I survived everything

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: True Confessions  |  House: Booksie Classic
A true story about my life and how I survived it.
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Submitted: May 12, 2017

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Submitted: May 12, 2017

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Every day we go trough something. It doesn't matter if it's bad or good because after a long day we just take a nice bath and go to bed. Next morning will be better, you will be full of life and you will survive.You have one of those bad days once or twice a month, maybe week. But what if that one day keeps repeating? Then what? Well, let me tell you how I did it.

Everything was great and my life had ups and downs until one period of my life. That period was the worst. It's like you're stuck in one bad day. The worst one. It started in 3th grade. Kids are mean. I was bullied alot. And I know, we were children and they can mess around but it wasn't like that. I was verbally and physically abused. Bullying kept going until highschool. I was a short, pale, blond, skinny girl. I had friends until everyone started teasing me.They would make fun of my height and they would often point out how skinny I was. I didn't care as much as I did in 8th grade. I was teased so much I would oftenfake being sick so I could stay home. Heres the deal, I wouldn't make such a big deal out of it if it didn't happen EVERY day. For four years I couldn't smile because my teeth weren't straight. For four years I couldn't wear a tshirt cause I was too thin or pale. For four years I would cry myself to sleep every night. One day one of my bullies told me I couldn't make a push up(we had P.E.). I was so angry that he makes me cry every single day and I slaped him. We started fighting. I knew how to fight and I beat him up. After that fight, more boys started talking to me but not for long. Everybody would still tease me and I couldn't wait highschool. I wanted to kill myself but I couldn't. I kept saying to myself that I will wake up one day and everything would be okay. I would cut myself with a razor blade. I didn't want to live another day like this. I kept asking myself what have I ever done wrong in my life that I deserve to live like this. Highschool finally came and I couldn't be happier. That summer my friends called me out to go to a club I said yes just so I could partly forget everything. They make me wear a dress and it actually look good on me. We drank a little bit and I felt somebody feeling me up I quickly turned around and it was my bully. He apologized and left home. In the morning I got a message from him and it said: sorry for last night, I had a couple drinks. after that he never looked at me. On the streets he would look away and ignore me. One time we had a chance to talk and he said that he feels like sh*t for teasing me all those years. I asked him what made him apologize to me and I could see a tear in his eye. He didn't say anything, just got up and left. After that he wrote me another message explaining me he gets bullied on daily basses and he just had to say sorry to everybody he hurt. 2 years after he committed suicide. In the note he told that he was bullied alot because of his looks. I just wish he didn't left that day and explaned me why he wasn't feeling alright. 

So whatever you are going trough just keep in mind it will go away. It will leave marks on you but you gotta stay strong. You can't just give up and take your life. And if you're teasing anybody, it doesn't matter how much you thing it won't hurt anybody, it will. We all feel insecure and you won't help by saying you don't like something on us. Just let it go. Keep your toughts for yourself, atleast the bad and mean ones. 

 

 


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