Maybe Daddy Long Legs Have a Better Life Model than We Do

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
I had to get down on the floor to hear the daddy long legs because they are so small, and while they seem so insignificant, I learned that they have been a lot more successful than us humans and we should consider listening to them.

Submitted: August 08, 2017

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Submitted: August 08, 2017

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Yesterday, I was sitting at my computer and I saw a Daddy Long Legs walking across the floor carrying something that looked like the carcass of some bug. Now I've seen them before, and I've never bothered them as they don't ever bother me and I figure if he's carrying away a dead insect that's one I don't have to sweep up. But I said, "Hey, doing?" And surprisingly, he stopped, put down the carcass and spoke. At first, I couldn't hear him, after all, they are pretty small, at least their mouth is. So I got down, and put my head close to the floor where I could hear better.

He was actually a little short with me at first, but I suspect he was glad for the rest after carrying the carcass that was bigger than his really very small body. "What does it look like I'm doing?" he said. "I'm carrying dinner home to the family." "What exactly is that you're carrying?" I asked. "It's a millipede. It's not my favorite but the kids really like it, especially all the legs, so everyone gets one." "Did it put up much of a fight? I queried? "Hardly," he responded. "It was already dead, probably got run over by your car. There are millions of them at this time of year, so it's easy pickings. But if you want to know, we Daddy Long Legs, as you call us, don't waste our time killing anything, we prefer carrion. Saves a lot of wear and tear on us. Even a live ant can put up quite a fight."

But I had to ask "Why do you have such long legs?" He then did something I'd never seen before. He took one of his front legs and slapped himself in the forehead with it. He took a deep breath and then said "Look. Let's get one thing straight. It's none of your business why we have long legs, but I do like it that you're inquisitive enough to want to know more about us, so I'll tell you. It helps keep us high and dry and provides a better view of the ground than all the other insects. It also acts as protection. If we're being chased by a predator, the first thing they grab is one of our legs. Now, I really like every one of my legs, they help me get around, but if someone grabs a leg, they can have it. No, I can't grow a new one but I can still walk OK."

"So do you ever wish you were a human like us?" I joked. But as soon as I finished saying that I wished that I could have pulled it back into my mouth because I could see a flash of anger come over his face. But he maintained his cool, took a deep breath and asked: "So how long have you humans been on the earth?" I answered, "Well, most people say a few hundred thousand years or so, depending on what you call a human. Whatever, it is, it's been a very long time. And I think we've accomplished a lot. To which he snapped "Look, let me tell you about 'a very long time.'" We Daddy Long Legs were around over 400 million years ago, way, way before the creatures you call dinosaurs. We watched them slowly disappear and mammals start to take their place. We were here even long before the cockroaches, although we were very impressed with them even early on and always knew they would do well. We've been through giant volcanoes, comets, asteroids, hot earth, freezing earth, low on oxygen earth. We've seen countless species come and go. But we've never seen one that we had such doubts about lasting another ten thousand years, let alone 100 million, as you. If you really want to exist for any great length of time, you should start paying more attention to guys like us that have some experience in this longevity thing.

I know you humans have been very successful in a lot of ways, but I think you should be thinking about what really is successful. I realize we don't know how to build a cell phone or a space ship. Our life is really simple. We're born, we find something to eat so we can grow and then make sure there's the next generation. That may not appeal to you guys but it has worked well for us. You guys make things so complicated. The way you're going, I just can't see you being around very long. Who do you think has a better chance to being around in another hundred million years? You humans or us Daddy Long Legs?" And with that, he ambled off with his carcass.

That conversation didn't make me feel very good. I don't think I'm going to talk to any more Daddy Long Legs.


© Copyright 2017 Robert McFly. All rights reserved.

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