The Girl with the Autumn Hair

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic

A Story I wrote as an accumulation of daily writing. The idea came to me on night, and I originally turned it into a poem and now translated it a longer but still short story. It's about a younger
man and his struggles with love.

Submitted: December 15, 2017

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Submitted: December 15, 2017



The Girl with the Autumn Hair Chapter 1:

As I walked out from the convenience store. I slapped my newly bought pack of cigarettes, packing them tight. Lit one up but It didn't stay for that long. Moments later My hand became numb at the Same rate as the rest of my body. The cigarette fell into a storm-drain never to be seen again. But what I did see a smile so sweet and this hair which screamed of autumn. I couldn't help but stare and she walked by it felt as if she was emanating some kind of aura, That that had such a pleasant feeling. She then kept on walking as if I wasn't there. “like who would ever wanna talk to a man like me?” I thought to myself. But then I felt a tap on my shoulder. It was her. The girl with the autumn hair. She asked my name. So I told her. And she told me she liked it. We kept talking and soon we found ourselves Laughing at many of my stupid jokes. As we were about to leave. My eyes open to a familiar sight. *and with an angered sigh* I see my bedroom. It had all been a dream. A dream that had felt so real, so tangible. But nevertheless a creation of my overzealous mind while my body was resting. So I start my day with a glass of water and the hope of a cigarette but I had actually ran out the previous night and was going to get some this morning. So I get to my car and start taking a drive over to this convenience store, the same from my dream. I walk out and pack-my-cigs-in like normal and then I raise my eyes. And I see someone I recognise. Someone I haven't seen in years. Chapter 2:

I take out a cigarette and light it and as I'm about to bring it to my lips. Someone bumps into me and knocks the cig out of my hand. And I watch it fall into the same sewer drain from the dream the previous night and as I'm about to turn and yell my lungs out. She's there. Just wanting my attention She had recognised who I was and called me by my name. I was completely flustered, she was beyond beautiful. Her name is Amber and even when I knew her In highschool she was still very good looking. But Those eyes, those beautiful hazel eyes, shined as bright as opals and they could make your heart, skip a beat. They sure did so for me. Just standing there motionless. I answered her back with an awkward, “hey…?” She just chuckled and then asked how I had been. It has been around 6 years since we last saw each other. I responded with the typical “I'm good.” but the actual answer is way more complicated. She replied with a common response of “that's good.” And then asked if I wanted to get coffee with her some time so that we could catch up. I replied with an “alright.” And we exchanged numbers and went our separate ways. By the time she was out of my sight, I received a text from her which included only a smiley emoji and I just gave a slight chuckle.

Chapter 3:

Not much happens during my days. Usually consisting of eating, Netflix, sleep and well of course work. My introverted self and I don't normally go out with friends too often. And when I do I usually regret it immediately. So like normal I come home from work, go take my shower. And head to the kitchen to start cooking dinner. Now cooking is a very loose term most of the time, I feel like I'm about to pass out so taking the time to make a big extravagant meal, seems very unappealing. So in this case I made something quick, poured myself a glass of tea and proceeded to my living room couch. I sit there watch my shows, eat my dinner. And then. After eating I layed down on the couch and started to doze off. This dream plane all white but void of anything. But for a second there she was, the girl with the autumn hair. It almost started to feel as if she was real, almost tangible. My heart sure felt something. It was beating so fast, I thought it was going to explode. “breathe in and out.” At the instant I calmed down and collected myself, I woke up to some faint buzzing and a beep. Coming from my phone at the corner of the coffee table. A text from her, from Amber. “are you free tomorrow?”

