Super Postman

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Fan Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
A postman, or mailman, is an employee of a post office or postal service, who delivers mail and parcel post to residences and businesses. Jack is a postman. He as been since he dropped from school at age 15. Back then he said to himself it was “Too Soon to Love”; he had to make money first.

Submitted: July 14, 2017

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Submitted: July 14, 2017

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A postman, or mailman, is an employee of a post office or postal service, who delivers mail and parcel post to residences and businesses. Sometimes the mail is delivered by animals. It used to be the only way to quickly transport large bundles of letters over long distances, until motorised vehicles became more widespread.

Jack is a postman. He as been since he dropped from school at age 15. Back then he said to himself it was "Too Soon to Love"; he had to make money first. He took on the "Wild Ride" of being a postman. It was indeed, since he got many speeding ticket for riding his bike at full speed. During his training he was told by his instructor that "The Postman Always Rings Twice". But Jack wanted to do its best, he always rang three times to make sure if anybody was home, they would have time to answer the door before he left. As the younger and the newest at the post office, he was sent to the worst place, "The Broken Land", to deliver mails. At night it looked like a "Back Door to Hell". To Jack, it was a "Ride in the Whirlwind", to avoid "The Shooting" from the local gang. Once they tried to shoot him in the "Head", cause he never wanted to give them any money for entering their territory. It was definitely not "A Safe Place". Later, when he was no longer the youngest and the newest at the post office, he got to deliver mails in "Chinatown". There he had "The Fortune" to meet "Tommy", who asked him.

"How Do You Know" "On a Clear Day You Can See Forever?"

"I know when "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest", answered Jack.

Now you understand why he dropped from school early. He never passed the exams, no matter how hard he studied. It's another way to say he was an idiot. He also had behavioural problems and conduct disorder. He was asked by his boss to take on "Anger Management" classes if he wanted to keep his job at the post office. He eventually improved and managed to keep his job. It's "As Good as It Gets" when you drop from school and have problems controlling your anger.

One day, the post office hired a guy called Jack Daniels. They became friends and were called "The Two Jakes". They hanged out together after work at the bar drinking whiskey. Jack Daniels became Jack's best friend. They liked to make joke "About Schmidt" their boss. Once they made jokes about him believing he was out of office.

"I'm Still Here", said Schmidt

As a punishment, "The Two Jakes" were sent back to deliver mails at "The Broken Land". But they had to work on night shift, which meant: "Back Door to Hell". But they kept making jokes "About Schmidt", and they got caught again.

"I'm Still Here", said again Schmidt

So, this time the punishment got worse. They had to work on "The St. Valentine's Day Massacre", and deliver mails to "The Witches of Eastwick" at "The Little Shop of Horrors". Schmidt attempt to "Psych-Out" "The Two Jakes" failed. Jack was an "Easy Rider", he knew how to get extra money from whores. He didn't care about "The Terror" to deliver mails to the worst people in town. He was geared on "Blood and Wine" and even "Batman" didn't dare to bother him at night.

Many times, Jack got into troubles for being so controversial.

"There's only two people in your life you should lie to... the police and your girlfriend."

But never lie to the judge and your wife. It was actually the wrong thing to say to the police when getting a speeding ticket.

"Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world."

It was the wrong thing to say to his friend Jack Daniels as he hanged out with him, and was geared on "Blood and Wine".

"I'm Irish. I think about death all the time."

It was the wrong thing to say, at the funeral of his mother who was really his grandmother. Actually, that would explain why ancient Irish invented Halloween. It's still very popular at the Samhain Festival.

"Do you think God knew what he was doing when he created woman?"

Yes, he wanted some of them to work as postwoman, or mailwoman with Jack, cause Jack Daniels is a bad influence for Jack's health. And again, that was the wrong thing to say to topless Femen protesters.

"I didn't know that my sister was really my mother until I was thirty-seven years old. But life has taught me that there have been a lot of things that I didn't know."

That explain everything about his life. When he got thirty-seven years old and learned the truth about his mother, he decided to change. He went back to school, left his job at the post office, broke his friendship with Jack Daniels, and stopped to celebrate Halloween.

"So, goodnight Jack. Now you have "Carnal Knowledge", you can cancel your "Flight to Fury" with "The Rebel Rousers". And remain with "A Few Good Men" to enjoy "The Evening Star".


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