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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Young Adult  |  House: Booksie Classic

in which the reader finds that both blue and kace seek to change their fates.

Chapter 9 (v.1) - moon

Submitted: January 14, 2018

Reads: 68

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Submitted: January 14, 2018



kace turned, utterly afraid, to see his younger self in front of him, staring him down. his past self's gaze didn't waver despite the black eye and bleeding on his cheek. kace wasn't sure if his younger self could actually see him, but he was scared as hell. he looked away desperately, wanting to run--his feet were frozen on the ground. no words came out of his mouth, only tears from his eyes. he wanted to apologize. and yet, he couldn't even forgive himself. not for what he'd done. not for what he'd put himself through. shaken, kace's younger self stepped away and lifted his fingers to touch his pale cheek. he looked at blood stained fingers and flinched with realization. he was eight. eight. and his life was already being torn apart. kace's throat closed with sadness. where was the mercy? why did he not deserve a second chance? why was love so cruel?

"i'm sorry." kace was shocked to hear words--his own words.

his younger self turned around to face him.

"i'm so, so sorry."

his younger self reached out a cold hand, but it slipped right through kace.

"i wish i could fix things for you, kid." whispered kace to his past self, eyes brimmed with tears. "i wish i could," he repeated, voice now breaking. "all i wanted for for you...for us to be happy. and i screwed it up and that's my fault but you have to listen to me. i don't want you to get hurt. but you will. i can't do a single thing about it."

eight-year-old kace trembled, either trying to grasp the fact he was hearing voices, or the fact he was seeing colors as usual. it depended, considering kace couldn't tell if he could hear him or not, nor could he remember. if only this was not as long ago--perhaps then, he could pinpoint exactly if he had indeed been able to hear his own words. it was a shame he couldn't.

"i'm the worst," he spoke through clenched teeth, no longer at all afraid to admit to his mistakes. "i doomed us both, didn't i?"

he wanted an answer.

there was none.


blue could hear her blood roaring through her veins. she sided up to a brick wall in the street, peeking out to make sure nobody was following her. or nobody was suspicious. tiptoeing forward, she dragged herself towards a specific doorway. it was the local psychic. usually, blue didn't trust these types, but she had no other choice.

tossing her backpack to the floor (at least the carpet was clean) and slumping into a chair, she looked up, squinting at the woman in front of her. the woman had clear, shining grey eyes and thin, dark red lips curled into an almost smirk, along with wispy, thin grey hair that was wildly perking in every possible direction. blue had no time to judge. she reached into her pocket and dumped a huge stack of cards onto the table between them, brown hair caught in the clasp of her coat. her aquamarine eyes made contact with tired eyes of gloom.

"please read them. i've done this before, it's all set up already. i just need someone who knows how to explain what they mean," she said bluntly, nodding at the cards splayed out on the table and eyeing the sign in the corner stating the prices for readings.

the woman adjusted her glasses, peering down at the cards to perhaps make a judgement. she cringed every so often, making blue worried too, as her eyebrows creased with concern.

"this one," said the psychic, finger thoughtfully placed on a card depicting a lion and a snake, "means you feel lost. confused. maybe...just looking for the perfect direction." she didn't ask for confirmation. instead, she continued anxiously, "and this one...means your future is doubtful. i cannot seem to tell when it ends, but your behaviors will be the judge of that. despite how and when you die, this card tells me that your future will not exactly be over. there will be more. although perhaps not what you would like. i see a dog and a cloud. meaning you'll most likely have some unfinished business to do in the afterlife...and a rose covered in thorns, upside down--"

"is there any advice on how to change what happens after i die? anything in the cards?" blue asked suddenly, desperately, frantically. her eyes wildly scanned the different images, only to see the psychic shake her head pitifully.

"i'm afraid not, but there's plenty to say about what happens before you die, if you'd like to hear it."

"i'm good, i don't need the rest." snapped blue, now aggravated.

"but this rose means that you--"

"i don't care!" blue cried, shoving a wad of bills at the woman. "i have to go, anyways."

the psychic looked worried, but didn't complain. after all, she had her payment.

blue's expression was steel in the night. she had visited so many psychics, only to always receive the same result. and even if they couldn't comprehend it, she knew she was going to be a demon. why? what could she do in the future that was so terrible she deserved such a fate? the worst part was, not a single one could offer her a way of redemption. it was literally as though she had no say in her own future. the thought of it pissed her off. she knew what having a demon was like, and god, no one should ever have to suffer the way she did. she had barely defeated him. and now she would have to hurt someone the same way? for what?

the moon sprinkled faint light on her freckles and splattered her eyes in sparkles. blue missed the feeling of being free. she missed the feeling of not being chained down to the inevitable. she missed being small, almost nonexistent.

she was fourteen now, and slowly, as she grew older, being nonexistent became more and more difficult, until she knew she had to do something about her life whether she liked it or not.

right now, that something was to fix it.

that didn't mean that in the future, it couldn't mean something else. she had backup plans. millions. she wasn't about to go down. she wasn't about to accept the fact that yeah, she was going to be a demon. she wouldn't settle, because she knew she couldn't live her life knowing that. she'd rather use it up trying to find a solution, actually. she was ambitious and determined. blue knew what a wasted life looked like, felt like. she'd seen it and known it. that was the worst way to end. and she knew that was how demons did. people had called her insane, because it was impossible for demons to actually be real, right? they were figures of imagination, pieces of long forgotten fables, or mentioned once or twice in the bible, at most, and nothing more. but they were wrong--they had to be.

because she wasn't going to let herself die until she knew the truth.



© Copyright 2019 Paris Tremaine. All rights reserved.


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