A Year Without You

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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Young Adult  |  House: Booksie Classic
Dedicated in memory of my mother, Laurie. You are still my favorite writer.

Submitted: September 30, 2018

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Submitted: September 30, 2018

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A Year Without You

 

At first, I wanted to collapse

Or cry, perhaps

But I stood as a skyscraper

For those around me

 

Hid the fact that the loss of you

Created a bullet wound

Although now everyone can see right through me

 

I notice leaves fall

Time passes slowly

I stood still although

I felt my body moving constantly

 

I am the definition of loneliness

I depend on glimpses of the past in my memories

I can only know you through your old, unfinished writings

Snow wraps my body in the cold that my heart felt this past fall

 

Forced to leave you behind

Until now I would pretend

that you were on a trip or lost maybe

Forced to acknowledge that you're gone indefinitely

 

Refill my heart with love

It leaks out through the cracks

I tried to fix with glitter glue

 

I broke one of my final promises to you

Spring passes in one quick wave

10 years ago you promised I wouldn't be here

I stand like a soldier - tall and brave

As my world continuously concaves

 

I act my age

Making happy not-so mistakes

Knowing all I wish I could do is tell you what I've been up to

Just like that, my sunshine is taken away

 

I visit where you were last laid

My final promised finally fufilled

The breeze is a welcoming embrace

A sign that says, "I've been waiting for you."

 

Am I allowed?

To take what you taught

Create something to make you proud

Keep my head high and live the rest of my life


© Copyright 2018 Jessica Emery. All rights reserved.

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