Chapter 4:

I went back to bed and awoke the next morning and got ready. Wearing the typical jeans, t-shirt, and my favorite pullover hoodie like normal. Amber said to meet her at Lorelei’s, it is a local place but they have good danishes. I arrived at the coffee shop and it seemed that I was the first to do So. I went in and ordered my drink. Breakfast tea, super dark and plain. I'm not that much of a coffee drinker. She then arrived in a black blouse and gray jeans, Which hugged her curves so nicely. Our eyes met and she screamed my name. As she walked up i couldn't help but blush a little, she was beautiful. It had only been around a week since we bumped into each other but it looked as if she was super excited to see me. But to be honest I was the one that was glad to see her. She ordered her drink and sat down with me. We went back and forth asking how each other had been over the past week. She said she had been doing well besides her work being a pain in the ass.and well me, just normal I guess. Normal is a very subjective word and for me. I live in pain, putting on faces, fake smiling. Just looking for excuses to keep going on. But in front of her there was no pain, only joy. There was no fake smiles, only ones that were genuine. Laughter so hard my lungs started to hurt. And it was all because of her. Sitting right in front of me. When her and I were in highschool, I had always had a crush on her but taking the time to tell her would have led to no avail. Her eyes, her laugh, and her smile all as beautiful as always, but now even more so. We both finished our drinks and conversation and went our separate ways. I felt a buzz in my pocket. It was a text from her saying, “I really enjoyed today, wanna hang out again sometime?” and of course i responded with a nice big “sure” And a smile on my face.

Chapter 5:

Not knowing how I got here, I'm in the middle of this two-way road that looks oddly familiar. The fog in front of me begins to clear and a figure begins to appear. It's her, the girl with the autumn hair. Without a single thought my legs begin to move and my feet spring my body forward and as I'm about to reach her. She vanishes. Gone, where did she go? And then my eyes open and all I see is my living room. I must have passed out on the couch. As I attempt to open my eyes, I see a light blinking from my phone. I check it and through the blinding full brightness after waking up. I see that's it's a message from Amber, asking “Do you wanna hang out today?” And of course I said yes. It was either I go out or stay home and do absolutely nothing. So I went out and had a great time, just being with her, lights a fire within me. It's so hard not to smile. But those days didn't seem to last. Our contact with each other started to become more infrequent. And then she just vanished. Gone like a leaf in a hurricane. A few months later I found out she had gotten a boyfriend and they had moved in together. I didn't notice until then but It seems that I loved her. Just being around her was like a cure for a disease that has been plaguing me for my whole life. But I didn't have that anymore. I fell back into the pit she had pulled me out of. A place i don't know if I can return from. A few months later, I woke up to the blistering sound of my alarm. I made my way over to the coffee table where I had left my phone, knocking over everything, including all the liquor bottles from the previous nights, not that i remember much of them. As I pick up the phone to shut off the alarm, There was flashing blue light. A notification, “new message.” It was from her.

Chapter 6:

I didn't know how to respond. That message sat opened and not responded to for a long time. It was just a simple “hey” but I wasn't sure if I could emotionally handle it. I sat and stared at the message for awhile, going on days. But. eventually I gave in… “what's up?” We started talking again, from the simple “how have you been?” to the “whatcha been up to?” it felt as if a relationship was being rebuilt, starting from scratch. And it was enough to put a smile back on my face. Not long after I told her what she meant to me. I told her that I love her, and even back in high school she was my crush. I was anxious because I didn't want her to disappear again. She was a dear friend, someone who I enjoyed being near and talking to. She told me that she likes me too. “how?!” was my response And she said, laughingly. “you're a fool.” We met up again, this time for dinner. we went to a nice place, but not too nice. I sat down at the table first and waited a good few minutes until she arrived. My god, she is so beautiful. I couldn't believe how good she looked. I had seen pictures she had sent me. But it didn't compare. To see her in person with my own eyes, that was special. The whole night, my face was stuck in a permanent smile, cheeks all raised and cherry-red. We had a great night; good food, good drink, and great company. We later left the restaurant, and I walked her to her car and she gave me a kiss on the cheek. As she pulled back she had the look on her face as if she was thinking about something. As I start to ask, she turns my head straight on, looks me in the eyes and then she kissed me. My feelings for her were growing from every minute of every hour. She was honestly the only thing that I could even think about. She was my everything. But then in what felt like a flash She was gone. She had disappeared again, without a single word. Here I am left so heavy-hearted. About a week later, I, thought about someone who I hadn't in a long time, the girl from my dreams. The girl with the autumn hair.

