The Loss

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic

Tupperware has many functions in life, and death

Submitted: April 28, 2018

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Submitted: April 28, 2018



The Loss


“It's a shame the journey home took so long.”

“Yes, and losing Uncle Gerald’s ashes didn't help.”

“Those custom officers seemed to think it was some big joke, I can only hope Uncle Gerald can forgive me.”

“I’m sure he has, he's probably looking down on you now thinking...”

“Oh do you think so? I do hope he's looking down and not staring up.”

“I'm sure he's exactly where he should be, even if half his ashes are in an airport bin.”

“Yes well, if they hadn’t grabbed it, the urn would never have broken. It makes me cross just thinking about it.”

“Your screaming at them claiming unnecessary force didn’t help though, I think that just made them mad.”

“Well it was unnecessary force, you can’t just go around taking other people’s ashes.”

“They asked you to put them down and you refused, it looked suspicious.”

“How did it look suspicious? I am a respectable woman, of course I don't look suspicious!”

“You were hiding a pot containing white powder going through customs.”

A glare in her companion's direction. Then:

“Well, we're here now.”

“Yes, there's no denying it. We certainly are. Is this standard dress?”

“I think everyone looks...well, what I mean to say is that it's important to keep up with fashions.”

“Lets hope this isn't what's expected at the funeral, I have nothing in my wardrobe.”

“We shall wear what we usually wear.”

“You have usual wear for funerals?”

“You know what I mean. Smart. Black. With a hint of grieving while maintaining dignity.”

“You lost that when you slapped the customs officer.”

Another glare. Then:

“Look there's a cab over there, we'll take it into the city, get the bags.”

“Sure I'll get the bags, you go ahead and jump in the back, I'm absolutely fine doing everything by myself. Not a problem. No problem at all.”

“Wonderful, I am exhausted after the trip.”

“Yes, we wouldn’t want you to join Uncle Gerald before your time, would we? Where is Uncle Gerald?”

“Well, you said he was in heaven dear.”

“No, I mean the rest of his ashes in the Tupperware they gave us.”

“I gave it to you when I went to the ladies.”

“No you didn't, you took it with you, vowing that Uncle Gerald wouldn't leave your side after the incident in customs.”


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