The Office Suggestion Box.

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Short Story by: Left On The Shelf

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Status: In Progress | Genre: Humor | House: Booksie Classic

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Great ideas are often spoilt with sarcastic comments within an Office environment. Its never been a great idea to make suggestions anonymous.

Submitted: March 22, 2018

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Submitted: March 22, 2018

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There’s always a use for an empty A4 size cardboard box and that use doesn’t rule out having a letter sized hole cut in the top of the lid!

So welcome to the new idea of having a suggestion box in the Office, a clever idea ‘although not very well thought out’ because as anyone knows, asking office colleagues for suggestions is a bumpy road to sarcasm & ironic humour.

And worst of all, that all suggestions be anonymous so I can imagine, there will be those team colleagues whom are already loading their cannons of stupidity and down-right idiotic suggestive moronic comments, all in the hope of getting a cheap and shallow laugh from those who have a glimmer of intellect.

Of course,

I’m not a humourless dull person but I can guarantee that there will be a surjection and slightest hint of eastern European flavour in one or two of the suggestive comments… Especially now that a company in France has been given the contract to do the new Blue British Passports!

There are times when I really do wonder about the importance of the UK Government in the wider world because I was under the impression that the United Kingdom was leaving the European Union, I didn’t realise that meant giving those companies in the EU overall security clearance of those of us lucky enough to live in the UK.

‘There’s irony there, somewhere’.

Anyhow, I’m now starring at the blank suggestion note, what do I think would benefit ’firstly me, then the wider team colleagues’ within the Office.

My first thought was to request a butt plug for the flatulence king in the corner of the Office but I decided to be slightly more professional than one or two of my colleagues!

Anyway,

I write down ’anonymously’…. The use of E-cigarettes and vaping in general, after all, it’s not tobacco smoke and there’s no residue left like when smoking real cigarettes and as far as I’m aware, there is no law in the UK yet banning people from using e-cigarettes in doors. Although that depends on what the Boss decides.

………………………………...........

Fast forward a few days and the results are in already…

And were going with the ‘new Coffee Machine’ because its use will be more beneficial to everyone and those of us whom use e-cigs will have to stand outside looking like were expelled exiles with a disease, again!

Coffee Machine’.

As normal when a piece of new equipment arrives, everyone makes a bee-line and zips over to have a look at it.

And as normal, our glorious boss, has bought something that looks like it used to be a stage prop from the Star Trek series.

‘Beam me up Scotty’ are the words reverberating around the Office and I have ‘zero’ chance of understanding how to make a coffee with it!

So yet again, the futuristic coffee machine has been bought for the few that understand Klingon and the rest of us well….we’ll just have to watch and learn the ways of the Star Trek empire!

Do we want to make a coffee with sugar and milk or do we want to launch a super sonic missile because I don’t feel ultra comfortable touching a screen button that seems to have been written by the Borg!

By,

Left On The Shelf.