South Park Christmas story: There and Dr. Who and Elemental Warrior

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Fan Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic


This is an old work for Christmas during my high school days so before they were elemental guardian warriros they were just elemental warriors

Submitted: June 09, 2018

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Submitted: June 09, 2018

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South Park theme starts

I'm goin' down to South Park

gonna have myself a time.

(Stan+Kyle) Friendly faces everywhere
humble folks without temptation.

Goin' down to South Park
gonna leave my woes behind.

(Cartman) Ample parking day or night,
people spouting HOWDY NEIGHBOR!

Heading on up to South Park
gonna see if I can't unwind.

 

(Kenny 10(half)-current seassons)
I like fucking silly bitches, cause I know my penis likes it.

So come on down to South Park
and meet some friends of mine!

 

At Whistlin' Willy's

Stan, Kyle, Kenny and the rest of the boys were happy to see The Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug

 

Stan

Man that was a great movie we just saw.

 

Kyle

I know right the dragon did you see it.

 

Timmy

Timmy!

 

Jimmy

That's right Timmy. It it it was big an-d scary but cool.

 

Kenny looks around and realized Butters and Cartman were not with them

 

Kenny

(Muffled)

Where's Cartman and Butters

 

Stan

Yeah where is Cartman and Butters

 

Craig

Ever since Cartman saw that film I saw him walked off with Butters talking about another one of his evil plans

 

Stan

Evil plan which one

 

Butters comes in fear

 

Butter

Oh my God! You guys, Cartman is going to Disney World!

 

Stan

Oh No!

 

Kyle

Oh No!

 

Kenny

(muffled)

Oh No!

 

Kool-Aid guy break through the wall

Kool-Aid guy

Oh Yeah!

 

Boys get astonished to see the Kool-Aid

 

Stan

What the-

 

In Disney World

Mickey Mouse has created a device that can bring back the dead.

 

Mickey Mouse

At last I created Resurrection that can bring back my creator from the dead and then we will start off by eradicating the Jews! (Makes an evil laugh)

Mickey Mouse hears a laughter so familiar he turns around and sees Cartman with a gun.

Well, well, well if it isn't Cartman the son of a Denver Bronco/Ginger

 

Cartman shoots Mickey Mouse in the knee cap Mickey grovels in pain. Cartman walks over to Mickey's table and picks up the Resurrection

 

Cartman

So this is the Resurrection.

(Cartman turns around looks at Mickey and then sits on the chair)

You may be wondering where I heard about this device it was duck friend

(Mickey is shocked)

Thats right the duck you know how I got the information out of him. I met pact with some critters and they were so willingly to do it that your friend sort of became dinner.


Mickey Mouse

What are your plans of using the device.

 

Cartman

That is none of your concern. I'm not only here for that device alone I'm here for another a device called MTTD

 

Mickey Mouse

I don't know what your talking about

 

Cartman

Well if you don't know about MTD then I have something to say to you mouse. I may be part ginger and I'm going to kill you and suck my balls.

(Cartman kills Mickey Mouse. He then pulls out a knife and cuts open Mickey and finds the device called MTTD.)

Now I am now able to travel into any universe I wish and I choose Middle-Earth.

 

 Middle-Earth in Barad-Dur

The Witch-King and his Nazgul watch the armies of Mordor walk into battle.

An orc comes in and tells that mysterious figure has come to see the Witch-King. The mysterious figure with two of his followers. The mysterious figure spoke in black speech.

 

Mysterious figure

Hello Witch-King its been a while.

 

Witch-King

Roman its been a while since you came to our world.

 

Roman (speaks in English)

Yes it has been a while

 

Then they see blue lights and they see Cartman coming out of it.

 

Cartman

Well, well, well if it isn't-

(Gets shocked to see the villain Roman)

Who the fuck are you.

 

Roman

I am Roman and you must be Cartman the Ginger

 

Cartman

Ginger!

(Cartman pulls out a gun and points it at Roman.)
 

Roman

You know your gun is not worthy of killing me.

 

Cartman

I'm not using this gun on you but what if I told you that I have the knowledge to bring back your masters back to life.

 

Roman

Knowledge from a little boy.

