The Dreams

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Young Adult  |  House: Booksie Classic


Just a bundle of short stories about my life or some other stuff.

Submitted: June 15, 2018

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Submitted: June 14, 2018

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I’ve been having some messed up dreams so I decided to type them out. They’ve been messing me up pretty bad, so I’ll turn them into little stories. But first, MY story. I was originally born in Sacramento, California. I was brought into this world by a loving mom and a fuck-face of a “dad”. I grew up in a town named Pollock Pines, over in Cali’. I had a sister that was born from another dad, so she didn’t live with me till later on. It was just me, my mom, and the OTHER person. Growing up in that house was hell. I don’t have any positive memories from that time. Ricky, my dad, was an abusive asshole who was thought he was a white thug. Nearly every night, he would beat my mom and scare her into submission, threatening her if she ever told anyone or if she left him. Only rarely did he get mad enough to take it out on me, but the memories of when he did are still there. Some nights though, it got really bad. My mom has a scar on her left arm, right under that elbow crease thing(You know, the bendy part) from him pushing her down the stairs at the house. On the way down, her arm caught the end of a nail sticking out of the wall. He didn’t allow her to go to the hospital, so it didn’t heal well. I personally didn’t get any scars, just a couple of black eyes and some other bruises. Anywho, fast forward a couple years. We moved in with my grandparents in a little town called Rescue. He still lived with us unfortunately, but I’ll come back to that. You remember me telling you about my sister, Janae? Apparently, she was also in an abusive household. Turns out her step-mom was a complete bitch. The bitch starved her sometimes, hit her all the time, didn’t let her go out of the house, she only allowed my sister to read like 3 books and that was it for any entertainment in the house. Well one night, it go so bad that the bitch punched Janae in the face and Mark, the husband came home right as it was happening. Come to find out, he was completely unaware all of this was happening. So being the nice guy at the time, he drove her all the way from Oregon to my grandparents house. She lived with us from then on. Woo, happy times. Now, back to Ricky. A couple months later, Ricky was caught with drugs and some other shit. Me and my sister got taken into child services and went into foster care for a couple of years. I was put into a pretty nice home with one other kid whom I’ll never forget. His name was David. He was only 5 at the time, I was 7. Poor kid didn’t even know why I was there. It was nice though, the parents were well off, pretty nice people. I, of course, didn’t like being in that situation. While I was there, my mom never stopped fighting for me in court. Ricky didn’t do much, which was expected. Around my 9th birthday, she got me and my sister back though. A couple weeks after that she kicked Ricky to the curb and put him on a bus to Florida. As soon as he left, she started packing, said we were moving to Tennessee with my aunt. And sure enough we left after a week of preparations. We drove all the way across the country, away from all the shitty memories back in California. We lived in Tennessee for 3-ish years. We then moved to Kentucky. Man oh man, the memories I made while we were there. I went through half of 4th grade all the way to the end of my freshman year in high school. It was the best time in my life, and the worst. I made friends I still have today. Met a girl I still haven’t fucking gotten over. It was nice. Until high school rolled around. I was 14 when I started high school. My body was starting to change drastically. My emotions, getting more and more screwed up and uncontrollable. I eventually contracted severe ADD, depression, and anxiety while moving through my first year in high school. I went through some dark times then. I even contemplated suicide for a while. I mean, what’s the point, right? All I’ve ever been through was shitty. My mind was clouded, my emotions out of control. I didn’t know what to do. So I started to cut. It went on for a good 4 months before I told anyone. I only showed the people I trusted the most. One of them told the guidance counselor at school. At the time I didn’t know, but just recently did I find out who did. They saved my life, no joke. The guidance people talked to me, said they were going to talk to my mom. I really didn’t want them to, and they didn’t. It wasn’t intentional, at least I don’t think. It was for the best that way anyways. I didn't want the drama from my family knowing, it would’ve just made it worse. Having everyone look at me like a kicked puppy, treading carefully over every single fucking word. I didn’t want that. I changed my ways. I tried to lean off cutting. I turned to other ways of dealing with it. I  tried the rubber band exercises, I tried working out, I even turned to dipping which really didn’t help that much. None of that shit worked. I thought it was all over for me when she came into the picture more. The girl I couldn’t get over, Haley. I was a real asshole, I was pretty messed up in the head, didn’t know how to handle anything. I think I took it out on her the most though. Like father like son, am I right? No matter how much I pushed her away, she was always there for me, didn’t matter what I did. I still don’t understand her sometimes, but she’s pretty much my rock now. I always try to go to her whenever I go on a down from my depression. The meds don’t really work, so I try to talk to her. I do other stuff like draw pictures, and write stuff like this. I don’t want to keep it all inside again. I put into other things instead. Anyways, I eventually climbed back up from the depths of my mind. I was better by the end of the school year. My mom, at the time, was seeing a man. His name was Steve, and he would eventually become my new step-dad. So towards the beginning of summer, he proposed. They got married sometime in July. Things were great. For a little bit. After the wedding, they decided that we were to move up to Evansville with them. Fuck. Everything that I had built up, shattered in the blink of a fucking eye. My friends, gone. My house that I spent 5 years in, gone. Down the slippery slope I go again. I thought my life was pretty much ruined at that point. My sister moved out of the house around my 7th grade year, so she stayed in Kentucky. I was thrown into a new life. 2 new step-brother, a new step-dad, a new house, new school, new city. It fucking sucked. It still sucks. Like, major ass. I hate my new school. It’s filled with gangster wannabes who care about weed or sex. Yes, even the girls. Out of the 600 students, 3 are my friends. 2 of which I never talk to anymore, so really, I have 1 friend. My classes sucked. I didn’t even get to take anything related to my career path, which was cool I guess. My house is pretty chill. It’s a log cabin looking place, 2 stories, garage, nice backyard. It’s nice. My step-brothers are kind of cool. One’s 17 and the other 13. Both are pretty annoying. I’m used to peace and solidarity and they always come in and scham it all up. Which is I guess what you get from brothers. I wouldn’t know though. Aaanywho, I’ve been in quite the dip with my depression recently and I can’t seem to climb out of it. I decided to type this out to see if it’ll help. Meh.~

