So Sorry This Had To Happen

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
taken from my book, "Must You Find Out?"

Submitted: June 15, 2017

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Submitted: June 15, 2017

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So Sorry This Had To Happen

-

To where ever my short waved brain can wander

I see no common depth in the mainstream

When waking up gets me nowhere

So with all points made

And all questions asked

I completely spin away

Up into outer space

Way too high to come back down

And since I am settling my doubts

On a high strung out leisure domain

I will wiggle my way into insanity

And wonder what's so wrong with the likes of me

While at the same time hold no key to your heart

If I aim my sausage bowl platter

Up to where it doesn't matter

I will hear the laughter

And know it did not come from you

Nor me

And can completely sink my teeth

Into all the lost feelings

Never the less, it's good to be me

The me that you let me be

But wondering where you've wandered off to

Or how sick you've become

Only short circuits my knowledge of anything real

Because I have no idea what happened to you

I barely know what's up with me

I don't even know who is more people

You or me?

And so as a cloud weighs down

Heavy on my crown

I fall off my rocker

Stuck in a ponder

And bound to move on

But don't know how

If I had the slightest bit of understanding

Maybe this would b easier

But it isn't

Because I don't

So while I sit here and laugh in my head

My ears hear the madness

As if it was really vocalized

And that's the craziest part about it

And no wonder why I don't doubt it

How a sad sly friend of mine

Would leave me hanging high and dry

As I sit and scratch my head

I itch to the death

With no clue on what to do

To finally reach you

And it's not like I have no clue

Just that I don't have any facts gathered

To form any hypothesis

On any of your whereabouts

While you have no clue

What I thought I felt for you

I can cram my thoughts into a jar

Mail it to you

If you got a P.O. box

But what would you do

With a brain in a Mason jar?

My sad lonely French fry making days

Just seem to never be coming to an end

So I roll up my sleeves

And punch the sky

Mad at The Heavens

Because you're not with me

And can never be

After all

You're married

And I'm not

You're far

And I'm near

But we're so alike it's not evn funny

I just met you too late

And that's what happens when

Two people

Were never meant to be

I can't handle another person's sickness

When I, myself, am sick

And probably sicker

But unlike a bumper sticker

The warning of this about to happen

Was not something I could see

Because you're not here with me

But instead of letting go

I'm holding onto the pain and suffering

Just so that you stay in my world

Even though you're not

Which is the cost of my dumb luck

It's not that I have a bad picker

Just that you've lost the page that I'm on

And can never hold onto me

Like I've held onto you

For oh so too long

When the sun dries my tears

Will probably be never

Since the sunlight sickens me

Put me in my disease

And shines it's hurtful rays on me

As if it had nothing better to do

I'll never think of anything poorly great

And small enough for me to grasp

All of what it would entail

So I deem myself unworthy

Of any of your love

Bound in thee ink

That my pen made up

-

06-04-'17

D. L. Cannon


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