The Office Christmas Party!

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic


Christmas comes but once a year, its mandatory to behave like a smart ass, laugh like your on helium and generally paint that smile on your face. The Christmas Office Party, we have all been to one
Or been forced to go to one, dare we not turn up because we all know the Big Man (the Boss) is attending later on!

Submitted: December 06, 2017

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Submitted: December 06, 2017

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The Christmas Office Party.
 
Well, its that time of the year again, time to put on a happy face and grit my teeth and welcome everyone who has stabbed me in the back.
And lets not forget those who have given me extra work because they dodged the work by miraculously calling in sick on the day the work was supposed to be presented.
I’ll put all of my irritations aside just for the office Christmas party, I don’t want to be a party pooper do I?
Of course, there will be some very welcome people, attend, those are the work colleagues that have all pitched in and helped each other, the good work colleagues, the colleagues that have a pleasant and friendly personality, the colleagues that are very professional at what they do.
Then of course, we have those hangers on, those are the colleagues that are highly incompetent, highly unprofessional and have an uncanny habit of dodging and diving when there is extra over time to be done.
But ‘Its Christmas’….Or at least that’s the song coming from the Office speakers anyhow! 
So, breath in, exhale out and smile as though it was painted on my face!
 
And so,
The hand shaking and colleague cuddles seem to be in full flow, yep, let us all pretend that we would rather be here greeting each other because we only spend 9 hours a day together generally and there must be a piece of Office carpet that I haven’t seen during the thousands of foot steps that I make during the working day!
Then (big drum roll) suddenly as if by teleportation magic we get the people who refused to attend but thought better of it, when they heard the Boss was attending the Party later on.
I’ve seen enough and I am causally searching for the table that has the alcohol on it, anything will do, wine, beer, spirits…… Even a coffee because I just need that caffeine fix!
 
It’s Not Fancy Dress.
 
I just had a feeling, I just knew some one would turn up dressed as an anaemic banana, closely followed by someone dressed like an escaped mental patient. (Oh wait, that’s tomato sauce, not their real blood)!
 
Well done, its nice to see someone making an effort at these parties, maybe next year you’ll make sure you don’t get tomato sauce on the computer and photocopier!
Oh hell, we have a female vampire, looks really real, those teeth marks on her neck, then I realise that they are actual teeth marks.
I wondered what those two were doing in the stationary cupboard for half an hour, I thought they were looking for some staples for the office stapler! 
 
 
 
The Boss Man Enters.
 
Why is it that there are only two types of work colleagues, those that make a bee-line to greet and befriend the Boss and those work colleagues that try and either hide behind a filing cabinet or try and camouflage themselves with a potted palm tree (that we keep in the foyer)!
(it’s the Boss) he’ll know your there, he’s the one that pays your salary at the end of the month so stop being a Walter Mitty character and come across and say hello!
I said ‘Hey Big Man’ and got a knuckle crushing handshake along with a (right who’s for a piss up then) So he isn’t that bad!
Its once a year so let your hair down (figuratively speaking) and always remember……
(behaving like a laughing hyena & acting like a smart ass) is mandatory at the Office Christmas Party!
 
Now then,
Where is it and who had it last, I just have to present the Big Man (Boss) with an inflatable (phallic Symbol)!
 
 
Thanks For Reading.


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