Fading Golden

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Romance  |  House: Booksie Classic

In a world where color means love, and meeting your soulmate introduces color, Lia sees color at age four. She doesn't know what it is, nor what it means. She just knows that it was the day she met
the pretty girl with the golden gaze. Life goes on, turmoil ensues, and everything will be okay... until her vision starts to fade into black and white. (I SWEAR IT'S BETTER WRITTEN THAN THIS SUCKY

Submitted: November 27, 2017

A A A | A A A

Submitted: November 27, 2017



Fading Golden

She gazed at the raven-haired girl, whose body was painted in cuts and bruises. The doctors had described the severity of the car crash. Four broken ribs, a punctured lung, and severe brain damage. They didn’t explain the slim, precise lines scattered across her wrists and thighs, though. Lines that could only have been drawn by sharp blades. An emotionless expression replaced the usual smirk that Lia had grown to love, and her consistently styled hair was a mess, coated in blood and dirt. As the color faded slowly from Lia’s eyesight, a whisper slipped from her mouth.

“It was you.”


Lia remembered the first day she saw color. Of course she did. She had only been four, and had absolutely no idea what the bright burst of things was. Her mother had talked about seeing color before. She’d described it as the most beautiful thing in the universe. Standing in the playground, staring at the azure sky and emerald grass, you’d think that Lia would agree. But she didn’t. When a girl strolled up to her, holding a plastic Buzz Lightyear, and pointed at Lia’s Woody, there was something that clicked. The girl with black hair and mischievous eyes introduced herself as Zoe. Immediately, a thought bubbled into Lia’s mind. She’s the most beautiful thing in the universe.


They grew up as best friends, visiting each other’s houses daily, and sleeping over during the weekends. Slowly but surely, Lia fell for Zoe’s quiet aura, bright eyes, and cheeky comments. Despite the butterflies she felt each time Zoe laughed at her jokes, and the twinge of anger each time she mentioned a new boyfriend, the idea that Zoe might be her soulmate never crossed her mind. Everyone knew that soulmates were of the opposite gender. Zoe was like her platonic soulmate. The one who knew how to make her happy, and gave her advice on how to impress boys.

Of course, there were moments when Lia would catch herself gazing at Zoe’s lips, wondering how soft they’d feel, how they’d taste. She’d find herself admiring the way Zoe’s whole face would light up when she smiled. She’d watch carefully as Zoe woke in the sleeping bag beside her, her hair tousled, and a sleepy smile on her face as she yawned. The morning ray would transform her eyes into shining gold, leaving Lia awestruck. it was a well known fact that Zoe was attractive, and Lia was set on finding the boy from the playground who’d given her color.


“I’m sorry, Zoe, I just can’t do this.”

The two were sitting on Lia’s bed, reading comics in a comfortable silence. A comfortable silence that, stated in the most honest way, was slaughtered and dumped in the garbage disposal.

“Why in the world can’t you? What did I do? This is so unnecessary, Lia. Just tell me what I did wrong so we can fix this, whatever it is.”

Zoe sighed, covering her face in frustration. Her best friend had just told her that she wanted to end their relationship. Relationship as in their friendship.

“Look, it’s not you, okay?”

Zoe’s glare sliced through the air, causing Lia to wither slightly.

“I’m not your boyfriend, Lia. Don’t give me the it’s not you, it’s me bullshit.”

Lia stuttered, trying to think of a response. She’d known that Zoe would be confused and upset; Lia was ending a fourteen year long friendship. Zoe’s venomous tone was a surprise, though. Never had she seen Zoe this angry, especially not at her. Suddenly, Zoe seemed to deflate. She sighed again, this time more dejected than infuriated.

“Look, this friendship is built between the two of us. If you want to end it, there’s nothing I can do to stop you,” Zoe said quietly, but clearly. “Can you just tell me why?”

“I’m not myself anymore.”

Zoe looked confused.

“No, I didn’t phrase that right,” Lia groaned. “I just- you’re with me every second of every day. And it’s not like I mind it. I love being with you. You’re my best friend. I’m just not my own person anymore. It’s always Lia and Zoe. I don’t think I could be myself without you anymore.”

