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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Thrillers  |  House: The Horror House

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I once again looked around me... No turning back...Everytime I crossed a door another flight of stairs would appear!

I looked around me, this time, I was in a field, the place was familiar. From here I could see my house, that wasn´t far away.
I noticed a tall and narrow building, judging by it´s conditions, it was probably deserted.
It didn´t have windows and the roof seemed like it was about to collapse, the grass surrounding it was tall and it´s green dull.
I got closer to the door, that although old, it´s appearence was noble, conveniently, the door was open.
I took the liberty to get in. The walls inside where white and the roof black.
At the end of this room I could see another door that looked similar to the one before, after thinking for a while, I  decided to open it. This time the walls where red and this "chamber" looked well taken care of, unlike the outside. 
At my right there were stairs going down, and at my left the same, excpet those were going up. 
I could hear the tic-tac of a clock that I noticed was right in front of me, despite the sound, the clock-hands weren´t  working. I though about going back because I was feeling too scared, but I ended up going down the stairs, I felt dizzy  and decided to stop walking, suddenly the screams of a child could be heard, my heart was beating fast and I had trouble 
The strident noise stopped and I finally had the courage to keep going. Once again another door was in front of me, after  that, more stairs could be found going every which way. I took my right but the tic-tac of the clock that I had long passed  by was still in my head, getting louder and louder, my head was starting to throb with pain. I got on my knees in an  attempt to rest and control my breath, my eyes were on the ground but suddenly I felt a presence and looked up. A child  
with yellow and tired eyes was looking right at me, it´s clothes were dark, I couldn´t tell if it was a boy or a girl. 
I kept trying to ask if it needed help, but he wasn´t talking and I was too scared to speak. We stayed like this for  what felt an eternity, when, out of nowhere, it opened it´s mouth and started making an inhuman noise. The inside of the child was grey and the teeth black, His tongue was dripping some sort of green liquid, before I could react, It ran away,
I tried to catch up, trying to find a way out, but there were no signs of this young human.
I stopped to take a deep breath, the sound of the clock growing even louder, I covered my ears, but that obviously did not  help. 
"You´re not going to give up are you?" 
Behind me there was a tall man, dressed in a black suit, he looked like he was in his 60s.
"Give up?" I asked confused, he smiled at me and disappeared. I must be going insane. I rubbed my eyes and found myself,  once again, going up and down stairs. I didn´t have a plan nor did I know how to go back to the field were my house was 
so close to.
I laid down, ready to give up, I could feel my lungs emptying, and before I could do anything I suddenly remebered that I  would not pass this phase. 


Submitted: September 08, 2017

© Copyright 2022 Sara Silva. All rights reserved.

Add Your Comments:



You can make better if you can find time. First of all, you need to learn formatting rules. If you look at this text in high resolution screens, you can see wrapped lines:
"were my house was
so close to".
I recommended you don't type a text using smartphones. Looks like you had used Windows notepad. If you will disable “Format” — “Wrap” (for English version) in the notepad, your text would be look better. Besides, you must using ' or for an apostrophe, not `. I see not a clear translation at least at some places. You must improve the grammar.
Good luck! Sincerely.

Sun, September 10th, 2017 5:44pm


Thank you so much for the help! I really appreciate it.

Sun, September 10th, 2017 2:17pm


I was a little confused by this, between the formatting issues and the ending. What does it mean that the narrator "would not pass this phase"? It was a spooky story, but I think it needs more buildup and detail.

Sun, September 10th, 2017 10:20pm


I´m thinking of making a bunch of short stories in this same world and then maybe I can make some sort of book. So that´s why it has a bit of a cliffanger so to speak. I will try to improve my writing and format. Thank you so much for the support.

Sun, September 10th, 2017 3:25pm

Brian P Baldwin

I think you're on the right track, but considering the subject matter you might want to add a bit more. It's hard to determine just what we are meant to be frightened of. Unless the narrator is out of shape, and then the stairs would be horrifying.
Keep going, write some more, consider expanding on this.

Best of Luck

Tue, September 12th, 2017 12:34am

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