like the relationship he had to keep up. But he was pretty torn up that he did something like that. He thought he was bi but he was still figuring out who he was.


 

She was like texting her friends saying “I have a boyfriend now.” Some friends were like ‘that’s great.” But she went to a sleepover with one of his friends who was a girl. She showed the friend the letter he gave her. The friend texted him and that sparked a scandal of him being bi.

“He’s Gay that’s what he’s been saying.”the friend said.

“Did he have a boyfriend before me?” she asked.

“Yes”

She grabbed her phone and asked if he had a boyfriend before and that caused him to get all defensive because she found out his secret. The friend got most of the heat because he thought he could trust her.

“What the hell is wrong with you.” he texted to the friend

“Dude chill.” the friend responded. The whole thing was like he was being accused of something that he didn’t do. It made him upset. But he decided to find a way to relax. He was recommended that he listen to rain sounds. He listened to rain sounds and calmed down a little. But it was not enough.

 

She was just doing girly stuff as she was hanging with her friends. They were discussing about boys and many other things. She was happy. The next day when school was back in session, she saw him again. He seemed to be in pain but she didn’t see much of it. She thought he was ok since he did play football. But he had back pains, headaches and many other things because of stress. The stress seemed to be heavy on him. He never shared the info with anyone because he wasn’t ready for anyone to know what was happening in his life. Considering that his girlfriend didn’t show any interest. Neither did his friend. He didn’t show interest and the band director saw that he was in pain and decided to help him out.

“Hey, are you ok?” the band director asked.

“Yeah just had a rough couple of nights.” he responded.

“How so?

‘Well I’ve been having headaches and back problems and I don’t know why. It’s been hard for me to keep up with some things. But i did manage to get a girlfriend.”

“That’s awesome.” the band director said. But still he wouldn’t reveal what happened that he really did. He took a whip from the garage of his mom’s house and he whipped himself. It left scars on his back.

“It had to be done. I’m not who I truly am. Please God Kill me.” he would repeat half the time. He really knew that he was making a mistake and to think he was bi. He hated that idea. He was struggling to make ends meet as he would be able to not tell her.


 

They started to talk again that same day after school and Valentine’s Day was coming up. Saying that they would be Valentine’s. He was happy and she was too. It was the beginning of February when the relationship officially started. They would talk and talk by text and see each other in band class and they would have lunch together. He would meet her friends and he would hang out with his friends for lunch. He would move on to see that she was on her computer. She seemed happy. He met some of her best friends and they would hang out for a while before going to their next class. The classes were freshman level classes and they were planning on celebrating Valentine’s Day soon enough. Even though it was like two weeks away. Ther had a concert in between of Valentine’s Day. The concert was like a pop festival where all music groups combined together and they played very cool pop songs. The concert band that both of them were part of, played “Godzilla Eats Las Vegas” by Eric Whitacre. They also played a Michael Jackson tribute where the choir came and sang the songs that they were playing. The concert would start out with Jazz band and then so many others while concert band was the very last one. So while all of that was in plan, the Valentine’s celebration was supposed to be on Thursday because the actual Valentine’s day was on Saturday. She said that she had a skiing trip that day with her family and he was planning on just doing what he did best. Play video games. But before the concert was going to start, he ran by Wal-mart and got her a teddy bear that had a heart in it’s hand. He was satisfied with it. But she was kinda satisfied as she was checking out other guys. There was a guy in her Bass Clarinet group she had a thing for. Yet He didn’t notice it. But the next day, he gave her the Valentine’s gift, she seemed happy.


 

The Saturday that Valentine’s day was on, she said that the skiing trip got cancelled and she was available. She suggested that they both go see a movie. One suggestion was a rated R movie but they changed their minds to one that was pg-13. He was pretty excited and kinda scared. She was going to bring one of her friends. He arrived a few hours early and decided to buy some things and the time they were going to see each other was 12:00. He was walking around the mall that the movie theater was at. He was feeling confident. She was happy that this was happening and also that a friend would be there. But also this was their first date so it was kind of nerve wracking for the both of them. They ran into each other at one of the stores that was near the movie theater. They bought the tickets and they went to the theater. After the movie they were officially a couple. But to her that seemed cool. To him he was happy but at the same time it was killing him to see himself this way. The next few days they were seen eating lunch together. So it seemed that it was going great for them. They were telling each other everything. During their first and only date (shocking) she said that she was hoping that he would hold her hand. Of course that didn’t happen. They seemed to be happy but when March came, she broke up with him and that caused him to go into a depression that seemed so bad it took a ton of people to calm him down. She said that she was also crying when that happened. A friend asked if he was ok because of what happened. The friend was pretty worried about him. He told her everything and said that he’s now Gay. The friend accepted him and then he would go on to avoid her for a year. But when they were in Band Class they saw each other. He seemed sick to his stomach and still she was looking happy and sad at the same time. He hated that that happened. He felt like he hurt and ruined her life. Because people he trusted told her “He’s gay.” She was convinced that he was bisexual. It hurt him every single goddamn night and he would bawl his eyes out.

“Why? WHY DID I DO THIS STUPID THING MY GOD. YOU’RE STUPID. YOU MORON YOU’RE STUPID.” he would say to himself. She seemed the same way. Feeling really bad for him and also it made her avoid people. But for a year they avoided each other. But never in a million year did he say that he wanted to talk to her again. For a year they avoided each other.


One day, she called him again. It brought them together as best friends and it was what they seemed to settle. They were terrible together but they’re better apart. So life seemed to go better for the both of them.


© Copyright 2017 Cherry S. Mercury. All rights reserved.

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