Reads: 133  | Likes: 1  | Shelves: 0  | Comments: 0

More Details
Status: Finished  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic

Oh no, not more of those . . . those THINGS. Like, well, life and like that. Sorrow and laughter; humor and irony. Why the hell ARE we really here? In one fashion or another. There are a million
stories in the naked city. Yeah, but do they have to be so, well, real? Yes.

Submitted: January 13, 2018

A A A | A A A

Submitted: January 13, 2018




Life in The Raw

Short Short Stories

Nicholas Cochran





Samuel Blair was iced by Raymond Perrine using the Perrinemobile to cut down Sammy pretty much where he stood outside the Last Chance Saloon.(That is not a typo; like it was bound to happen to someone sooner or later, I guess.)

There was a beef inside the gloomy Saloon which turned into a rumble, which spilled out into the street. Christ,I wonder if they had six-guns?!

Anyway, Carmen, widow of Sam Man, is investigating a possible wrongful death action. (she says the killer has a “few lawsuits” for car accidents pending—not too sure how much faith we can place in this, but there could be some money waiting down the road from this side of the ledger if we can get judgments and lien those cases.)

Got the pre-trial in the criminal case coming up but that will probably drag out for damn near a year. Charged with murder. Even if they bust it to vehicular manslaughter, we’re in for a long wait.

Need to get the best investigator around, Johnny “Quest” Smith, crack PI, to go out and discreetly interview witnesses and potential witnesses. I’ll also get him to run a background check on the killer, looking for any prior criminal matters, domestic violence petitions, bankruptcy, etc. just see what turns up.

I told Carmen to SHUT THE MOUTH, and not discuss the potential wrongful death action with anyone. She and the witnesses apparently still live at the apt. complex. The cops have been around looking for a couple of dealers. When can we ever get a case where we have a squeaky-clean client? Is that asking too much?

Now Ronnie just called me and says that two of our potential witnesses were dragged off for possession of meth. One also had a few lines of coke in her thousand dollar compact. Oh boy!

Ronnie also says the scuttlebutt is that Sammy was taunting killer about some guy he knew who turned out to be gay. Life in the slow lane. Apparently not slow enough because killer jumped in his lowered Chevy, and bye byed Sammy.




Jeff Campbell was asleep in residence duplex. Daughter lived in adjoining unit. Fire started at 2:00 AM due to faulty wiring (dining room light fixture). This is what the daughter related to us. Jeff was life-flighted to UC Davis for severe burns to his face (nose completely melted off,) face disfigured, severe scarring. He lost both hands (painter by trade).

He remained in UCD for 2 weeks. Huge wage loss. VA has deemed him 100% disabled.

We know who the property manager and company is.

Daughter was allowed to go in and take pictures today. I called the fire department and they said they’ll have a report ready by Friday. We have an in with them (Alfonso Zamora) and may get it much sooner.

The problem we’re now facing is that Mr. Campbell is staying with his son Bobby and daughter-in-law.

The daughter-in-law, Tiffany, is a pain in the ass. For some goddamned stupid reason she doesn’t want Mr. Campbell to have representation . . . or even a spokesperson. What the hell’s with her? The good news in thatBobby and Elaine, Mr. Campbell’s daughter, DO want their father to have full representation.

Elaine says that Bobby gets home around 5:00 and that we should speak with him then.  Alice and I are going to do that. We will do a three-way with the daughter (oooooo that didn’t sound right). I mean a 3-way call with Elaine and Bobby, and hopefully the daughter-in-law will let daughter s/w brother.

Can’t imagine what the D-in-law has over the kids—over Bobby. He’s the guy out working for Christ’s sake. He should just tell her to shove it. Maybe Alice and I can tell them to grow a spine. (as long as they don’t put us on speaker-phone)

Then again, maybe they should, and I can tell the D-in-law to get lost; well,  . . maybe in harsher terms than that; then, maybe not. We don’t want t drive a wedge between Bobby and his miserable bitch of a bride. Hee hee.

This case has had a few lives already. Apparently, whoever called her, thought as the daughter, that she ran the case. Elaine got confused and almost moved along to someone else. Whew!

Alice was Johnny-on-the-spot this morning, and rescued the case from the ‘might-have-been’ bin.

Kudos to her.




Moments ago, there was a huge police chase through our parking lot here at the Ripley Office. Wow! Police all over the place. Then everyone starting shooting. The police were shooting and the suspects they were chasing started shooting back.

