All Safe Together

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Other  |  House: Booksie Classic


 

 

  All Safe Together

In life there may be challenges we face that are beyond our control.  Sometimes we may not get along with our family or friends. Either of these things (and more), can be sources of fear.  So what can we do to make us feel ‘safe’?  The first thing is taking responsibility for what we can apart from what we can’t control.  One way to do this is managing time, believe it or not.

  Planning your day takes away some uncertainties.  If you know what you have to do, or even write it down, you will be focused on your list and less likely to be interrupted by what you can’t control that may take you away from what you want to accomplish.  So have an idea of each day’s agenda to stay focused.  And the things on your list that require energy or action during business hours or when you have the most energy should be done first.  Having peace of mind that you have accomplished most of the hard tasks at the beginning of your day or when you have the most energy gives you confidence and makes you less afraid of anything else that may come up, because you’ve gotten most of the things done that you felt you had to do.

  And that family thing.  Well, most of us can’t afford to live on our own yet.  That means we have to survive somehow with people we don’t get along with all of the time.  So getting through our day involves other people with their own personalities and their energy, too.  Sometimes that energy isn’t always good and we want to keep a ‘healthy distance’ so that we don’t feel so much negative energy.  This can be really tough if we need something from someone in a ‘bad mood’, and no time is a good time.  By being with people or family members we know well, we learn how to have conversations that will have the best outcome that we want, even though others may not be in a good place to discuss things.  This is also a way of staying safe so that we have energy for things that we need later.  If we let others get to us, it takes our energy and time to do what we need to do. So what is ‘safe’?  Literally, to me, it’s like being familiar with surroundings (and exits!).  Again, doing things in an organized form also helps.Like that’s what fire drills are for, right?  The same goes for us.  Some call it a safety plan.  It’s different for everybody.  Having a plan is always better than no plan, and one for school and one for home is sometimes necessary, as well as one for outside, too.  Like never going somewhere you’ve never been before alone.  There is a safety element in making new friends.  After all, we go places with friends, not strangers.  The best kinds of friends to have are those who have a positive attitude and purpose.  Why is that?  Because positive people don’t try to hold you back, for one thing, and are usually there for you when you need them.  That’s why it’s good to have more than one such friend so in case one isn’t available, another will be. 

  And what is having a purpose?  It all goes back to friends being able to understand you have goals and things you need to do on a daily basis and ongoing.  Safety is having an environment and friends that help you to get where you want to go in as safe a manner as possible.  Anyone who tries to hold you back in any way isn’t safe for you.  If there are people in your life or at school that you feel don’t care for you that you can’t avoid, they aren’t looking out for your safety either.  Some may even put you in harm’s way either directly or by not helping you get or stay safe.  It’s important to know who these people are, and if you can’t avoid them, have a safety plan on how to deal with being around them, until you don’t have to be around them anymore.  Bullies are just one example of this, though some grownups can be pretty scary, too.

In a lot of ways, having goals, dreams, and a plan helps you to both make plans, build your confidence, and find positive people to help you get there.  It’s a lot about practice and sticking to it.

 When we seek professional help (which really is about our general safety: taking care of ourselves), often times we are given the option of prescription medication, without understanding what its purpose is.  Those ‘meds’ may cause a different problem and more meds are prescribed with side effects that may clash.The intention is to help us, and we don’t know until we try what works and what doesn’t.

You have the right to make your own choices about experimenting with new things, especially anything going into your body. Think about what you do each day and the purpose and end result or accomplishment with each task at hand.  Listen to your heart and do research before pursuing anything.

  If you have any conflict with your family or friends, just know that the moment won’t last forever and with time, faith, and patience, life will change.Even though the people closest to you don’t seem to support you, eventually the tension and silence will be broken.Eventually.  Always remember that working together with people you love or trust makes it easier to complete a task or achieve a goal.

  You can always ask for help from a teacher or look for a life coach for support and trust, too.  This is called confidentiality which by law cannot be broken.  This doesn’t mean the law is always observed; at least we know what it is.  If the person you sought advice from is steering you in the wrong direction, or putting you down, don’t be afraid to let them go.  You have to let go of the negative to make room for the positive.This has happened to me many times in my life, where I’ve had bad teachers and doctors who have no effect or care in helping me achieve positive goals.  So they’re not in my life anymore.

Never think of yourself as out of place.  A famous person (Eleanor Roosevelt) said do something that scares you every day.  So long as it’s something you can stay safe doing.  Everyone has a talent of their own and always be proud of what you do each day, and when you successfully try new things, too.  Approach every task with a positive thought.Thought become things, another famous and wealthy person said (Mike Dooley).  If you have physical limits, make the best of the abilities you have. 

 Exercise is the best way to handle any stress you may experience.  Always remember that it is important to have the right friends, or good family support.  Not all family members can give positive advice or support, that's why it is important to associate with someone who has a positive image or goal.  This brings confidence to achieve anything you want.  It bears repeating, and I did.

To supplement my weaknesses, I use writing to express my emotions.  I've learned to write my ideas or troubles on paper to help take the stress away from a bad day.  When it’s out of me and on paper, I feel better and stronger, therefore safer. 

Sometimes I have a good day in which I'll write about it so that I end the day in good spirit to help me get a good night's sleep, which is very important.  Writing is a skill that is used to organize things and to develop new skills or correct mistakes.  Writing about the events that were troublesome can be easier for someone you trust to help you with your situation.  You don't have to share everything, unless you feel comfortable.

When something is bothering me, pen, paper, and rest relieves the stress.Being well rested also helps us stay safe.  When you write, don't worry about grammar or an incomplete thought, begin with what comes to mind is a start.  Something is always better than nothing, and you can build on it later when you’re stronger or feel better.

Life always comes with stressful events that we all go through.  Sometimes when parents argue this may cause a bad relationship with one or both parents.  Sometimes this isn’t safe either.  This is what I was talking about earlier.  Keeping relationships positive and strong in the family can help keep more than one of us safe, as with friendships.

  A good way to handle a problem is by having a recreational outlet, too.  Attending community events is a stepping stone for youth to meet new people, and form stronger friendships.  This is also a way to spend less time at home in a positive way rather than running away for a length of time.  Running away usually isn’t safe or productive.  Keep trying, and always know that there is a positive outcome of anything you do with heart and focus.  You may not succeed on the first attempt, so dust yourself off and keep trying.

  I couldn’t finish this without talking about my mom, which is all about feeling safe and feeling loved.  When you know someone cares about you and your best interests, you automatically feel safe, even when you’re alone.  When I’m with my mom I feel safe because I can always talk to her.  She understands things that I tell her based on troubles that I have and experience.  I can trust her because she understands my phrase words and keeps up with short sentences.  She can finish my sentences, just like a good friend can.  I’ll always love my mom because she has done so much for me my entire life.  She’s funny and we can talk about many different things.  A person you can trust keeps personal information to themselves.  Your personal information is a lot about safety too.

  So I hope I’ve been able to illustrate about safety in love, in life, and how we can help stay safe on our own, with friends, and with family, by taking action, and spending more time with the right people.  I hope I also made it easier to understand safety that’s not just about not getting hurt.  There’s a lot to safety, and the more we know, the safer we can all be, together.


Submitted: February 13, 2018

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