An essay that isn't about him

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
. This wouldn’t be about his promises and his sweet embraces that kept on hunting me every night. This isn’t about the dreams we built while holding hands and watching the stars. This wouldn’t be about the memories I had with him while strolling along the beach. This wouldn’t be about him, this would be about something else.

Submitted: April 14, 2017

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Submitted: April 14, 2017

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This wouldn’t be about him. This would be about something else.  About something that would make me happy and will never bring pain to me. This is something that wouldn’t break my heart or wouldn’t ache my body. This wouldn’t be about him. Why? Because what we had is over. I’m now moving forward to something or someone that would give me a better perception through life. Not the “fairy tale like” that I had with him that I now realized is fake. This wouldn’t be about his promises and his sweet embraces that kept on hunting me every night. This isn’t about the dreams we built while holding hands and watching the stars. This wouldn’t be about the memories I had with him while strolling along the beach. This wouldn’t be about him, this would be about something else. This wouldn’t be about the spell he kept on casting to every girl he kisses or touches. This would be about my life. My own promises, dreams and memories. This one will be about me not him. I may be blind before, because I didn’t saw his flaws. All I saw is his long eyelashes, wet lips, muscular body and huggable arms. I may have failed to hear the ugly comments about him because all I heard is his voice. His voice that became my favorite song and my most wanted melody. But now I’m over those. Because I’ve been awakened. Awakened to the reality that he never loved me. I became able to erase the spell he cast on me that kept me on thinking and talking about him unlimitedly. Because I wouldn’t allow myself to cry again, I wouldn’t allow myself  to feel that kind of pain again, because my heart is now healing, it’s learning to forgive and soon I know it’ll forget. Because he’s a man with no bones, pure flesh, weak. He isn’t able to stand without a girl on his side. He kept on using stupid girls like me as his emotional punching bag to improve his manliness. But what he don’t know is, he’s just being a gay in front of us. So why waste time writing something about him? He’s not worth it, he’s not worth even a single thought. He doesn’t deserve to be loved. That’s why I stopped. Stopped thinking nonsense and start writing something inspiring, happy and positive. Because now I’m done being something that is considered “his”. Done being one of those stupid girls who keep on saying that they wouldn’t talk about him even if, they know, deep inside that they still will.


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