Naked heart

Reads: 35468  | Likes: 33  | Shelves: 9  | Comments: 26

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: True Confessions  |  House: Vintage Publishing

Non-Fiction.

A naked heart that’s now in pain,

A desperate mind going insane.

You leave me vulnerable and alone,

I see your heart is made of stone.

 

I wish that I were just like you,

Instead I’m wondering what to do.

Because you leave me feeling frail,

I’m sallow, hurt and also pale.

 

Your words, I know, will kill me soon,

This naked heart has gained a wound.

I feel defenseless to your wrath,

I’m just a victim in your path.

 

When did I lose control?

A naked heart, a naked soul.


Submitted: August 22, 2017

© Copyright 2021 jaylisbeth. All rights reserved.

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Add Your Comments:

Comments

Rehmat Tanzila

Aww so emotional and sad my dear! Loved the title of the poem and of course till the end it punches one's heart! So amazing in itself!

Tue, August 22nd, 2017 12:38pm

Author
Reply

Thank you, my love.

Tue, August 22nd, 2017 6:21am

Bert Broomberg

I liked this sonnet a lot. Well done.

Tue, August 22nd, 2017 1:11pm

Author
Reply

Thank you very much, Bert.

Tue, August 22nd, 2017 6:19am

Rehmat Tanzila

A naked heart that is now in pain
The mind will console it as crying is all in vain
Though You leave me vulnerable and alone
My lips won't complain my heart won't moan!

I wish that I were just like you
To make you realize how much it hurts 'not to be true!'
Because you leave me feeling frail
I wonder how your heart can get so pale!

Your words I know will kill me soon
Our love's perhaps not a boon
I feel defenseless to your wrath
It makes me shudder; leave your path!

How would I console?
My naked heart, my naked soul!

Tue, August 22nd, 2017 3:29pm

Author
Reply

The most beautiful response to my poem. You captured my feelings in a nutshell. Thank you, my love.

Tue, August 22nd, 2017 8:44am

hullabaloo22

Painful and relateable, jaylisbeth. It's hard when one person has more invested in a relationship, let's themselves become vulnerable when the other stays cold and cruel. An excellent, emotional poem.

Tue, August 22nd, 2017 4:20pm

Author
Reply

Thank you, Hully. It seems to be this is all I can do to more or less heal.

Tue, August 22nd, 2017 9:55am

B.B. Hatt

Beautiful work! Simple but elegant

Tue, August 22nd, 2017 4:44pm

Author
Reply

Thank you, I appreciate it, truly.

Tue, August 22nd, 2017 9:56am

Mike S.

A wonderful description of love-gone-away, J.B!

Tue, August 22nd, 2017 6:12pm

Author
Reply

Thank you, Mike.

Tue, August 22nd, 2017 11:22am

Tom Allen714

An Excellent poem...Just like your picture on the cover of this, I feel like you unzipped your heart and just pulled this poem out...Tom...

Tue, August 22nd, 2017 11:57pm

Author
Reply

That's exactly how it felt, Tom. Thank you very much for the kind comment.

Tue, August 22nd, 2017 4:59pm

Amy Furzane

Great poem and a powerful message behind it. I like the way you structured the lines, it's like reading a story and the rhyming is superb. Good work! :)

Wed, August 23rd, 2017 2:08am

Author
Reply

Thank you very much, Amy :)

Wed, August 23rd, 2017 5:11am

Spyguy

Another home run hit with style, out of the Park a quarter mile...
Every time you come to bat... You pull a rabbit from your hat!
Impressive stats I have to say, the power that your words display!
Lizbeth you are going far; Your reputation... Like a STAR!

Wed, August 30th, 2017 5:06pm

Author
Reply

Thank you, Spy. You have my made my week which isn't such a good one. You're very dear to me.

Wed, August 30th, 2017 10:09am

Aquarius

A very fine poem! It reminds me of the following;

You think that I can’t live
Without your love. You’ll see.
You think I can’t go on another day.

You think I have nothing
Without you by my side.
You’ll see, somehow, someway.

