poetic suicide

poetic suicide

Status: Finished

Genre: Poetry



Status: Finished

Genre: Poetry



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Chapter1 (v.1) - Introduction

Chapter Content - ver.1

Submitted: June 03, 2017

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Chapter Content - ver.1

Submitted: June 03, 2017



Poetic Suicide


This is an art form of expression I use to slaughter those without the necessary tools to grasp my vocals

Each word is a display of my soul, mind, body, & heart

By allowing you all to see the inners of me

I simply expose what poetry means

Therefore, onto me the world can now see the fabric of space that I use

But this thing is making me vulnerable

As I can easily be consumed

By the whisper who whispers into the hearts of men from amongst men & jin alike

So in every sense of the word

The poetry that I use is detrimental to me

More so it’s suicidal

…but no honor in the dead only in the death

So this poetic suicide that I commit every time I pick up this pen

Is only so the world could know

That I am not an enemy

But simply a friend

00/00/0000 approximately



Cerebrate; Birth thru pain

A child cries while his mother is yelling for help. She gets louder & louder, every time the slap of the belt sounds against her body. She yells & begs the man in the room to stop.

 He can hear the breaking of pictures, the bumping against furniture. The yelling has turned into murmured sounds, thumps, & bumps. He hides under the table holding himself. He whispers “stop, stop, stop” repeatedly. -The Only Begotten Son- crying and snoting all over his clothes.

She comes bursting through the door. Battered and beaten, sweating and panting. “get a knife!” she yells. He doesn't move, fear has gripped him. -The Black Dove- “get a fucking knife” this time her voice is a growl. The man comes behind her and covers her mouth. He grabs for her hands but she struggles, she kicks and fights. He gets up and grabs the knife.

Fear in his eyes, he holds it tight in his palms. Walking straight towards the adults fighting. The woman twist and turns. She squirms out of his grip. A side step and quick maneuver puts her behind him. She pushes with her entire body weight. The man falls right on top of the boy and knife. He feels the warmth of blood flowing down his hand. -Exodus- The man moans and groans. Shock and fear in his eyes.

He stumbles to his feet, only to stagger into the woman. “good boy, good boy” she says reaching for the knife. He stands there with blood on his clothes. His face smeared with the life juices of the man. He looks at his hands with tears in his eyes. -Joker- he smiles while he cries.



Poetic Dreaming

An I know my people feel me but I don’t know if they love me

I’ve been praying all day n night that God sends me an angel

Instead of this money

While sitting in jail

Everything came to me as a daydream would

But it was more intense because I saw everyone’s face and name

Except one person cloaked in a hood

Every dude that I knew was there

Every broad & bitch I fucked was there

Every chick I loved & love was there

Even the one I’m in love with was there

Then pages of my poems appeared to acknowledge that my gift was there

To my relief my casket appeared & every fucking one of them disappeared

Still in the midst of this dream it brought no tears

And my vision turned around to show the cloaked figure was still standing there

Man or woman I don’t know

Because his or her face they never showed

But reprieve and joy came when they spoke;


They all left you & that was something I had already known, you acted as though they really cared but when you needed them most were they ever really there? When those voices approached they laughed & said you was making excuses while other of them found your burden as a nuisance. There are no conditions to unconditional unless the meaning of love is none nutritional, either way they’ve made it clear that you are but a memory in the hearts stream. I told you once don’t count on them & now that you’re dead you finally figured out what I mean! They may have loved you but they didn’t want you nor did they need you, they have no idea what it means to be a lover, chick, friend, or crew! So in casket I want you to ask them to say 3 simple words & it isn’t I love you!


With those words in my mind my vision became blurred

I turned around to where my body laid

I approached with nothing but fear & shock on my face

Truly it was my body lying in the dead man's bed

I thought I’d be happy

But I was scared when I saw I had a upside down smile on my face that was dead

If life’s a dream and deaths a nightmare

Than how did we get here?

And with the question the cloaked figure disappeared

And whispered one last thing into my ear


To want to be loved is fine

To want to be needed is unfathomable to my mind

To want to be wanted is a waste of time

Just as love and in love is completely different

Like God & father time

They come and go

But when that one comes that will stay

The others will know what they lost

And wish love was a game the never played!

The 3 words you want to hear is in this dream

And I’ll give you the words

So you place them on paper

And figure out what I mean

 03/06/2008 approximately




His Words to Me

I take a draw from the cigarette and straight air gets into my lungs

I guess that's God talking to me

He said listen to me son

I’m tired of seeing you roam these streets with nothing but your gun

I’m the one you can depend on

Its iight to lean on me since I’m the one

Have no fear I’ll be by your side when the darkest nights come

Who you know gives you more comfort

I’m your father & are you not my son?

I’m tryna see you with a holy Qur’an instead of a gun

I’m tryna see you as the old son I used to know

Instead of this new one

Why allow your own internal demons to cast away the angels I’ve sent for you

Sign after sign I’ve given to you

To prove to you there’s no one who can do the things I’ll do for you

You’ve allowed your mind to take over your heart

And that’s left you blinded

Once murder started then I just couldn't stand around like I’m blind...you dig

I gave you the suburban life

To leave you with nothing but suburban living

Still yet you found a way to get right back into the sinning

I am your next of kin

Your best friend I should be your reason for living

You’ve allowed this physical life to take over

You’ve given him the upper hand so now it's him who's winning

I’ve brought on the best players I have

 My M.V.P. still yet you're prone to sin

Please understand I’m your father

I’m the light you have within

I’ll be your start, I’m your end, & I’m the reason why you live

I’ve given you a gift still yet you talk as if you’ve lost your wings

Next time we speak

Don’t want it to be face to face

So slow down if not for me

At least do it for their sakes

A cough then a gag then the smoke came out my lungs

I awake in my car seat with the feeling that I’m not the only soulless

 Begotten son

10/30/2007 approximately

© Copyright 2017 Joseph Bristol. All rights reserved.


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