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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Mystery and Crime  |  House: Booksie Classic

Humans are hard to deal with, only God can save you


Once in a while is found the saying , Old is gold ‘ written at the back of some junk vehicles which one would mistakenly think had been within range of Bin Laden’s crime scene. And making a ride in such vehicles make you believe that all roads in Kenya, including state house road, have potholes, though with one assurance that you reach your destination anyway! But what would you do if for instance your car that you recently purchased suddenly ramped in a real pot hole that you barely saw while you were doing a 120km/hr on a smooth road and you had seen people drive on it with ease?, Not quite interesting ! Yet we all, once in a life time, have had experiences that are a distorted fate.

Now I have heard it say that the road to heaven is so rough that even the organizers of a Rhino event wouldn’t dare make it number one choice as venue for their event. No wonder the majority of humankind do chose the rather alternative smooth one and rumor has it that it is wide enough to accommodate all types of traffic like the prados ,bodaboda, tuktuk, etc.., all ridding alongside a mass of pedestrians without knocking them down . I imagine three out of every five people travelling on this road wear a tag prescribed with ‘’ Najivunia kuwa mkenya’’ , all with their heads facing forward direction while the almighty sir God mercifully begging them to change their minds about where they are heading to without knowing what is at its’ end.

Well Kanulu (not his real name) personally doesn't have anything to be proud of after an encounter with real Kenyans that have mastered the art of behaving in a manner likely to suggest that they are ‘a hidden pot hole on a smooth road. ‘?

Kanulu once had this idea of transforming his entire family into an enviable habitant of Runda or the lavish Lovington Estate. His road-map of reaching those heights required dependency on some Kenyans who posed as problem solvers and according to their adverts and sweet talking salesmen, one would believe they are the messiah sent down by God to provide predesigned success for people like Kanulu. 

Njeru (not his real name) was the salesman that Kanulu met in their ,by then ,Motherland Microfinance ltd office situated on Thika road , an elegant office indeed, furnished to a modern times looking office. All one was required to do is that you make a choice from among several unregistered vehicles parked in the backyard, and once you agree on the cost its up to you to either pay whole amount or pay deposit and promise to pay the rest in installments according to your affordability.

A Nissan QD32 would cost 1.1million if payable in installments. Kanulu agreed that he pay ksh 200,000 (US$20,000)and was to collect the vehicle in a fortnight .By then he would get the vehicle’ "Michuki" compliant’, that is, it could be fitted with 14 seats and safety belts just ready for him to put it on the road and start earning real big money. It seemed so incredibly true that he informed his family, to their amazement, that they will soon say goodbye to the miserable ghetto life that spells living from hand to mouth.

Now the krieglers of eighties never brought a sound report if in real sense there was devil worship in Kenya, but unreliable stories reveal that indeed there are mystery activities, including drinking human blood, in some Kenyan religious gatherings . And what I know is that once you have tested the stuff it becomes an irreversible covenant between you and Lucifer. You will drive a different Prado with the newest registration every month at a small fee that could be your mother, wife, son or any dear person in your life. And the end of the covenant would only be after all your relatives have mysteriously varnished and your blood used for initiation to new converts.

On one of Kanulu's' visits to the office, two weeks latter , he remained not sure whether he had entered into agreement with Lucifer or Mr.Njeru's boss (the managing director), but he at some point felt the two are one person in incarnate. The staffs at the office were at pains explaining as to why the vehicle had not yet been registered leave alone being fitted even with a single seat. Now being conned seemed eminent and with desperateness he resorted to report the matter to the famous dreaded flying squad of Kenya police. It is there that he learned that motherland microfinance ltd was one of the many syndicates of companies on the spree of soliciting money from unsuspecting genuine Kenyans trying to eke their lives.

Kanulu immediately planned an assault on the company’s devilish actions and this involved informing the public through the press .But which paper would agree writing his story? All mainstream dailies declined to write the story whenever they heard him mention the company’s name. It is a fact that Satan trembles at the mention of the name Jesus but never knew motherland microfinance ltd created great fear in newspaper’s boardroom.

So while on the street contemplating on what to do next, Kanulu came across Citizen magazine, and from their slogan proclaiming fearlessness, he walked to the editor who was more than willing to assist him enlighten the public about the hyenas hovering around just ready to eat out your hopes and resources, and came mid January 2005, citizen paper highlighted the story, fearless as they had said, but latter was realized why other papers had kept a disheartening attitude about writing the story.

The managing director of the copmpany ( Let us call him Mathenge ) made threatening calls to the editor ordering him to write another story apologizing for tarnishing his company’s name. But the fearless men instead of apologizing wrote the same story in the following edition this time including the phone conversation.

A multiple of things were now happening, the police were now hot on Mr. Mathenge’s heels, and all the dailies were now free to write anything. Kanulu's duty was now to keep a constant update of events to other complainants, some of who had paid a deposit to the tune of 800k. They all consoled each other and vowed that they should delete the word ‘Jivunia’ and insert words of their own version like ‘najijutia kuwa mkenya ‘ and had they started looking for signatures of protest they could by then be talking of 10 million on their list.