 

Cartman

Yes and all you have to do is to capture Santa Claus.

 

Witch-King

Santa who?

 

Roman

I know of this Santa Claus and I heard that he exists in your world.

 

Cartman

Wait how did you-

 

Roman

You think your the only one that carries Multiverse time travel device that’s right I been your world before and I seen your methods and what do you need of Santa Claus.

 

Cartman

Its none of your concerns and so are you with me or not.

 

In the real world

12/21/13 8:00pm

Jenny Damiano was dancing and singing at an ECU Christmas party

 

Jenny Damiano

Let's go to the beach, each

Let's go get away
They say, what they gonna say?

Bad b-tches like me, is hard to come by
The patron on, let's go get it on

The zone on, yes, I'm in the zone
Is it two, three? Leave a good tip
I'mma blow off my money and don't give two sh-ts

I'm on the floor, floor
I love to dance
So give me more more, till I can't stand

Get on the floor, floor
Like it's your last chance
If you want more, more

Then here I am

Starships were meant to fly
Hands up, and touch the sky

Can't stop, 'cause we're so high
Let's do this one more time

(Sighs and stops singing)

I wonder what Josh Ng is doing

 

Somewhere on the road Wallette Watson was driving with Josh Ng and they were singing Eminem Love the way you lie

 

Josh Ng

I can't believe we won that Eminem contest

 

Wallette Watson

I know right I was Rhianna and you were Asian Eminem

 

Josh Ng

Asian Eminem I like that.

 

Suddenly a sleigh fell from the sky right in the middle of the road.

 

Wallette Watson

What the heck.

 

Josh Ng

Wallette stay in the car.

(Josh gets out of the car and investigates the sleigh. He sees dust and smells it)

(Says softly) Dark magic.

 

Suddenly Red and Green lights flashed upon him and he disappears out of the blue.

 

At Sarah's house Sarah Beebe and Sophie Sherman were upstairs hanging out.

 

Sophie Sherman

So did you call Josh

 

Sarah Beebe

Yeah Josh usually calls back.

(Then she hears screaming)

Why is that scream familiar.

 

Then a small dragon comes through Sarah's wall and onto Sarah's face.

 

Sarah Beebe

Get it off of me.

 

Sophie Sherman then recognizes the dragon

 

Sophie Sherman

Hey its Yu.

 

Yu

Ah Lady Sherman it’s been a while I was wondering- Oh forget what I say Josh has been captured.

 

Sarah Beebe

Captured by who

 

Sophie Sherman

Roman, Sasha, Psycho

 

Yu

Santa's elves

 

Sarah giggles

 

Sophie Sherman

Sarah this is serious but Yu did Josh really get captured by Santa's elves.

 

Yu

Lady Sherman did a dragon ever lie to you.

 

Sophie Sherman

Man I can't believe I'm gonna trust a perverted dragon

 

In Susie's house

 

Susie Mirabini

So let me get this straight Josh has been captured by Santa's elves.

 

Sophie Sherman

I thought about it at first but then again we did see a dragon before so why not Santa Claus

 

Susie Mirabini

Sophie remember that dragon almost saw us naked

 

Sarah Beebe

True.

Yu

Come on guys I may have failed but Josh and Santa Claus are seriously in trouble.

 

All three girls

Santa Claus!

 

Yu

Oh shoot.

 

Somewhere in the North Pole

Josh was being interrogated by Elves

 

Elf 1

What have you done with Santa Claus?

 

Josh Ng

Santa Claus? He real.

 

Elf 2

That's right if Santa Claus is real then we're real.

 

Josh Ng

but one of you is black.

 

Elf 3

And whats the problem with that

 

Josh Ng

Uh no there is no problem with that

 

Elf 2

Now again what have you done with Santa Claus?

 

Josh Ng

I don't know where Santa Claus is.

 

Meanwhile Jenny was walking to her car until she heard something from she turns around and sees nothing. She then starts walking to her and then hears

 

Dalek

Exterminate!

