Detective Tex And Mr Rex

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
detective tex and his assistant are known all over the world as the worlds greatest detectives, however, tex is a drunk and his assistant has no idea what the fuck he's doing. when a strange case shows up on tex's desk he must solve the mystery and find out just who or what has been killing people before it's too late.

Submitted: June 07, 2017

A A A | A A A

Submitted: June 07, 2017



Chapter 1


“Detective Tex! Detective Tex!”, yelled Buddy as he ran into the room holding a folder in his hand, “We've got a case! Finally, a new case! And this is a good one!”. Tex lifted his head off of his computer desk and looked at his assistant before picking up his flask and taking a drink, “Oh, really? Well let's take a look shall we.”, he replied. Tex takes the folder and opens it, “Hmm let's see. Wait, what the hell is this!”, yells Tex confused. “What's what?”, replies Buddy as he proceeds to eat one of the folders on Tex’s desk. “This case! What the hell!”, yells Tex again in frustration. “I don't know what you're talking about, what case?”, Buddy replies confused while chewing on Tex’s stapler. Tex sighs and takes the stapler away from his assistant, “You told me that this was a good case, so why the hell did you hand me a menu for a restaurant?!”, yells Tex again. “what are you talking about, I didn't hand you anything, you must be drunk.”, Buddy replies. Tex slams his head down on his desk and sighs, “I think I'd know if I was drunk Buddy. If there isn't a case for me then leave me alone please.”. Buddy picks up the file he handed Tex and looks at it before laughing, “Hahaha that restaurant sucks!”. He shoves the folder down his pants and pulls a different folder out of his pants, “Hey Tex, I have a case for us!”, he yells. Tex jumps, “Seriously, you scared the shit out of me!”, Tex yells. Tex grabs the folder out of Buddy's hands, “This better not be another damn restaurant menu.”, he mutters to himself. Buddy walks over to the door to the room and places his face on the door. “Well, this is definitely interesting, it seems there has been a murder downtown.”, Tex stands up and grabs a bag off his desk, “Well Buddy, let's get going, we have a murder mystery to solve.”. Buddy opens the door and runs out into the hall, “Yes, it's murder time!”, he shouts before tripping and falling down the stairs. Tex sighs, “Why the hell did I choose him as my assistant?”, he mutters as he walks out of the room and closes the door behind him.


Chapter 2


“So, what do you think?”, a police officer whispers to Tex. “Honestly, I've never seen anything like this. In all my years as a detective, I have never seen anything this gruesome before.”, Tex replies. “I saw this in a movie once!”, Buddy shouts from behind Tex. Tex ignores him and continues examining the body, “It kind of looks like he was bit in half by something. Kind of like when someone gets attacked by a shark.”, Tex whispers to himself, “It's strange but, I swear it looks like a shark bite.”. Buddy taps Tex on the shoulder, “So, who did it?”, he asks while eating a sandwich. “I don't know, I can't just look at a body and immediately know who did it. And where the Hell did you get a sandwich?!”, Tex replies. “Oh, this? It was in the hand of the dead body, want some?”, Buddy replies. “WHAT!”, Tex yells. “Oh, and I also found this large tooth, it was in the body's arm.”, Buddy says as he pulls a large tooth out of his pocket. Tex looks at Buddy, “WOULD YOU STOP SCREWING WITH THE EVIDENCE!”, he yells. Buddy takes another bite from the sandwich, “What evidence?”, he asks. Tex sighs and takes the tooth from buddy, “Just, go home, I can handle this.”, he replies. Buddy turns around and starts walking away. Tex examines the tooth, “Strange, this doesn't appear to be a shark tooth, it's much too big.”, he whispers to himself. “Alright Tex, I have to go, let me know if you find anything interesting.”, Yells the police officer from his car. Tex slides the tooth into his pocket and walks to his car, “Well, this just got interesting.”, he whispers to himself before climbing into his car and driving away.


