Northern Poet

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic
There's nothing quite as infuriatingly contrived as a Northern poet.

Submitted: June 22, 2017

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Submitted: June 22, 2017



The Northern poet  who found success

Has become a bit contrived

‘I’m Northerner through and through

Lived here all me life.’


‘I feel like I’m married to the North,

My accent is my wedding ring.’

But for everyone else living here

It just isn’t a ‘thing’.


To everyone else our ‘North’

Is where we live and who we are,

But he lays it on so flippin’ thick

He just goes way too far.


He’s got all these silly notions

Of putting our region on the map

If he’d have checked it’s already there

It starts at Watford Gap.


He says ‘hey up’ and ‘eeh by eck’

When no-one talks like that

He’s living in a Hovis ad

He’s even got a flat cap.


He writes these little ditties

Of gritty Northern life

From his big house in leafy Cheshire

Where he lives with his lady wife.


He’s extremely proud of being

This great Northern Son

But there’s something he’s forgetting

He’s not the only one.

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