 

Dream 1- The Ambulance

~These are real dreams I’ve been having repeatedly, sometimes I have them 2 or 3 nights in a row. I don’t understand them, if they mean something or represent something. All I know is that they suck major ass. They are in my perspective..~

 

“Shit!” I yell, shooting up from the couch. “What the hell was that?!” I ask aloud. No one answers me. “Hello?” I say to an empty house. I slide my legs off my couch and plant my feet on the carpet. I look around my living room. “Empty…” I say pushing off of the couch. I hear...sirens? I walk over to my front door and wrap my hand around the handle. I twist and swing open the door. I watch as an ambulance shoots past my house. I open my screen door and step out onto my porch. I look to the left. I see multiple ambulances and police cars gathered around each other. I walk back inside and put on my tennis shoes, then walk back outside. I start to jog towards the scene. As I’m jogging, I try to asses the situation. “Looks like a head on collision between a large SUV and some sort of smaller convertible. I decide to jog a little faster, things do not look good for that convertible. I start to approach the scene. A paramedic stops me in my tacks. “Sir! Do not come any closer, it’s not pretty.” He says. “It’s alright, I’m taking medical classes in school. I want to help you guys.” I respond. “Alright, just don’t fuck anything up, alright?” He says reluctantly. “Yes sir. I’ll try my best.” I say. I jog towards where the patients lay. The paramedics seem to be stabilizing them before moving them. I crouch down near the closest person. It’s a male, seems to be in his late 50’s. He has multiple lacerations on his left arm and a couple on his head. He seems to be in good shape. “Hello sir, can you tell me your name?” I ask the man. “Please! You have to help my granddaughter! She was in the backseat, I think she got messed up pretty bad. I’m fine, I promise. Just help her!” The man frantically pleads. I look at the man, ready to respond. “Sir, I ca-” I start to say. “Hey! I need some help here! I got a 16 year old girl, not looking too good. She’s lost a lot of blood. Someone, get your ass over here!” A medic cries out. “Please! That’s my granddaughter! Go help her, I’m fine!” The man pleads again. “Alright sir, if you need anything just yell for one of us, ok?” I say to the man. He nods his head and looks towards where his granddaughter lie. I turn my head to see what he’s staring at. “Yikes” I say under my breath. The medic was right, she does not look too good. I get up and jog over the the girl. I crouch by her feet, next to the paramedic. “What do we got sir?” I ask. “Not anything pretty, I can tell you that much.” He says. I look at the girl to see what’s wrong. “Well, she has a lot of cuts, maybe some head trauma? Let me che-” No, not her. “I shoot up from my crouch and scramble over next to her head. “Haley! Haley, can you hear me?!” I shout. “Zach? What...what are you doing here?” She says weakly. “I heard sirens and got curious. Can you tell me what happened?” I look into her eyes. They’re dim. The light in them almost gone. Damn. “Nevermind Haley, just try to conserve your energy. Just rest, okay? Just rest…” She looks into my eyes. “Zach….I’m sorry. It doesn’t look like that marriage that is gonna happen.” I intertwine my hand in hers. “Don’t say things like that girl. You’re gonna get hooked up and be right back on your feet, alright? Just stay with me bb.” I look at her and see her eyes are closed. I gently shake her. “Haley? Haley you gotta stay with me girl. Haley?” I get no response. “Haley...please..just open your eyes. Haley! Don’t do this to me..please!” I scream out. I feel her gently squeeze my hand. She opens her eyes and looks into mine. “I’m sorry Zach. I love you.” She closes her eyes. Her hand goes limp and falls to the ground. “No...no just wake up. It’ll be fine...just wake up.” I slide my hand under her head and pull her into a hug. “I love you too.” I gently lay her onto the ground. “No! Not my granddaughter!” I see the old man shoot up and run over to her. I slowly get up and step back. The man crouches down and hugs her now lifeless form. “Why?! Why her god? Why?!” He screams to no one. I look up to the sky. Everything starts to fade to black.

 

~There you go. It was pretty trash but this is mainly for me. Sort of like a channel for my emotions.~

 


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