one of the greatest miracles

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
this is a personal piece i started and somewhat finished. i would love some feedback on it.

Submitted: March 05, 2017

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Submitted: March 05, 2017

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Lesley Perez

“One of the greatest miracles”


 My parents always used to tell me all the memories we had together when I was little. They used to tell me I loved to dance around with a sombrero on my head. I used to love to spend my time outside playing with whatever I found lying around the ground. We used to watch all the home movies we had. I would laugh at every single thing I would do. I loved reconnecting with myself for a little while. Like any other person, I imagined my childhood was as normal as can be. But as I got older and was able to understand, subtle details kept creeping out on me. For one, I never had a clue why I would always have to go to the doctor. I would always look at the old photo albums we had and wonder why I had little to no hair on my head. I guessed my parents shaved my head. So I gave it no attention. I still remember the taste of this milky-white drink that was given to me at every doctor visit. I usually would get flashbacks of random things in my mind but it would never make sense to me. Many things didn’t make sense as I was growing up, but of course I didn’t think it was something serious that I needed to talk about with my parents. Then things started to get even more strange. I remember I was 14 years old, I came home from school and my mom told me we were going to the city for another doctor appointment. When we got there, we entered a massive colossal sized building, and went up to the 6th floor. Once the elevator opened, I stared at the sign that was in front of us for a good 10 seconds. I stayed quiet the whole time I was there with my mom. I didn’t care to ask what was going on, I wanted to go home. The doctors proceeded to take their blood tests on me and all other doctor stuff. They took me to another room and discussed my health issues with me like all the other visits at Nyack. When I was done with the check up, they called my mother to a room by herself. I had to wait in the waiting with other patients and their parents. For some reason. I felt myself tensing up. I had the urge to let every single tear I had trapped inside for a few years now. I felt the room getting smaller and thought everyone had their eyes locked on me. To this day, I still remember everything. My mother finally came out and I was called in, and she had a look on her face as if she was sorry for something. Dr. Kelly was my all time favorite person. She was the nicest doctor ever. She was basically part of the family. With her, it wasn’t a regular doctor visit. We always ended up talking about everything that was happening our lives. I would always see her at Nyack but she was at the city that day. She sat me down and pulled out a folder with my name on it and gave it to me. I began to read it. I couldn’t begin to explain to myself what I was reading. Dr. Kelly began to tell me the story. The story that everyone had kept from me since I was able to talk. Hearing what she was saying brought tears to my eyes. Everything that was hidden in my memories and thoughts were finally coming out and slapping me in the face. After that day, I remember crying myself to sleep on some nights. I had some trouble coping with news and balancing my health at the same time. I was sent to a social worker to talk and to let everything I was feeling out. Time went by and I felt so much better. I kept going back to the city for my annual appointments. They make you feel special. They usually hosted events in honor of cancer survivors and I would attend to each one. There was a point where I felt like I wasn’t alone by seeing other kids just like me so engaged. Every birthday that passed was and still is very special to me. I was given another year of life. I started to appreciate my life a bit more each year. I finally was 18 years old and had gotten the strength to ask my mom about what happened. I remember my mom describing all the little details from start to finish. All the doubts and questions in the back of my head were finally answered. I couldn’t believe the fact I had gone through all of that and that I couldn’t feel anything. “There was one time that the doctor came out and said to me that you were having trouble breathing” my mother said to me. “You were put on something to help you breathe and if you didn’t respond well to the treatment, it was your last night.” Hearing those words come out of my mother’s heart broke my heart but I kept listening. As she went on, I can see her tears gushing down the side of cheek. “We thought we were going to lose you, Lesley.”, she said to me. I bursted out in tears that were kept inside of me that I didn’t even know about. She gave me the warmest hug ever, holding on to me as if I was going to run. I appreciated my life and everyone that was a part of it. All the birthdays that passed, meant something much more than blowing the candles of your chocolate cake. This particular event in my life helped me understand more about myself. I understood the reasons of going to the doctors all the time. I had to open my eyes and start taking care of myself. I was given another opportunity at this beautiful thing we call life. The scars I have are a symbol of my strength. I was stronger of what tried to take me down. I used to think they were a constant reminder of the horrible part of my life I wanted to hide from the world. But they aren’t. “You’re one of the greatest miracles I have brought into this world.”, said my mother. Those words will forever have an impact on me and what I do in this life. I am determined to take advantage of the opportunity at life that I was given.


© Copyright 2018 Lesley. All rights reserved.

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