Buried with Regret

Buried with Regret

Status: Finished

Genre: Other

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Status: Finished

Genre: Other

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Summary

Short story about one of my biggest fears. Regret.
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Summary

Short story about one of my biggest fears. Regret.

Content

Submitted: April 03, 2017

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Content

Submitted: April 03, 2017

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 My heart isnt beating anymore i need to confess. Yet i didnt so i perished unto the battlefield. No more to be heard from me again. A forgotten spirit now buried 6 ft under. The flag of my country folded on my chest. Everyone started to respect me when i died but not when i lived. I’d rather be remembered by the things i’ve done than my death but who am i anymore. Im buried and my loved ones are weeping above me, saying things that theyve never said to me face to face. No ! they had to be all loving together above my bloody corpse talking about loving me when they never ever showed they did. I hate everone even the ones that carried me casket. I had to die to hear these sentimental words. I heard those words for the first time when im a bloody corpse! If i had a soul i would haunt them, i swear i would. If there was a god and a heaven I wouldve spit on all those ‘’loved ones’’ that died before me. If there was a devil i wouldve been his servant. I hear those prayers those are empty words to me. How could it be that once when i was alive those were the words that gave me hope and comfort. I believed in those words because i wanted them to be true. My existence was a bloody hell,  i prayed for those promises of something beyond me, something better. Right now in reality I can rot. Decaying and the maggots eating my dry and dire flesh. Im natures food. They shouldve burned me, i wanted it that way.

My body now full of ooze. Finally my body is filled with something, i always imagined it hollow, at least it felt hollow.

I wanted to love them. Those loved ones. But loving them hurt me. Those memories are filled with sorrows. Ive been taught that love hurts but it’s worthwile, it was worth the pain. I got bullets in my head for this thing so called love. The last thing i saw was a family and a happy one. I was about to be the hero but no.. i was the target, i was the fool who was temporarily blinded by stupidity in the worst scenario. I lost my life. 2 bullets in my head with my name on them. Where were those soldiers, where were my brothers and sisters. I was alone.. i thought id die alot older, with enough love to fill the hollowness. I fought to protect the ones and things that ive once so grown to love. For love i perished. And yes it hurts.

Now im an angry corpse and there is no god, there is nothing but my casket and earth and the bloody maggots. All ive believed in while i was alive is meaningless below ground. I couldnt even die happy, I couldnt even prove myself to anyone. I couldnt get what i wanted so i ll remain this angry corpse decaying and forgotten.

They may cry now but i have to cry for all eternity. They will soon forgot the sight of my fuckin grave. Did i really thought that the army would give me answers, to give me a noble life. No i died like a dog! And im buried like one too. The flag is useless when your dead, if only i could move, i wouldve shred it to pieces. I have to stay like this and all that is left is bone. I dont feel the honor in my veins. I lived a life that i wanted to change. I’m literally 6 feet under with only regret. It’s worse than those fuckin bullets.

 

Regret when your dead is a very real thing. I wish this regret on the loved ones above. I want them to feel it too!

I hate regret. 


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