How I Regained My Self Confidence

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Memoir  |  House: Booksie Classic


How I Regained My Self Confidence



By M L Tillman



Successful people are usually outgoing and confidant. They are not afraid to be themselves. But how do you regain confidence that has been stripped away from you or maybe you never had in the first
place? It took me a very long time to figure this out. This is what turned my life around and will also work for you.



I worked in a call center for 13 years. Seeing the same people everyday. Passing them in the halls and briefly running into them in the break room. I usually kept to myself and did my job. I didn't
care to invest time in a conversation. When you lack self esteem, you tend to shy away from social situations. Always afraid of what you might say or how you look. Thinking to yourself, your not as
smart or good as everyone else. They don't care what you have to say. I am a very polite person but I lacked the self esteem and confidence I needed to be happy and thrive. I would always say hello
and ask them how they were doing but that was it. Nothing more than a quick hello with an empty how are you. I am not good with names so I would not even try to learn their name for fear of getting
it wrong. Things started to turn around for me when I made one simple change.



Before I tell you what I did, let me make you aware of one important fact I have discovered. There are more people than you may realize that do not have close friends. I always thought most people
had tons of friends. They were happy and everything was good in their lives. I was wrong. You would be surprised at just how many people, when they go home, do not have family or close friends to
talk with. This is true for a lot of older people. Younger people may also feel isolated in their family or be in a bad relationship with no one they can really talk with. We all want the same
thing in life. To be loved, appreciated and to feel secure.



So this is what I did.



I started to call them by their name. It is hard for someone with a bad memory to remember names but if you make an effort eventually, one by one, you will be able to recall their names. This may
take a while but you can do it. Learn one person's name first. Then when you have memorized one person's name, add another. Then another. Before you know it you will know quite a few names. Don't
just do this at work but with everyone you meet wherever you are. Now when you pass coworkers or other people you meet regularly, say hello to them using their name and add a few meaningful remarks
to the casual conversation. Nothing extravagant, just some context that is a little more personal than, "how's the weather". If you know they are preparing for a trip, ask them where they are
going. If they are preparing for an event, ask them how that is going. If they have been sick, ask them if they are feeling better. Just try to add a few personal remarks that have meaning to your
casual conversation. And be a good listener. People usually like to talk about their life. Try to pay close attention to what they say so you can bring it up the next time you meet them. This shows
you care and are really listening to them.



Now the next thing I did was this. Send them an occasional text or call them. Don't overdo this. You can sense if they appreciate you contacting them by their response. If you feel they don't want
you to contact them back off, but you may be surprised to find out they need someone to talk with. They may be lonely and need a friend.



Having friends is what builds your confidence and self esteem. The more people you feel you have as friends the more confidant you will feel. Success is not really how much you own or how much
money you make, but how many true friends you have. Once you create a friendship, be there for them if they need you and they will be there for you when you need them. This is what makes happiness
and builds your confidence and self esteem. You can conquer the world when you have support.



Now with that being said, know that God loves you. God is always there for you when people and loved ones may not be. He will never leave you or forsake you if you put your faith in Him. God knows
your heart. God's children go through hard times just like people who do not believe in Him, but our trials and hardships make us who we are today. Hardships build character. God will not force you
to follow Him. He allows us to do things our way and make mistakes. When we realize our way does not work we usually turn to Him. How much easier it would be if we just listened to Him in the first
place. Children need discipline to grow into mature and respectable adults. The difference between someone who has put their faith in Christ and someone who has not, is that when the believer faces
hard times here on earth they know it is for a reason and God will never allow more to happen to us than we can handle. Acknowledge Christ as your Lord and Saviour and repent of your sins. Now that
you are His child, you will inherit His kingdom when you die. The believer knows when this brief journey through life on earth is over, we will forever be with the Lord in heaven for all eternity.
Now if that doesn't give you strength, nothing will!

Submitted: January 15, 2018

A A A | A A A

Submitted: January 15, 2018

A A A

A A A


 

How I Regained My Self Confidence

By M L Tillman

 

 

Successful people are usually outgoing and confidant. They are not affraid to be themselves. But how do you regain confidence that has been stripped away from you or maybe you never pocessed.  It took me a very long time to figure this out. This is what turned my life around and will also work for you.

I worked in a call center for 13 years. Seeing the same people everyday. Passing them in the halls and briefly running into them in the break room.  I usually kept to myself and did my job. I didn't care to invest time in a conversation. When you lack self esteme, you tend to shy away from social sititutions.  Always affraid of what you might say or how you look. Thinking to yourself your not as smart or good as everyone else. I am a very polite person but I lacked the self esteme and confinance I needed to be happy and thrive.I would always say hello and ask them how they were doing but that was it.  Nothing more than a quick hello with an empty how are you. I am not good with names so I would not mention their name for fear of getting it wrong. Things started to turn around for me when I made one simple change.

Before I tell you what I did, first let me make you aware of one important fact. There are more people than you may realize that do not have close friends. I always thought most people had tons of friends. They were happy and everything was good in their lives. I was wrong. You would be suprised at just how many people, when they go home, do not have family or close frineds to talk with. This is ture for most older people. Younger people may also feel isolated in their family or be in a bad relationship with noone they can really talk with. We alll want the same thing in life. To be loved, appericated and to feel secure. 

So this is what I did. 

I started to call them by their name.  It is hard for someone with a bad memory to remember names but if you make an effort eventually, one by one, you will be able to recall their names. This may take a while but you can do it. Learn one person's name first. Then when you have memorized one person's name, add another. Then another. Before you know it you will know quite a few names.  Don't just do this at work but with everyone you meet wherever you are. Now when you pass coworkers or other people you meet regularly, say hello to them using their name and add a few meaningfull remarks to the casual conversation.  Nothing extravagant, just some context that is a little more personal than, "how's the weather".  If you know they are preparing for a trip, ask them where they are going.  If they are preparing for an event, ask them how that is going. If they have been sick, ask them if they are feeling better. Just try to add a few personal remarks that have meaning to your casual conversation. And be a good listener. People usually like to talk about their life. Try to pay close attention to what they say so you can bring it up the next time you meet them. This shows you care and are really listening to them.

Now the next thing I did was this.  Send them an occasional text or call them.  Don't overdo this.  You can sense if they appericate you contacting them by their response. If you feel they don't want you to contact them back off, but you may be surprised to find out they need someone to talk with.  They may be lonely and need a friend. 

Having friends is what builds your confidance and self esteme. The more people you feel you have as friends the more confidant you will feel. Success is not really how much you own or how much money you make, but how many true friends you have. Once you create a friendship, be there for them if they need you and they will be there for you when you need them. This is what makes happiness and builds your confidance and self esteme.  You can conquer the world when you have support.

Now with that being said, know that God loves you. God is always there for you when people and loved ones may not be. He will never leave you or forsake you if you acknowledge Him and repent of your sins. God knows your heart. God's children go through hard times just like people who do not believe in Him, but our trials and hardships make us who we are today. Hardships build charcter. Children need discpline to grow into respectable adults. The differance between someone who has put their faith in Christ and someone who has not, is that when they face hard times here on earth they know it is for a reason and God will never allow more to happen to us than we can handle. The believer knows when this brief journey through life on earht is over, we will forever be with the Lord in heaven for all eternity.  Now if that doesn't give you strength, nothing will!

 

 


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