Chapter 7:

We were walking down a city street, and I could tell she was excited. I didn't know what for. Until we got there. It was a super nice restaurant. She's standing beside me almost jumping with joy. I couldn't see her eyes, as if they were blurred but I could tell that it was her. She was so beautiful. I couldn't believe that it was all a dream. It just felt too real. The chill of the wind. The feeling of her skin, she was real to me. Her smile, so vibrant and contagious, as I began to blush I couldn't help but smile back. Autumn, as I grew to call her was real to me. What felt like moments later I awaken to the sight of my bedroom ceiling. Sad that she was gone but smiling for that time we had the previous night. It was weird having all these feelings for someone you don't know, I she real somewhere? Would she really like me? Questions upon questions. Worries upon worries. But what i do know is these feelings for autumn they are real even if she wasn't. Every night as I would dream, of places I had never been or seen. But all felt so familiar. Time seemed to have lengthened when ever I was with her. And that smile was all I needed. Every Time that was the one thing I couldn't help but obsess over. The way her cheeks raised, So beautifully.

Chapter 8:

Days and then months would pass. Every Time i Would see her there, in my dreams. Her hair would be constantly changing colors; from the brightest of reds to the palest of blues. But to me, she was always the same. But at the end of the last night In what felt familiar, she was gone. She wouldn't appear anymore. I lay awake and The only thing I could I could think of was her. The memories, the feelings, of the time we had shared. But never any new ones. I remember all the many different shades of color she wore in her hair. I remember the long blondes and reds. But my favorite of all was the short and brunette. God, she was so cute, even though I knew she hated it, she was always talking about growing it back out, how unsure she was of it. But all I saw was pure beauty. I remember the sound of her voice and the way she would say certain words. I remember the first time she told me “I love you.” and I remember the smile that would follow. It started slow but Days and then even months now seem to fly by. Time almost feels irrelevant when she's not here, but still I miss her. I started to pick up my bad habits again, everything inside felt like a downward spiral. Never-ending and only worsening. I still don't think I've gotten myself out of this hole. It feels almost like I've made it home. The darkness almost comforting but leaching off of me at the same time. Time would keep moving on but me, I stayed stagnant. Like a pond with no river. Being hurt by my own thoughts and hopes. One day My heart became ice And all emotion went away. Such there was no use for. No one to show love too, no one to show care for, and no hate worth having.

Chapter 9: As I walked out of the convenience store, cigarettes and liquor in hand, I felt an overwhelming sense of deja-vu and there out of nowhere this beautiful woman appeared before me. Long, flowing hair stained a greenish-blue. It felt like She was, someone I already knew. I was almost certainly sure that is was, autumn, but when she turned around it was another. And I thought to myself, “amber…?” Seeing her brought back all of those feelings and memories. The good and the bad. It was good seeing her she looked great and she was smiling. I don't think she noticed me and I didn't say anything. I took myself on home, kicked up my feet and opened my bottle. Alcohol probably wasn't the best idea but it made me me feel good but only for the total time of 20 minutes, but by then my mind started to think on its own, stuff I'm pretty sure it knew would hurt me. As If I wasn't bad enough already. My Memories started flashing between those of Autumn and those of Amber, eventually they started to blend. And that's when I saw it, the rest of her face finally became clear and those eyes, I've known those eyes for a long time. Those eyes were as bright as opals and for the first time I knew who autumn was and why we had such a deep connection. Amber and autumn, were one and the same It's been awhile since I've felt this way. An overwhelming force pushing and pulling me. I have no more control. My only option is to ride this wave. Amber, a woman I was thinking about, subconsciously in my dreams and I didn't even notice. But there was a connection between her and I. Something I could never throw away. And now I'm just sitting here, feeling so low. I want to be able to hold her, I want to be able to touch her, i want to be everything to her. I want her to notice me. After a while I eventually passed out. No dreams as usual. But there was a voice, a female voice, one I remember fondly. And it said “you will, soon.” And then everything went black again. I eventually woke up, late as usual, and I look down to a flashing notification from my phone. I couldn't help the tears that were coming. And all it said was, “hey, wanna get some coffee?”

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