 

Jenny sees a human-sized pepper shaker firing a blaster at her. She quickly dodges the blasts and she pulls out a mini shotgun and fires at the thing killing the thing. Jenny then walks over to it and sees a small a one eyed octopus inside of it. She then hears more of them coming saying

 

Dalek 2

Exterminate!

 

Dalek 3

Exterminate!

 

Jenny took cover from the Daleks' blaster fire. Jenny then looks inside her purse then she sees something glowing. Jenny grabbed the glowing object it was a small curved bow that Josh gave her last summer. Jenny pulls it out and grew full human sized. Jenny then remembered what Josh said,

 

Josh Ng

The bow of Galadhrim used by Lorien Elves and Legolas but with the help from the doctor he made some improvements.

 

Jenny Damiano

Improvements.

(Jenny pulls the string and then an arrow appears)

Impressive.

 

The Dalek approached her and then appeared she appeared 3o'clock

 

Jenny Damiano

Hey pepper boy eat this.

(She fires the bow and kills one of them)

 

The Dalek fire there blasters again Jenny dodges the blasters and fires her bow killing 7 Dalek. Then a Dalek shot her in the back and then it turns out to be a hologram. Jenny then slashes the thing in half with one of her long knives. She then puts her knives back together to form her bow.

 

Jenny Damiano

Thank you Josh.

 

Dr. Who

Impressive what you did

 

Jenny turns around and sees a familiar face.

 

Jenny Damiano

Josh

 

Dr. Who

Yes I maybe Josh Larsen but I'm not him I'm the doctor and I know Josh Ng and he is in danger and the faith of Christmas as well..

 

Meanwhile in Barad-Dur

Santa Claus has been captured by Witch-King, Roman, and Cartman and is in one of the towers.

 

Santa Claus

What is going on?

 

Roman

Now since we captured Santa Claus for you Cartman tell us this knowledge.

 

Cartman

Your looking at him. You see Santa Claus knows everything and knows who, where, and how to resurrect your masters easily without the One Ring or destroying the Hope Diamond. But we need to torture the information out of him and it is good thing that we put the blame on someone else.

 

Orc captain comes in

 

Orc Captain

The Dalek leader has come.

 

Dalek leader appears

 

Dalek Leader

We have a problem. The Doctor knows of our plan.

 

Cartman

Did you kill him?

 

Dalek leader

We tried but failed we must exterminate him.

 

Roman

That maybe too late we must prepare for battle.

 

Cartman

What!

 

Roman

Since the Doctor knows of our plan he is likely go to someone and that someone has a group of agents and they are

 

At Josh's house in the playroom Susie, Sophie, and Sarah pack weapons and gear to save Josh Ng and Christmas while the music “My Sharona” plays

 

Susie Mirabeni

(Talks in sexy way)

We're back chicos!

 

Sarah Beebe

So where is our ride.

 

Then a big dragon appeared before them outside. The girls went outside and it was not a Chinese dragon but a European Dragon from Britain.

 

Draco

I am Draco and I am here to assist you.

 

Sophie Sherman

Draco the name of the constellation

 

Draco

Yes and I come from stars and it has been told that Smaug has been resurrected once more.

 

Sarah Beebe

Smaug?

 

Susie Mirabini

Smaug, I have heard of that name before. Its the same dragon that destroyed Erebor and the City of Dale and almost Lake Town

 

Draco

That's right.

 

Sophie Sherman

How did you know that.

Susie Mirabini

Josh told me about him and he must be stopped.

 

At Disney World

Jenny Damiano and Dr. Who has met with Stan, Kyle, and Kenny.

 

Dr. Who

So Cartman has struck again

 

Jenny Damiano

You know I always wanted to kick his ass

 

Stan

So where do you think he is at?

 

Kyle

Well we are at Disney Land and Mickey Mouse body is still here and it looks like there was something inside of Mickey.

 

Jenny Damiano

From what Josh told me our world carries an MTTD. A multiverse time traveling device that can let us travel to any universe you. Its almost like the TARDIS but smaller. The only people who carry one is Josh and Roman. It looks like Mickey had one too.

 

Kenny then spots a fuzzed up video diary. Kenny pressed play on it and it was Mickey Mouse telling about the Resurrection and how it is able to bring back the dead. Kyle then remembers what Butters said about a dragon.

