Ever sit back and wonder ‘who am I?’ Sure, you know your name. You know when you were born and, presumably, where. You know where you work. You know your brothers and/or sisters. You know your kids (if you have them), and your significant other. But those things aren’t who you are. Those things are just facts about your life. Those things are the things that you put on that form when you go to the doctor.

Who are you? Does anybody really know? I think about it sometimes, especially when I’m asked to write a biography for a website, or an event that I’m going to be attending, or some such thing. Who am I? That’s a harder question that anybody realizes. Are you making decisions and doing things based on who you are? Or are you just reacting to the things and the people around you?

I got to thinking about it again today, when I started to contemplate what to write about next. What kind of essay or article or blog can I put out there that people are actually going to want to read. For that matter, why in the world would anybody want to read my thoughts, opinions and musings. I mean, ‘who the hell am I?’ I’m not an expert in anything in particular.

No, but I am me. I grew up fast and learned at an early age to be self-reliant and to try to figure out how to do things for myself before asking for help. I love music. I can listen to most (not all) forms of music. I’ve been known to go from Rascal Flatts to Metallica to Madonna in the same playlist. I love television—a bit too much—and movies. I’m a nerd. I love video games, and play often—and not just Tetris or Solitaire on my computer. I’m a gamer, and play Skyrim, the Sims and Left 4 Dead. I love sci fi and fantasy, superheroes and the paranormal. I was that girl in high school that carried a book in her purse and sat alone to read at lunch.

I’ve loved books as far back as I can remember. Even before I could read, I had the Snow White and the Seven Dwarves Little Golden Book memorized. When I’d sit on my father’s lap and he would read it to me, I’d follow along as though I was reading it, too. I could write my own name before I started school, and I’ve never stopped. I wrote my first book in the 2nd grade (Princess Trisha and the Toothbrushes), and that was when the writing bug bit. I suddenly realized I could create my own stories.

Of course, I didn’t get serious about it until I was in the 7th grade. I’d devoured every book in the school’s library that was designated for my age group, and then got special permission to take books off the shelves reserved for the 8th graders. That was where I found the book that really started it all. It was called “The Initiation” by Robert Brunn. It was about vampires, and it kept me up at night. But when I finished it, I was starving for more. Unfortunately, there were no more books like it at the school library—this was long before Twilight or the Vampire Diaries—so I thought ‘why don’t I just write my own?’

And I did. At first, I was bursting with stories to tell, and I would jump from one to another, leaving stories unfinished all over. I got tired of trying to think up new characters each time, so I decided to create a core group of characters and write different stories about them. This is when The Lockwood Chronicles was born. Alexander and Madeline were much different people back then, as they were written by an idealistic and naïve teenager. I had a lot of life to live before I could write truly believable characters, and I think I manage that now (most of the time).

I’ll write about werewolves and witches, aliens and even regular people, but I always go back to the vampires. I’ve devoured untold number of books about vampires, fiction and nonfiction. I won’t say I’m an expert, but I know more than the average person about vampires. I even wrote a paper for my religion class in college about Dracula—the prince, not the count. At work they think I’m a vampire because I prefer to have the window shades closed and I like overcast days (that sun really is too bright). If I could, I would become a vampire. I believe some form of vampire actually exists, but I’ll also bet it’s not the Hollywood version—most of what those vampires are has nothing to do with the original legends. But that’s a topic for another day.

I envision a future where I have the time to write. I see myself curled up at a desk or table with my laptop in front of me, music playing, writing to my heart’s content without having to worry about structuring my life around a day job. I see at least two dogs at my feet, keeping me company, and I see my significant other (my boyfriend, for lack of a better term, since we’re not married), in the next room playing video games or out in the garage working on a car. It’s a nice, relaxed, secure life.

That’s mostly who I am. It can’t be summed up into a simple paragraph. It can’t even be summed up here, as I know I left a lot of stuff out. My love for my family, my love for dogs, and the love of my life (my boyfriend). There’s much more to me than what I’ve described here, but there are some things that you should keep to yourself.

So…who are you?

Submitted: April 23, 2018

© Copyright 2023 Katrina LaFond. All rights reserved.

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