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johngumbs

Get it all out, Yeah! In the end you'll feel good. Yoyr rhyming is getting better better. I like the way you arrange the words.

Adam L.

Very nostalgic, Lis. I was blindsided with the last three lines. Nicely done and great rhymes.

LeParadisNoirPoetique

As bittersweet as two stars being together, then their light burns out to leave the distance of separation. I believe the tears you will cry are the memories of this; that is why you cannot stop thinking about it. The memories burn because you felt a complete person, and life right now is so distant from this. You may miss this person, but you don't miss us because of the destination departure. Getting very personal with your memories Lisbeth, and when you write about them, how ever painful they were, you seem to write your best poetry from them. I probably want you to be honestly ok more than anyone, so any happy memories you have, think of them instead. It is difficult knowing what you are feeling right now, but I believe your strength will guide you to the correct place. What you are feeling is real life, and faith will not help you because it does not exist, all you need is yourself.

It's another deep poem, and the real life you have wrote about describes that it is not easy, and only you feel what you are going through. The poem is beautiful, and your rhyming is so hard hitting. For what you are feeling, I find it a remarkable achievement that you are able to write such quality like this. It all goes back to your strength, and how real life will not defeat you.

Mike S.

Beautiful and sad, J. B!

hullabaloo22

Some feelings never die, jaylisbeth. Sad and emotional.

Sue Harris

A great poem JB... memories of an elicit love. But that's all they are... an episode in life, but not real life. Would it have remained so exciting had it not been clandestine? A heartfelt poem, written with raw emotion and truth.

Jeff Bezaire

Those first four lines carry the greatest weight. They're the most positive and the most emotional of the piece. "I miss you; I don't miss us" is the tidal wave, I think. So much said, so much revealed with that one line: clarity, perspective, honesty, admission, a wave of release it feels like.
This is an incredible piece, Lisbeth! It's an extremely courageous thing you've done, to reveal and release this secret, this weight that's lived inside you for so long. They say: "the truth shall set you free". I hope this was liberating for you. Hopefully, you found some cathartic release in writing this. We can't move on until we let go of the past. The love may never die, but hopefully it does not tie you down.
Your words carry plenty of tenderness. Although this poem is ultimately about the pain of being denied this love, there's so much beauty in your words.
The poem is incredible and your bravery is commendable.

Tom Allen714

Well done Jaylisbeth, to love a taken heart...Tom...

Rehmat Tanzila

That's so beautiful dearest !! Excellent scheme of writing

Criss Sole

I loved it. I could feel the heartache as I read this.

Spyguy

I can’t say I condone infidelity, part of the reason is evident in many of these poignant & heart-felt poems you pen, but I understand & admire the trueness of your heart!

Spyguy

I hope you can cultivate the caring & love that Jeff has for you my Princess friend! I see here, as in every other example of his comments to you, very sage & reliable advice, council, & wisdom!

Amy Furzane

As much as we love someone, it doesn't mean we have to be with them. Such painful dreams thinking you will never be with the one you love. Nicely written I like! :)