The only thing that may make the ‘wapenda kujivuna ‘ think that they are heavenly bound ,is the education level of some Kenyans who did not eat their school fees and who also did not find their homework eaten by dogs. I once saw a respected person reprimanded for talking ill of the bookmen who are by chance very few in number , and perhaps this is why they believe, as their unholy books say , the narrow road to their heaven was created for them. But the same books also say that you ‘shall know them by their language. They simply take advantage of the common man’s ignorance and make scripts only understood by them when executing the power to reap on someone’s plantation.

Well the language of lawyers who promised to ensure money back in the wallets of Kanulu and his fellow complainants remained wanting. Some had good offices along Ronald Ngala Street, but their services send you to the’ guessing chamber ‘for uncertain length of time. I am talking about coming tomorrow that never ends, and in case one proofed stubborn,you are told that in the next visit carry along ksh 7000/= being payment for summoning through press, or at times you are even told to part with 3k for the judge to sign the decree authorizing for auction of Copmpany’s (or is it Lucifer’s) properties . This becames a trend and at times could turn compelling should you show some signs of generosity. At times they could talk you into paying the money but while doing so you keep wondering how much suicidal the idea is – You see no one is ready to walk to hell even if it is claiming your rights. And this reminds me of those old days when our Sunday school teacher would induce a memory verse into our young conscientious brains. The verse goes like ‘bring all your burdens and I will give you rest’, and we were told the words are of Jesus the almighty, so we could fervently recite the verses several times a day lest we forget them- But what I know is that the people of the books have long forgotten the verses or to be precise they do not need the verses after spending a greater part of their life in institutions of highest learning to get a license of reaping where they sow not. All the same the fundamental issue is that both Lucifer and the bookmen are only talked about in hushed tones.

One day Kanulu received a call from the lawyer and just as usual he demanded quite a large sum of money which Kanulu did not readily have by then. After making several futile calls which Kanulu did not answer, the lawyer gave up, And as if divine power was in control, Kanulu decided to pay a visit to the kilimani commercial court to see exactly the progress of the case. And your guess of what he found was as good as mine; the file had lastly appeared to the judge in July 05. The only comment in the file reading ‘No ruling, who is Njoroge in this case’. Now how such a name was incorporated in the case is a mystery. Yes, just mysterious as some Kenyans who are too proud to reap other peoples’ sweat’. To them, the road of success includes stepping on your head caring less if you are hurt or not. And these are Kenyans who, when got red handed in the act, will run to court and demand that you produce hard evidence. Yet they are our fathers, elder brothers, next door neighbors, and we all must breathe the same air given to us freely by our creator. How I wish God had some inner circle mafia group and I being one of the members,to bring justice to the less fortunate humanity.

Down in Bumula, where we happen to find Bifweli Bakuli (not his real name ), is also found a civic leader who unfortunately is also a relative to Kanulu. And, according to him, were it that God allows law suit against other humans, he would have filed a case in heaven as to why Mr. Ofubo (not his real name) has any relative on planet earth. You see, this civic leader’s children (who are unfortunately Kanulu's nephews) do have bread as their breakfast ,go to the best schools in the land ,and wanajivunia kuwa their daddy’s sons when they see a fleet of vehicles flopping in their compound at sunset. And while the sons of Kanulu (who are unfortunately ofubo's nephews) barely have anything they will call supper; leave alone the unbearable living conditions. It is quit an unfair disparity thanks to the (un)honorable man that one strains to call my brother. He is not different from Mr Lucifer at motherland microfinance, given that after him and Kanulu had jointly ventured into a business, and Kanulu was out of the country for a long time, Ofubo took advantage of his absence and squirrely phased him out. A 4 million worthy brand new tractor from CMC meant they were destined to big heights as long as Mumias Sugar Company keeps writing a fat cheque for leasing it.

Kanulu had happened to travel overseas for duration of one year, and during this period is when Mr ofubo cheaply sold the tractor to a certain kisumu based Asian in exchange for a minibus, which was again sold in exchange for Nissan matatus within just a few months.

Now I know of one story by Abnuasi who claimed that a cooking pot died after he had borrowed it the second time, but being told that the business died is simply an insufficient explanation. In the normal partnership laws, both partners have equal rights of losses and profits but in this case it was one-sided, off cause the ill hear-ted ofubo being the beneficiary!!.

Yet, one is left with only one option of going to the people of the books for assistance. This is a fair way of losing than contemplating paying a visit to the dreaded man in the west of Kenya who on his university graduation day was given powers to rip people’s characters and transform them into grass eaters without clearly telling his patients whether they are now goats or sheep .And I will rather be the latter because by then I will hear the voice of Jesus Christ who removes potholes on your way to heaven.

May you have a smooth journey (flight) to your destination!

- nakhale@yahoo.com

Submitted: December 20, 2017

© Copyright 2021 Simon Nakhale. All rights reserved.

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Simon Nakhale

The good news is that the Lord God is watching! !!

Wed, December 20th, 2017 6:24am

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