All I deserve

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic
I called this a poem because that is the closest thing to what it is. I hope you enjoy reading it.

Submitted: July 22, 2017

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Submitted: July 22, 2017

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The cold steel blade touches my skin and I shiver with fear and anticipation.  As your face darkens with your evil intentions, I feel the blade slide over my soft naked flesh.  Gasping in pain I feel it slice into me drawing my blood and heighten my longing for all you will do to me.  The blade moves down as your lips touch my flesh tasting my blood and all my desire.  I resist the urge to struggle or fight because the pain that you inflect is well deserved.  Your twisted urges take hold and you draw from me my screams and blood until I am barely alive yet more alive than ever before.

 

The pain you inflect on my body makes me forget the pain in my soul, the pain of betrayal by friends and lovers.  The pain of losing all I care about and felt good about.  The pain of hiding my true self to all who think they know me.  I accept so many without a thought, without asking anything in return and none will do the same for me.  I stood up for those I thought were friends, but none stood up for me when I need them.  Now I lay here as you bleed me and I feel again, pain, but it is something where I felt nothing for so long.

 

I never asked for forgiveness for the things I did because all I did was to protect those I thought were friends.  I forgave their betrayals time and again since I believed I was a true friend but slowly the darkness I sank into ate my love and joy.  Now all I can feel is the pain as you cut my flesh open and let the blood spill out.

 

As the darkness closes in and I slip ever closer to that line between life and death I pray that next time I can find that thing that so many others have found, happiness.


© Copyright 2017 Gypsy Rose. All rights reserved.

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