We all heard the commotion and looked out to see what was going on.

Jess was in his office when he heard and looked out his window. Jess was luckily spared.

The suspects drove their vehicle right into Jess’s office, into the building!

This is not an exaggeration by any means. The police shot the tires out and the guys took off on foot.

They were able to catch the guys right outside my window. Yikes! Bullets bouncing off the building and the suspects’ car. One hit the big guy driving the car in the butt. He hopped and screamed and pressed his face against my window. He really was in some pain.

Now most of the cars on my side and near Jess’s office are blocked in and being marked as a crime scene. Wow!

Apparently the guys threw a couple of guns somewhere around there. And here I guess, too.

Now a bunch of the staff cannot leave for lunch as the place is surrounded as a crime scene. Eventually, they say we can leave. Don’t know how long.

Saw Jess’ office. Trashed. With the front of the Chevy halfway in and it smashed most of Jess’s desk. There was a small fire but he rescued most of his files. We have the main computer. Thank God there was no further gunfire. Or someone here taken hostage!

I’m going to check on the rest of the staff and then lie down for awhile.

Apparently, Jess’s parrot died of fright when the windows crashed. Ellie did some weird sort of bird CPR but no good. Maybe I’ll leave early and have a couple of drinks. What a crazy day!




Got a call from Roy Bower. He has a friend who was launched off the front bumper of a Muni bus and broke his hip.

Paul Willer was waiting for the number 36 Elm bus at the corner of Jefferson. He had been at the new local weed store. Roy says he didn’t smoke any.

The Muni driver was on a break and wouldn’t open the doors and let Paul on the bus. Apparently, the driver was near the Marina and took off on a smoke break. We think. Anyway, he was away for awhile.

When the driver took off on his break, Paul sat on the front bumper to wait for him.

When the driver returned, he just got back on the bus, didn’t open the doors and just immediately took off.

Paul went flying through the air and landed on his hip, which broke.

There was a witness, Rebecca Gumm. She dragged Paul out of the way before the rear wheels could run over him.

A bunch of emergency vehicles arrived after Gumm called 911. She got the plate and number of the bus as well.

Anyway, one of the ambulances rushed Paul to St. Agnes Hospital where he underwent hip surgery. They kept him in the hospital for five days. He’s 86 but real tough. (say the nurses. I guess that could mean a couple of things.)

He tolerated the procedure very well but he almost has osteoporosis, so they want to keep him a couple of extra days just to make sure that no other hairline fractures develop.

Then they sent him to Rob Hill Healthcare Center for eight days.

Paul also had to have a catheter inserted, Ouch!

Now he’s been diagnosed with Bladder Diverticula. I need to look that one up. So now we don’t know if he’s going to stay at Rob Hill or go home. He lives with sister and brother from Florida. They were here before Paulgot injured. I think one is 80 and the sister is 79.

Carol talked to them at their home which she says is really pretty; it’s up in the hills behind Deer Park.




Edgar Jorgenson and wife were visiting the Alagosha Lawn Mortuary.

Edgar’s mother had passed away a day before and they were looking for a plot for their mother. It had been raining really bad that day. They went into the mortuary and were assisted by one of the coordinators.

Edgar’s wife, Eustacia, could remember the lady telling them both to watch their step as they walked through the building.

As they were exiting the building, Edgar slipped on the marble floor, breaking his left hip. He was transported to Valemo South where he went into surgery.

He stayed 3 days and was moved to Green Haven where he stayed for 7 days.

Edgar is having many problems due to the surgery. He is unable to swallow and has to have all his food crushed or blended in order to digest. He is now under full doctor’s care but is now also being seen by a specialist for his throat.

The mortuary was calling every other day to see how he was doing but has not called for awhile.

Josie is having our resident medical investigator, Doctor Roswell, look into the swallowing problems.

I was going to suggest this as a slip and fall but given the warning and all, it might be a stretch.

Just got a call form Dr. Roswell. Apparently there is a real problem with the anesthesiology report. Some of it is redacted. Hunh?? Never heard that before.

Anyway, he also says he has some suspicion about the surgery. Thinks there may be some nerves involved. He’s staying in touch. I’ll update this as we go along. Any ideas?


End of Volume Two


© Copyright 2018 Nicholas Cochran. All rights reserved.

Add Your Comments: