On Edge

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Status: In Progress  |  Genre: Non-Fiction  |  House: Booksie Classic

Submitted: July 19, 2018

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Submitted: July 19, 2018

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On Edge

My anxiety is like a disease; it lives within my cells. It taps on my skin and makes my face blush. Any transition or change of routine can make this reaction occur. Events that make others excited bring enormous amounts of stress to me. Many have attempted to cajole me into attending activities that make my skin crawl. I am older now and do not allow that to happen.

I will accept the label of loner if that is the consequence for remaining calm. If there is an impending social gathering my anxiety will be heightened. I have a few strategies to temper my nerves. Writing until the words stop coming or filling my time with organizing. These are futile attempts to distract myself and none of these tasks achieve the goal.

My typical response is avoidance. I realize that I am missing the opportunity to meet new people; but I can accept that. Some events cannot be avoided; family picnics, weddings and funerals. Yes, I put them in all in the same uncomfortable category.

I have read literature on the topic and have learned that many individuals also exhibit this state of being; misery does love company. The listening techniques in therapy help me to vent; but the feelings that accompany the anticipation of the event remain.


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