My Prayer

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Poetry  |  House: Booksie Classic

Submitted: September 20, 2018

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Submitted: September 20, 2018

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When Christ return he can change this water in wine

And I can explain why, Im so confused 

If we are to love each other

And I can honestly say I do

Then how can we hate each other

Still preaching the words that apparently came from you

These stones hurt worst then most of their words do

If you say its my heart and the love that spews,

Then why am I hated by many and loved by such few

Judged by even more, my family does to

But my heart means well thats why I've been blessed by you

 

See they don't know I beat myself up every chance that get

I often talk to you wondering, asking why am I different

Can you honestly blame women 'cause they experiment

When men call them names and cheat every chance they can get

But I mean no disrespect

I never doubted your existence 

What I doubted was the things mentioned

And the hands by which they were written

I try to keep this faith but always got knocked down

By the people that were bound to teach so we wouldn't drown

But the deeper that I dug

It hurt the more things that I found

That people would rather judge than to help another out

And I couldn't find truth anywhere that I looked 

Many times I touched that book

Hoping to find a switch or some relief from it

But I'd read one verse then the next contradicted it

 

This world is full of hatred

Many times I couldn't take it

Always knew you'd be back

Often thought I wouldn't make it

I have faith but the religious fanatics

Every chance took a stab at it

Even though i tried to grab it

Look at me like an addict

Or murderer or pedophile

But in their eyes Im worse off

There was nothing I can do to get them to back off

And understand this is my battle let me fight it

This is my book let me write it

If I bite off more than I can chew I might like it

So I decided, that I would no longer try to hide it

Im just gonna be me and eventually 

I would have to meet my maker 

And explain my actions

How my math equalled out to fractions

And my 1 plus 1 equalled an infraction

All I can say is I don't know what happened

I just wanted to live life the way it was natural to me

And be accepted by society but critically

I was different sexually

And I will never be accepted 

It hurt but I must accept it

I just always expected that you knew my heart

And when skies start to part

I would either take that walk

Or at least have a chance to tell my part

But tell them, they must know

That to hurt is not the way to go

How they expect someone to grow

When they stomp our egos

And what little self esteem we acquired in this life

What made them so perfect, built from imperfection that they got it all right

And since this is my life I'll take my punishment

But can you really blame me for not believing in men??


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