beauty and the hunger

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Literary Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic


this is about a teenage girl who longs for beauty and envies models. warning** might disturb others who suffer from anorexia, bulimia etc..

Submitted: December 05, 2017

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Submitted: December 05, 2017

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Beauty and The Hunger

By: C. Summers

 

Ever since I was younger I always dreamed of becoming a model. 

I always admired their beauty and physique.

They had beautiful bodies and beautiful facial features.

I want to be just like them. I need to be like them.

I will be worthy.

I’m sitting in my bathroom tub contemplating on whether to vomit.

Beauty is hunger. I need to be skinny to be beautiful.

Beauty is everything.

The hunger I feel for beauty will never go away. I need to be skinny. 

I get up and look into the mirror and see all of my curves and cellulite. 

Why do I look like this? 

I don’t eat as much, hell I barely eat anything in a single day.

Months go by and my figure has shrunken. I look good but I will never look as beautiful.

I’m still fat.

I long for beauty. Everyone says I'm gorgeous. But they are lying.

The lies fill my brain and I can’t take anymore lies. They haunt me. 

I am fat.

I am ugly, but I will be skinny, and beautiful.

I have the courage and I envy girls who eat everything and don’t gain.

I distract myself from the food, and the glorious smells. 

I vomit more now than I ever did. 

I like the sound of the hunger it keeps me going.

I will be skinny.

My mother says I look like a ghost. I am pale.

What kind of sick joke is that?

I look into the mirror and I am beautiful.

Nobody see’s what I see.

I step on the scale and I see improvement. But I am still fat.

I cry and cry until my eyes are sore and puffy.

Words fill my mind and I say I will be beautiful.

I am going to be a model. I long for beauty. 

Beauty is hunger.


© Copyright 2018 C. Summers. All rights reserved.

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