I'm Sorry

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
I'm just currently hurting, in a way I didn't think was possible.

Submitted: May 10, 2017

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Submitted: May 10, 2017

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When I first met you, you were broken too.

You were mean...really mean, but deep down...I knew you were sweet.

Like a sour patch I guess. That is my favorite candy.

I remember when things went completely left for me in a previous relationship,

you were there for me, whether you cared or not. You were there.

I told you everything. You comforted me. 

We already had a great friendship, but it started to develop into something more. 

Maybe because you saw more in me than what I saw in myself.

We talked for about a month, no title. Just bonding.

Then the most amazing thing happened, you asked me to be your girlfriend.

I shyly but happily said Yes! 

Our bond...it was something else. Something that was unbreakable, we did the unthinkable.

We met on twitter and after people giving me so much shit about it, i didn't care. What we had was real. 

I thought i had found the one. 

You understood me like no other. Loved me like no other. Valued me like no other. Comforted me like no other.

Our fights. They were so bad. We both had a temper. We both had such slick mouths. 

We hurt each other a lot, we broke each other a lot. 

I'm sorry.

I found myself saying that a lot. Even when I had nothing to be sorry for, I was sorry.

I thought i was what you needed. Maybe I once was, but maybe that has now changed.

Maybe you outgrew me. You don't seem to craze over me like you use to. The puppy love stage has ended. You're ready to leave so quickly.

I don't blame you, something happens every week, and it's my wrongdoings. 

My heart is crying. I've never had a heartbreak like this. It feels like I'll never recover.

I know that sounds dramatic, but have you ever had something happen to you and you just never go back to the old you?

Something so traumatic. Something that changed you. That's me right now. 

I feel terrible for messing up.

I'm sorry.

I don't mean to pick fights or maybe I do. I don't know what's wrong with me.

I had so many problems coming into this and now it feels like I've never gotten better.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for ruining your life. I'm sorry for ruining your days and nights.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for blaming you for my mistakes.

I'm sorry. 

I'm sorry for being so insecure that it led to unnecessary fights. 

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for never listening to you but always wanting to be heard.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for thinking I could trample over you and everything would be fine.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for being the crazy, psycho bitch you never wanted.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for not being normal. I'm sorry for making you fall in love with what you thought was me.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry you don't like me now. I'm sorry you don't want to be with me now. I'm sorry you want to throw over two years away. I'm sorry. 

I'm sorry and I hope you find someone who makes you happy and won't stress you the way I do.

Someone who won't complicate your already complicated life.

Someone who won't let you down or disappoint you.

Someone who is worth it.

I'm none of those things, you don't need to tell me, I already know.

I truly hope you find happiness even if it isn't with me. 

I'm sorry. 


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