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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Thrillers  |  House: Booksie Classic

wrote this just for fun, hope you guys like it xo

Submitted: March 11, 2018

A A A | A A A

Submitted: March 11, 2018



I’m in love with her, and no one knows. I admire her from afar. She doesn’t bother to notice me. I knew her since the second grade and she never bothered to talk to me.

Well, she talked to me this one time, but it was to ask if I had a lighter for her cigarette. She stopped smoking though. She got over her anxiety by junior year. I know this because I overheard her shit friends talking about her. I swear to God, they will pay for speaking bad of her. Alaska is perfect the way she is.

We’re seniors now. I have to make a move before we graduate. I need to make a move. I fell in love with Alaska the moment I first laid eyes on her in the second grade. She was tying her neon pink light up Sketchers. Her golden locks tied up in a ponytail; and the way she giggled. Wow. She was the one. She is the one. 

I don’t have any friends. If Mr. Melendez counts as a friend, then I guess I have one friend. Mr. Melendez is cool. He can be an ass sometimes but he’s my only friend. I kind of feel like he pretends to like me. I stay in his class for lunch so he can keep me company. I mean he gives me weird looks when he sees me jot down Alaska’s name on the corner of my desk. I quickly erase it when he notices. 

I wait for Alaska to come out of Mr. Melendez class last period. I only know her class because I “accidentally” saw it on Melendez’s roster when he left the classroom for a few minutes this one time. I notice her blonde hair and that white headband she always wears in the chaotic ball of kids surrounding the front doors. I dig my fingers into my palms. God I’m so anxious. Fuck. Be cool Matthew. Be cool.

“Hey, are you okay?” I heard Alaska’s soft voice ringing in my ear. What the hell. I mumbled something out of my breath not making any sense. 
“What happened?” I softly said almost whispering.
“You fell down the stairs and hit your head pretty hard.” What? I look around and notice I’m laying on the floor outside the front doors of the school. Wow. I said be cool Matthew. I’ll usually dig my nails into my wrist whenever I did something stupid, but I can’t have Alaska thinking I’m some sort of psycho. 

This is my chance to ask her on a date. 
“Uh so Alaska? You don’t know me do you?” I stuttered.
“Of course I do. I’ll always remember the guy who let me borrow a lighter.” She smiled. Wow. That smile. It looks exactly like it does in the picture I keep of her in my wallet. 
I chuckled. “So you wouldn’t mind if this guy asked you on a date then huh?” 
Her smile widened. “I wouldn’t mind at all. Pick me up at seven.” She said while she turned around and walked towards the bus loop. She takes bus #56. I always follow her after school to the bus loop and watch as she gets into her bus. I need to make sure she goes home safely.
“Matthew. Matthew. Matthew, wake up.” 
“Matthew it’s time to wake up, your mother came to visit you today.”
I groaned.  “What does she want? I was having a good sleep. It better be good.”
“She’s your mother. She wants to have breakfast with you this morning.” 
“Agnes, you know how I feel about my mother. She’s the reason I’m in here.” 
The door opened. “Hey sweetie. I brought doughnuts, your favorite. Sprinkled chocolate.” She smiled with that annoying fake smile she always does. I hate her. 
“I’m planning to have breakfast with Alaska, mother.” 
Agnes and my mother exchanged looks while my mom put down the box of doughnuts and walked towards me sitting next to me in the rough uncomfortable dull bed I’ve been sleeping in for the past four years. “Honey. We’ve talked about this.” 
“About what? I need to get ready for my breakfast date. You’re wasting my time.” She’s really starting to piss me off now.
“Alaska is dead. She’s been dead for over four years now. Let her go” 
“What? Stop bullshitting me!” I yelled. 
“Matthew calm down.” 
“Agnes, shut up.” I shoved her attempt at comforting me.
“Matthew, honey, we’ve been through this. She’s dead.” My mother said with sympathetic eyes. Her next words almost made me choke.

“You murdered her.”


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