A naked heart that’s now in pain,
A desperate mind going insane.
You leave me vulnerable and alone,
I see your heart is made of stone.
I wish that I were just like you,
Instead I’m wondering what to do.
Because you leave me feeling frail,
I’m sallow, hurt and also pale.
Your words, I know, will kill me soon,
This naked heart has gained a wound.
I feel defenseless to your wrath,
I’m just a victim in your path.
When did I lose control?
A naked heart, a naked soul.
Submitted: August 22, 2017
© Copyright 2021 jaylisbeth. All rights reserved.
Comments
I liked this sonnet a lot. Well done.
Tue, August 22nd, 2017 1:11pmA naked heart that is now in pain
The mind will console it as crying is all in vain
Though You leave me vulnerable and alone
My lips won't complain my heart won't moan!
I wish that I were just like you
To make you realize how much it hurts 'not to be true!'
Because you leave me feeling frail
I wonder how your heart can get so pale!
Your words I know will kill me soon
Our love's perhaps not a boon
I feel defenseless to your wrath
It makes me shudder; leave your path!
How would I console?
My naked heart, my naked soul!
Painful and relateable, jaylisbeth. It's hard when one person has more invested in a relationship, let's themselves become vulnerable when the other stays cold and cruel. An excellent, emotional poem.
Tue, August 22nd, 2017 4:20pmBeautiful work! Simple but elegant
Tue, August 22nd, 2017 4:44pmA wonderful description of love-gone-away, J.B!
Tue, August 22nd, 2017 6:12pmAn Excellent poem...Just like your picture on the cover of this, I feel like you unzipped your heart and just pulled this poem out...Tom...
Tue, August 22nd, 2017 11:57pmGreat poem and a powerful message behind it. I like the way you structured the lines, it's like reading a story and the rhyming is superb. Good work! :)
Wed, August 23rd, 2017 2:08amAnother home run hit with style, out of the Park a quarter mile...
Every time you come to bat... You pull a rabbit from your hat!
Impressive stats I have to say, the power that your words display!
Lizbeth you are going far; Your reputation... Like a STAR!
A very fine poem! It reminds me of the following;
You think that I can’t live
Without your love. You’ll see.
You think I can’t go on another day.
You think I have nothing
Without you by my side.
You’ll see, somehow, someway.
You think that I can’t
Ever laugh again. You’ll see.
You think that you’ve
Destroyed my faith in love.
You think after all you’ve done,
I’ll never find my way back home.
You’ll see, somehow, someday.
All by myself.
I don’t need anyone at all.
I know I’ll survive.
I know I’ll stay alive.
All on my own.
I don’t need anyone this time.
It will be mine.
No one can take it from me.
You’ll see.
You think that you are strong,
But you are weak. You’ll see.
It takes more strength to cry
And admit defeat.
I have truth on my side.
You only have deceit.
You’ll see, somehow, someday.
All by myself.
I don’t need anyone at all.
I know I’ll survive.
I know I’ll stay alive.
I’ll stand on my own.
I won’t need anyone this time.
It will be mine.
No one can take it from me.
You’ll see!
By Madonna
Sung by Susan Boyle
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKcHpoisjB0
(Please copy and paste the above link into your browser.)
With love - Aquarius
What a brilliant and emotional poem, it definitely made me reminisce about a past experience.
Thu, September 7th, 2017 4:07pmI am transfixed by this. It is truly amazing
Mon, September 18th, 2017 6:10pmThis poem hurts, and that's the reason that I love it. It takes me and I imagine so many other readers to a place of raw emotional pain that is searing but overall must be confronted.
Thu, September 28th, 2017 5:52amA great poem of love and pain. Great piece.
Mon, October 16th, 2017 9:48pmVery good. More please if the heart has recovered.
Sun, October 22nd, 2017 7:50pmI have felt what you write about. A very strong poem and carried so much emotion. I loved it.
Wed, October 25th, 2017 7:50ama very deep and emotional poem that shows how fragile our hearts can become when held in the hands of manipulative people.
very moving, very well written.
You write from a deep place. Touches the soul.
Sun, October 29th, 2017 9:22amI love this! It rhymes perfectly and I love how you used such beautiful words!
Sun, October 29th, 2017 10:46amA naked heart is love unzipping, sucked out to go skinny dipping. Sweetest Lisbeth, this is such the emotional read. I would say out all of the people who have commented on this poem, I am the most emotionless. I have just met you, but I am truthful to you, and I don't want anything to happen to you. Reading about how personal your poetry, and how you have risen from it you have shown yourself to be one of the strongest people on Booksie, and you should never forget that. Your rhyming is beautiful, and it takes the emotional elements of your poem to another place. Your poetry is emotionally beautiful. You are stronger than hope itself, you're the beautiful book on the shelf :)
Thu, November 2nd, 2017 10:52pmFacebook Comments
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Rehmat Tanzila
Aww so emotional and sad my dear! Loved the title of the poem and of course till the end it punches one's heart! So amazing in itself!
Tue, August 22nd, 2017 12:38pmAuthor
Reply
Thank you, my love.
Tue, August 22nd, 2017 6:21am