 

Kyle

Butters said something about a dragon from Middle-Earth, know any of them.

 

Dr. Who

The only dragon I know is Smaug.

Jenny Damiano

Smaug. (Softly) I've heard that name before. Oh no, I know what Cartman's plan for using both of those devices.

 

In Barad-Dur Cartman visits Smaug

 

Cartman

So how does it feel to be brought back from the dead

 

Smaug

It feels great and I wish to take out Erebor but as a dragon I will kill the one you call Kyle the Jew before I take back Erebor.

 

Cartman

Excellent.

 

In the North Pole

 

Josh Ng

So your name is Clarence Peebody.

 

Clarence Peebody (Elf 1)

Yes (Embarrassingly)

 

Josh Ng

Well its nice chatting with you well I must

 

Clarence Peebody

What!?

 

Josh Ng

Dwarf mode!

 

Josh Ng transform into a middle-earth dwarf and takes out all of the Santa's elves.

 

Josh Ng

Now its time to save Christmas!

 

Meanwhile in Middle-Earth the Josh's angels are flying on Draco until they get a call from Jenny and she tells them about Cartman's plan.

 

In Barad-Dur Roman and Morder's forces wait for their enemies. Then a fireball struck at them. Cartman took cover while Roman took it like a boss. Then the TARDIS  appeared and Jenny popped out of it and started killing every orc and dark mage in her path.

 

Roman

So it begins.

(He then sees Cartman running away. He catches up to him and grabs him by the neck.)

I know what your plan is Cartman the Ginger.

 

Cartman

What but how did you-

 

Roman

You should have known that I am a dark mage. Making Cartman land yours again I would have asked Santa to give me the world.

 

Smaug then appears behind Roman. Roman sees the dragon and attacks it but then a leprechaun appears and stops Roman's attacks.

 

Roman

You have a lot of allies Cartman

 

Cartman

Yeah and they are going to take you and so you can suck my

 

Roman telekinetically breaks the leprechaun's neck and then Draco tackles Smaug while Josh's Angels jump off of him and land on the platform where Roman and Cartman are.

 

Roman

My turn. Fuck you lucky charms.

 

Susie Mirabini

Roman I should have known.

 

Roman

You think your three can stop me.

 

Josh then appears and sees the Leprechaun.

 

Josh Ng

Huh that looks like Luke.

 

Roman

Josh I thought you were-

 

Josh Ng

Captured by elves I don't think so. Ladies I will deal with these two go save Santa Claus.

 

Josh's Angels quickly went off to save Santa Claus while Josh starts to fight Roman. The Josh's Angels started to attack guards who were preventing them from reaching him. Susie uses her ax and maul and combination of uzis to kill them. Sarah used a shotgun and knives to kill every enemy in her path. Sophie gracefully used double twin swords to kill the enemy silently and assault rifle to clean up the mess. As they reached Santa there was the Dalek leader pointing his blaster at Santa.

 

Dalek Leader

Take one more step or I will exterminate! Santa Claus.

 

Susie then started to move around in a sexy way Sophie and Sarah follow then the Dalek exploded and they saved Santa Claus.

 

The End!

(Just Kidding)

 

Meanwhile Roman was on ship having escaped the clutches of Josh he is now talking to his master.

 

Roman

I have found my lord but I fear then device will not work on a god.

 

The Master

(Shadow talk)

Did you find the stone?

 

Roman

Yes I did.

 

As Josh looks at his ship Jenny sees him and says

 

Jenny Damiano

(sighs)

He may have gotten away but we saved Christmas.

 

Josh Ng

Yeah its great to see you one more time.

 

Dr Who looks at them and then sees them hugging and then he smiles on what he sees which reminds him about his companions who died from the weeping angels. Then he looks at Stan, Kyle and Kenny holding Cartman.

 

 

Dr. Who

So ready to go home boys.

 

The three boys

Yeah!

 

Cartman

I will never forget this.

 

As they enter the TARDIS it disappears and the Josh's Angels and Santa break the fourth wall and says

 

Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas!

 


© Copyright 2018 Dean Zhou-Lee 47. All rights reserved.

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