You think that I can’t
Ever laugh again. You’ll see.
You think that you’ve
Destroyed my faith in love.

You think after all you’ve done,
I’ll never find my way back home.
You’ll see, somehow, someday.

All by myself.
I don’t need anyone at all.
I know I’ll survive.
I know I’ll stay alive.

All on my own.
I don’t need anyone this time.
It will be mine.
No one can take it from me.
You’ll see.

You think that you are strong,
But you are weak. You’ll see.
It takes more strength to cry
And admit defeat.

I have truth on my side.
You only have deceit.
You’ll see, somehow, someday.

All by myself.
I don’t need anyone at all.
I know I’ll survive.
I know I’ll stay alive.

I’ll stand on my own.
I won’t need anyone this time.
It will be mine.
No one can take it from me.
You’ll see!

By Madonna

Sung by Susan Boyle
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKcHpoisjB0
(Please copy and paste the above link into your browser.)

With love - Aquarius

Sun, September 3rd, 2017 1:25pm

Author
Reply

Thank you, dearest friend. Loved the lyrics.

Mon, September 4th, 2017 1:14am

Missy1920

What a brilliant and emotional poem, it definitely made me reminisce about a past experience.

Thu, September 7th, 2017 4:07pm

Author
Reply

Thank you very much, Missy :)

Thu, September 7th, 2017 9:40am

Katherine Duvon

I am transfixed by this. It is truly amazing

Mon, September 18th, 2017 6:10pm

Author
Reply

Oh thank you very much, dear. It's a pleasure.

Mon, September 18th, 2017 12:09pm

J.H. Knight

This poem hurts, and that's the reason that I love it. It takes me and I imagine so many other readers to a place of raw emotional pain that is searing but overall must be confronted.

Thu, September 28th, 2017 5:52am

Author
Reply

Thank you very much, this poem came straight from my heart.

Thu, September 28th, 2017 5:24am

Tom Smith

A great poem of love and pain. Great piece.

Mon, October 16th, 2017 9:48pm

Author
Reply

Thank you so much :)

Mon, October 16th, 2017 2:49pm

Germanica Jones

Very good. More please if the heart has recovered.

Sun, October 22nd, 2017 7:50pm

Author
Reply

Thank you very much:)

Sun, October 22nd, 2017 2:28pm

Criss Sole

I have felt what you write about. A very strong poem and carried so much emotion. I loved it.

Wed, October 25th, 2017 7:50am

Author
Reply

Thank you so very much. I really appreciate your kind words.

Wed, October 25th, 2017 5:07am

Celtic-Scribe63

a very deep and emotional poem that shows how fragile our hearts can become when held in the hands of manipulative people.

very moving, very well written.

Thu, October 26th, 2017 6:04pm

Author
Reply

Thank you very much for such kind comment. I really appreciate it.

Thu, October 26th, 2017 11:05am

Lenny McGoo

You write from a deep place. Touches the soul.

Sun, October 29th, 2017 9:22am

Author
Reply

Thank you very much. I really appreciate it

Sun, October 29th, 2017 8:28am

Sunny Malik

I love this! It rhymes perfectly and I love how you used such beautiful words!

Sun, October 29th, 2017 10:46am

Author
Reply

Thank you, Sunny:)

Sun, October 29th, 2017 8:29am

LeParadisNoirPoetique

A naked heart is love unzipping, sucked out to go skinny dipping. Sweetest Lisbeth, this is such the emotional read. I would say out all of the people who have commented on this poem, I am the most emotionless. I have just met you, but I am truthful to you, and I don't want anything to happen to you. Reading about how personal your poetry, and how you have risen from it you have shown yourself to be one of the strongest people on Booksie, and you should never forget that. Your rhyming is beautiful, and it takes the emotional elements of your poem to another place. Your poetry is emotionally beautiful. You are stronger than hope itself, you're the beautiful book on the shelf :)

Thu, November 2nd, 2017 10:52pm

Author
Reply

I appreciate your words and I am beyond humbled that you are taking the time to read my work that comes from my heart :)

Thu, November 2nd, 2017 3:58pm

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