Chapter 3


Tex opens the door to his office and turns on the light. He sees Buddy sleeping at his desk, “Hey, Buddy? You okay?”, he asks as he places his bag on the floor. Buddy lifts his head off the desk, “Yeah, I'm fine, I just had some of your alcohol and threw up in the trash can. After that I decided to have some more of your alcohol, and then I threw up in the corner and fell asleep here.”, he replies. “Well, that would be why the room smells

so bad.”, Tex replies while plugging his nose. Buddy stands up and walks to the door, “I cleared your browser history.”. Tex looks at Buddy shocked. “Oh, and I have another case for you.”, he says as he pulls another folder out of his pants. He goes to hand the folder to Tex but falls face first onto the floor. Tex bends down and slowly pulls the folder out of Buddy's hands, “Well, now I know to hide my alcohol.”, he whispers himself as he reads the file. Tex sits down at his desk and turns on his computer. He opens his desk drawer and pulls out his flask and takes a drink, “Hmm, this tastes weird. I seriously hope he didn't throw up in my flask.”, Text whispers to himself as he takes another drink. Suddenly Tex starts to feel tired and falls forward, “I'm just, gonna sleep for a bit.”, he says before falling asleep.


Chapter 4


Tex wakes up in the middle of the night. His computer is still on but the light's in the office are off and Buddy is nowhere to be found. “What, happened, did I fall asleep?”, Tex whispers. He notices he's still holding his flask and set it down on the desk before standing up, “I better get home and get to bed.”, he says before coughing up blood and falling on the floor.

Hours later Tex wakes up in an alleyway, “Ugh, it's morning. where am I? How did I get here?”, he thinks to himself as he tries to stand up. He manages to get up and walk down the alleyway a little before tripping and falling down again, “Damn it, how much did I drink last night?”, he yells. “Tex?”, someone yells. Tex stands back up and sees Buddy standing in front of him. “FOUND YOU!!”, Buddy shouts, “We have another new case.”, he says as he once again reaches into his pants and pulls out a folder. Tex grabs the folder and looks at it, “Another murder?”, he says. “We better get going huh?”, asks Buddy. Tex nods his head and walk out of the alleyway to his car. “Um, Tex, I may not be very smart but, you shouldn't drive while drunk. Instead, let me drive while drunk!”, Buddy says. “How is that any different?”, Tex asks, “Besides, I don't think we'll need the car, according to the file, the crime scene isn't far from here, so let's just walk there.”. Buddy nods his head in agreement and runs ahead of Tex, “MURDER TIME!”. Tex starts walking down the street shaking his head in disappointment.


Chapter 5


Tex and Buddy approach the crime scene. Tex walks up to a police officer, “What do we got?”, he asks. “Well, someone died.” the officer replies. “No shit.”, Tex says to the officer. “They were torn in half, and the body smells like alcohol. We found this flask next to the body”, the officer says to Tex as he hands him the flask, “Oh, and we also have the entire murder on camera.”. YOU COULD HAVE TOLD ME THAT FIRST!”, Tex yells, “Show me the footage.”. The officer walks over to a couple of people standing near the body and comes back with them a minute later, “These people are the ones who own the restaurant here, their camera's caught the entire thing.”. The restaurant owners lead Tex into the back of their restaurant and hand Tex a security tape.


Chapter 6


Tex walks into his office and locks his door before inserting the tap into his VCR. “Alright, let's see what we got here.”, he whispers as he turns the T.V. on and presses play. He watches as a dinosaur attacks a woman while holding a flask and wearing a top hat. “WHAT THE FUCK!”, He yells, “I must be seeing things.What kind of alcohol have I been drinking?”, Tex says to himself. He continues watching as the dinosaur murders the woman and then transformers back into a human. Tex looks shocked, “Wait, I killed them? I'm the dinosaur? What's going on?”, he shouts. Suddenly Tex runs out of the room and into the security room. He sits down at the computer and plays back the footage from his office last night. He watches as his assistant Buddy puts something in his drink after drinking some of it. “Wait, Buddy did it?”, he whispers. He fast forwards to when he fainted at night. He watches as he turns into dinosaur and begins walking out of the office. “Oh my God, I did it, I killed them all, AS A DINOSAUR!!!”.


The End, For Now


© Copyright 2018 Raymond McCarnan. All rights reserved.

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