Train Ride Home

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Flash Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic

Ah, the ride home! --- They said what?

Submitted: May 09, 2018

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Submitted: May 09, 2018



Hank had just moved to the city and was having to take a commuter train home.

One Friday afternoon Hank boarded the train only to fined it packed full and there was no empty seats; so Hank had to stand.

Shuffling from one empty area of the car to another was necessary when passengers got off and on. So hank quiet often found himself inadvertently listening to various conversations going on around him; like these that follow.


"Karen, are you really going to marry Larry?"

"Sure Wanda, he is good looking, charming, and has loads of money."

"But Karen, he is seen running around with other women all the time. After you are married, well, I doubt that his wandering will stop. Don't you know that you will spend many nights alone."

"Oh, I won't be alone; believe me sweety, I won't be alone."


("Fourth Street depot, please exit to your right!")


"Hay Charlie, the boys in the office told me that your Mother-in-law doesn't drive."

"Well they are wrong! She drives just fine, from the back seat."


("Lincoln Avenue depot, please exit to your right!")


One man asks another, "Hay Harry, now that you are living in the suburbs of Stratton, what do you miss?"

"The Stratton Depot exit, mostly."


("Second Street depot, please exit to your right!")


A few people got out of the subway car and Hank saw his chance for a seat: he took it without hesitation.

Shortly after, two men came in and stood near enough to Hank where he could hear them, and this is what was said,   "Steve, you are a lair and a cheat. But I signed that stupid contract without reading the back so I will pay your ridicules finders fee; but I want a written receipt."

"Why would need a receipt, Sam, you will have a canceled check as proof."

Look Steve, I want a receipt with your signature on it. When I get to the Pearlie Gates and I have to show St. Peter proof of my fair dealings with humanity, well, I don't want to have to go looking all over hell for you."


(The Stratton Depot,  please exit to your right!")



("First Avenue and Main Street, please exit now.")


"Hay Harry, wake up! I think you missed your exit!"

"Damn, not again!


Two women sat down next to Hank, one stated, "It was wonderful, Ann, my husband and I just got back from a world tour."

"How exciting, Lois. Did you see Paris?"

"Well of course, Ann, it was all so beautiful."

"Are you well versed in French?"

"I took a crash course and sailed right through it. But the French people need to brush up some, their French is terrible."

"Tell me more, Lois?"

"Well, Ann, we saw Egypt and the Holy Land."

"Really, Lois, did you go up the Nile?"

"Of course, we went all the way to the top, it was a lovely view.

But I was a little disappointed with the Holy Land. It is really old and rundown, nothing like what I expected. They have the same problems in parts of Rome too, buildings falling down; it's a shame."


(Last exit, all transfers and tokens will be taken at the east gate.)


Hank boarded the transfer train and sat down next to the door. Soon a man sat down next to him and was nervously looking at his watch.

"Are you running late?" Hank asked in a concerned manner.

The man looked at Hank with a disgusted look and replied, "Only when this train is!"


Then a man seated across from Hank began offering his views on politeness and showing kindness to everyone. He stated, "I look for beauty in all women!"

A very flat-nosed woman, that was seated on his left, interrupted and said, "Sir, look at me and my very flat nose. Now tell me that I am not ugly."

The man quickly replied, "Madam, like the rest of the female race you are an angel that has fallen from heaven. Unfortunately, and by no fault of your own, you landed on your nose."

The woman looked impressed, until the man offered his business card; "Ronald J. Stone, Reconstructive Surgery."


(Midtown Station, please exit to your right!")


Hank got off at the Midtown Station and his wife was waiting for him. As he got in the car she asked how his day was.

"My day was pretty normal," Hank replied, "but the train-ride home is always different."



D. Thurmond / JEF



© Copyright 2019 D. Thurmond, aka, JEF. All rights reserved.

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