Somewhere Out There

Book by: A C

Reads: 2208 | Likes: 0 | Shelves: 0 | Comments: 2

Tygo Goodwine a nine year old visits a museum with his father when they both get abducted by the unknown, begin their journey somewhere out there.

Science Fiction love space time revenge

Chapter 1

That Awful Sunday

Chapter 1: That Awful Sunday “It’s funny how we remember our bad days more than our good ones.” Hello my name is Tygo Goodw... Read Chapter

Chapter 2

New Home

CHAPTER 2: THE NEW HOME Through that portal we landed on a spaceship. It was an apotheosis of modern art. Gigantic, enslaved with t... Read Chapter

Chapter 3

The Red Star

CHAPTER 3: THE RED STAR We were on our way to the red star. A week had passed since. My father and I were getting adjusted to our n... Read Chapter

Chapter 4

THE RUNDOWN

CHAPTER 4: THE RUNDOWN We began our rundown. As soon as we came out of the house the old woman laid on the floor. While the Alien r... Read Chapter

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Recent Comments

Spyguy

I like the idea of this... There are a few technical things I would recommend that you deal with; "I was just nine years old, who..."= Needs to be changed to something like this: "I was just a nine year old boy who..." (It doesn't flow as is)... "I understand back then why..." = Needs to be changed to: "I didn't understand back then..." Then your comment, "I do now" makes more sense!

Mon, May 15th, 2017 2:52pm

Author
Reply

Thank you so much for taking the time to read it. Yes it's still first draft i shall be making few changes on it. Thanks for the advice i shall work on it and i hope you will enjoy future chapters as well.

Mon, May 15th, 2017 11:51am

B Douglas Slack

I had quite a bit of trouble separating the tenses you use, AC. You skip from past to present and into future seeming at random. You need to make sure that paragraphs contain the same subject matter. Presenting two or more different ideas or objects in one paragraph detracts from the story.

It does seem promising, though.

Bill

Tue, May 16th, 2017 8:40pm

Author
Reply

Thanks for the feedback Bill. I guess i got lost in translation dealing with present and past detailing of telling the story, i shall work on the tense. I really appreciate you taking the time to read my story, hope you will enjoy future chapters.

Tue, May 16th, 2017 10:55pm