Half-N-Half

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Flash Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic
Sometimes when you buy an animal you just never know what you're going to end up with.

Submitted: July 24, 2017

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Submitted: July 24, 2017

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In the land of Balderdash lived a farmer named Boss.

Now Boss planted and harvested the usual things, but his real passion was donkeys. Boss was one of the best Ass breeders in all Balderdash and his donkeys fetched a good price at the yearly fair.

Boss always said that his donkeys were bigger and stronger because of the food that he fed them; especially the carrots that his wife grew in her garden.

And Boss always kept a few carrots in his pocket as a treat for a well behaved Donkey; or if Boss, himself, needed a snack.

A Boss Ass could easily fetch a higher price than that of a Four-horned Steer, or a Grazer Hog. So it was no wonder that a two-toned Ass named Half-N-Half brought enough money to support Boss and his wife for a whole year; that was twice the usual action price.

 

***

 

A year had passed sense the sale of Half-N-Half, and once again Boss had taken a Ass to the fair.

Shortly after arriving at the fair, Boss was approached by the woman who had purchased Half-N-Half. 

After Hem-hawing around for some time the woman finally said what was on her mind. She looked Boss in the eye and said, "My Ass is a Dragon."

"What did you say, Mum?" asked Boss.

"I said, my Ass is a Dragon!"

Boss shyly glanced at the woman's posterior and replied, "It looks fine to me, Mum."

"No, no you Dit, come with me and I'll show you!" the woman grumbled as she led the way to a horse trailer. When she opened the rear gate of the trailer she said, "See, my Ass is a Dragon!"

Sure enough, when Boss looked inside the trailer he saw a donkey sized dragon, it was two-toned just like Half-N-Half.

After removing his big straw hat Boss scratched his head and questioned, "Are you asking me to believe that I am looking at Half-N-Half?"

The woman looked agitated as she replied, "Yes, that's what I'm saying, just look at the brand on its backside."

Boss walked over to that side of the beast and sure enough, Boss's brand was right where it was supposed to be.

Boss scratched his head again and replaced his hat on his sweaty old head.

"Can we take it out of the trailer so I can get a better look?" asked Boss.

The woman replied, "Sure, it doesn't breathe fire or anything."

As Boss led the beast out of the trailer it changed back into the donkey.

And as soon as it changed its nose went straight for Boss's carrot pocket. Boss laughed and said, "This is Half-N-Half, that's for sure!"

And with that said Boss gave his old friend a carrot.

Boss said, "I've heard tell of such transformation before, but I always thought that they were just old wife's tales.

Tell you what, I am willing to right this wrong and I will be happy to give you the prized donkey that I have brought to the action today, a straight across swap for Half-N-Half. And in addition I will pay any reasonable fee for the added costs that you have suffered. Would that please the Lady?"

"Oh No," said the woman. "I did not bring Half-N-Half here to get rid of him; on the contrary, I want to know if you can breed more.

They are a blast to ride!"

 

D. Thurmond / JEF --- 07-22-2017


© Copyright 2017 JE Falcon. All rights reserved.

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