why i'm not calling....

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic


This is something I wrote in 2008 right after a breakup.

Submitted: August 11, 2018

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Submitted: August 11, 2018

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I want to talk to you so much it hurts. But you'll never know that because I'll never call, for fear of making things worse. You're just another guy who makes me feel awkward now, and acts like he never knew me at all.

Why did you have to give up? Why didn't you let me help you? All I wanted was to be with you.

I enjoyed our times together and your touch. Also, I don't think that I was asking for much.

You said that I was great, that Nic was too. So, why then did you push us away, instead of letting us get closer to you?

I thought that you were different, that you would respond to my emails instead of leaving me at a guess. Now I realize that you are just like the rest. Just like them, you think that you did the right thing by erasing me from your life after just 5 days of my trying, although maybe not my best.

You want me to call. Well, I'm not. I'm not gonna chase you or make myself look desperate.

I want you to miss me, feel bad for hurting me, so much that it makes your soul bleed. I don't deserve how you've made me feel. But, as far as I'm concerned, I'm great and you chose the raw end of the deal.

The way that you act is not what I need.


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