Midnight Sun

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic


This poem was written after working in Alaska during the summer months. I originally traveled here due to a situation that left me heartbroken, so fleeing seemed to be the right choice at the
moment. It was a temporary bandage. But during that time, I met many people that helped me to release my voice. I felt freer then I have in a long time. But when it was time to go home, I needed to
face my own demons again and use what I learned in the land of the midnight sun to my benefit. When I came home, I met someone that understood my pain and allowed me to be myself again. Going there
was a renewal for me and it was one that I will never forget.

Submitted: July 12, 2018

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Submitted: July 12, 2018

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I left the land of the midnight sun

and soared into the stars that have shown my past pain

ripped gauze where fleshy wounds bled

left scarred, marks of pride, and aches of the heart

where my feet trudged along my desert sands

and tried to make life grow again

 

And I howled at the moon as the sun set

running solo towards unknown distances

empty fields, free, finally free

where my once clipped wings now spread and climbed

to the highest mountain I could find

perched and present, out of the cages

and when I imagined my midnight sun, I sang

 

My song ended with finality when the moon shone to you

and I prayed to the heavens that my wings would not break

knock on wood, I hid it all while you howled for me

for us, for the aids that held us but left us broken

where love was a question, not an action

that no one had an answer for

but when I imagined my midnight sun, I felt

 

And I felt my guilty pleasure creep toward the center of my head

like a roach, I could never kill it if I tried

love is an overpowering grenade, self-detonating, I am innocent

Head and heart at war with no victory

surrender, pleasure over pain where passion takes claim

and renders the vulnerable pulse to a halt

so when I imagined my midnight sun, I lived

 

But when guilt struck, I forgot how to breathe

and I stumbled over life and love and trust of me

because I was always made in your image

a dilemma in itself, shaken, unknowing unlike yourself

The wrong of me you planted grew along the pillars in my mind

where I begged for no restraints, I am acquitted 

and where I imagined my midnight sun, I screamed.

 

Yet you held my hand when darkness crept and I wept

along the technological pages of my story

to where you whispered “all is well” to each word

and placed your lips upon the pages where my heart resigned

I've never felt freer than in the hands of someone as pained as me

where, somehow, our lives stitched together to make us warm again

and when I imagined my midnight sun, I loved


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