Lia glanced hesitantly at her friend, whose eyes were wide and laced with bewilderment.

“Just- remember when you were sick for a week, and couldn’t come to school? I was so miserable that I could not, for the life of me, focus on anything. By the third day, two of my teachers had already asked me whether I was okay. I couldn’t last three days without you. How the hell am I supposed to live my life like that?” Lia realized she had started screaming, and quickly lowered her voice. “We’re going to college in two weeks, Zoe. I- I want to find my soulmate again, and live a happy life with him. Is that so wrong? I just want to be normal, Zoe, and I can’t do that if I’m so attached to you. Best friends are obviously important, but I want to feel true love.”

Lia had spent the past fourteen years of her life memorizing Zoe’s facial expressions. Yet now, she was unreadable. Hurt and anger were showing, but there was something else. Betrayal, possibly? Lia couldn’t tell.


During the months after their “break up”, Lia simply felt empty. Her mind was stuck on Zoe’s expression as she’d walked out of the room, slamming the door shut. Lia didn’t know what she’d been expecting. She’d never wanted to hurt Zoe, but now it was evident that she did. Maybe she’d hoped that Zoe would agree with her. (Lia refused to think about how she’d feel if Zoe had agreed.)

As the months passed, Lia became accustomed to her new life, with new friends, a new dorm room, and new dates. She couldn’t seem to diminish the feeling of loneliness, but it eventually faded to a dull throb. Anyone who knew her would say that she had a perfect life. She was the captain of the cheerleading team, had a charming boyfriend, and obtained perfect grades. It was assumed that she and her boyfriend were soulmates; they both saw color, were stunning, and seemed to be made for each other. Gradually, Lia began to believe it herself.

She’d finally found her soulmate.

But then came the night. The night when her vision began fading, the colors dimming. It didn’t make sense. The blaring, neon party lights fell upon her sight as pastel. However, after a few drinks, Lia didn’t bother to consider that she could be losing color. It only happened to the elderly when they lost their true loves. Her soulmate was right in front of her, dancing with girls who Lia didn’t know; girls who Lia didn’t care to know.

She awoke at three in the morning, her phone going berserk with texts and phone calls. Friends whom she hadn’t spoken to in months were sending consolations.

I hope she’s okay.

 I’m so sorry.

 Sending my prayers.

Sending prayers for who? Did something happen to her mother? Her sister? She didn’t know. Yet somehow, in the deepest part of her brain, her mind screamed “Zoe”.


Watching her lay motionless, Lia knew. She knew that she’d lied to Zoe that day, when she’d said she wanted to feel true love. The truth was, Lia had been feeling it since she was a four-year old girl, when she’d first begun seeing the primary colors, along with every shade in between.

That night, she saw those colors for the last time.

She saw vivid red, the color of the blood that coated Zoe’s body. It had also been the color of her lips, as they tilted into a smirk whenever she encountered anything remotely amusing. Red was the passion Lia felt. It was the desire to be as close to Zoe as possible, and gift her all the wonders of in world.

She saw rich yellow, the color of the operating lights. It was also the color of the morning sun, as it caressed Zoe’s face, revealing her as the celestial he was. Yellow was the ray of light that radiated each time she’d smiled, as well as the joy Lia felt in response.

She saw brilliant blue, the color of the hospital gowns everyone seemed to be wearing. It was also the color of the sky when they’d first met, innocent and loving. Blue was the feeling of calmness and serenity whenever Zoe was by her side. It was the beautiful words that lured her to sleep, the soothing tone that made Lia feel at home, no matter where she was.

There were countless other colors. Vibrant orange, like the giddiness she’d felt when she surprised Zoe with countless birthday gifts. Intense green, like the jealousy she’d felt whenever Zoe gazed at another person. Radiant purple, like the mysteries of the universe, all contained inside one human being.

She realized then, that her mother was right. Color was the most beautiful thing in the universe. Every single tone mixed together formed something unbelievably alluring and ethereal. That, as Lia had always known, was Zoe.


© Copyright 2019 Lillian Rae. All rights reserved.

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